


Secrets in the Garden

by Hornet1x



Category: Mortal Kombat - All Media Types
Genre: Abuse, Abusive Relationships, Art, Daddy Kink, Diary/Journal, Domestic Violence, Emotional/Psychological Abuse, F/M, Fear, Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, Masochism, Mental Breakdown, Mental Health Issues, Painting, Photography, Psychological Torture, Punishment, Sadism, Stitches, Stockholm Syndrome, Torture
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-24
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-14 08:15:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 8
Words: 43,699
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29664378
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hornet1x/pseuds/Hornet1x
Summary: Jade was so in love with the good doctor until he revealed himself to be a monster...by then, it was too late.
Relationships: Jade/Kuai Liang | Sub-Zero, Jade/Liu Kang, Kitana/Kung Lao
Comments: 1
Kudos: 14





	1. Chapter 1

Against her will, she began to cry.

Slow sobs that seemed to come from the very bottom of her stomach...sobs that wracked her body, and pulled the most painful emotions out of the dark tangle that made up her heart. She cried what felt like bloody tears, and they slid like knives down her cheeks to land in a pool around her knees. 

Jade hung her head. The tears continued to fall, cutting into her skin and leaving burning trails of shame. She hated herself for crying. In fact, she hated himself for feeling anything deeply enough to make her want to cry. 

She knew she had displeased him in some way. She wasn't sure how exactly, but nevertheless Jade knew he wasn't at all happy with her. After getting home from work Jade had fallen asleep on the sofa in the living room, and when she had awoken, she had been handcuffed and propped against the wall in the basement with her clothes gone, leaving him to shiver under the chilled fluorescent lighting.

Jade's head was swimming. Feeling terribly groggy, she managed to turn her head slightly and move her arm a little. A tiny red spot hovering over a swollen vein caught her attention.

He had drugged her. Again.

 _With Thorazine, no doubt,_ she thought, tiredly. I _t's amazing that I didn't wake up when he injected it. That's what I get for marrying a doctor...and a good doctor at that._

The “good doctor” had done something like this before, drugging her while asleep so she'd wake up in a completely compromised state; filled with a pervasive sense of terror. The reason for such behavior was always the same: she had “displeased” him in some fashion.

Attempting to shake the cloudiness from her brain, she tried to sit up straight; her head throbbing from the effort. A soft clucking of a tongue emanated from the doorway of the basement. Jade lifted her head slightly to see her husband walking towards her, his patent leather shoes clicking as he descended the steps. Involuntarily, she cringed against the cold wall; residual aches registering in her back. She gritted her teeth and could have cried from that alone; she'd been so close to being completely healed from their last song and dance, and now this.

“You seem so sad, Jade,” her husband said, voice smooth and soothing like honey dripping from a spoon, though lacking its cloying sweetness. “Crying doesn't suit you, not at times like this. Where's your fire, huh?"

He sighed a little. In one smooth motion, he knelt before Jade, and rested one large hand on her tan, exposed thigh.

“You're always so difficult, you know that? I feel like I've been pretty clear in what I expect from you, and you...you just don't seem to get it. Or maybe you do get it and you just don't want to play the game, which, frankly, I find even more concerning."

Jade felt unbearably helpless in the face of her current circumstances, and as such, could only stare up at her husband with wide, fearful eyes; vague fury registering somewhere deep in her brain. Deep in the place where he was still able to muster up rebellion, but that part of herself was becoming weaker and weaker with every passing year.

Suddenly, her husband was reaching out a hand slowly, causing Jade to recoil against the wall. Staring at it with terror, cold sweat leaked out of Jade's pores as they regarded one another. Brown eyes studied her, eyes that were narrowed and methodical, but sudden humor ignited in them. Again, the hand drifted forward and caressed Jade's cheek, smelling of something medicinal; most likely the soap he'd used prior to sliding his hands into a patient laid out on the operating table.

"Are you going to recite the little poem we agreed on while I correct you?" He murmured, sliding a roughened thumb across Jade's lips.

Jade choked back another sob and nodded her head slowly. She didn't want to, but she knew she didn't have a choice; not if she wanted to be able to walk tomorrow.

"Say it for me now," her husband commanded, standing. "I like to hear it...I love to hear your voice at times like this. It's like we can be completely honest with each other."

Trembling, Jade closed her eyes and willed herself far, far away where misery was just another concept that didn't exist; a place where lemon drops melted above the chimney tops and bluebirds sang. Teardrops coursed down her cheeks as her tremulous voice filled the gloom, her mind working tirelessly to conjure up the happy memories before the horrors began.

"Louder, love," her husband said. "After all, this is for your own good, isn't it?"

He was preparing something but Jade wasn't going to try and piece it together in the darkness. In instances like this it was better to be surprised; usually that made it so whatever happened didn't hurt as much. She kept her eyes shut tight as she repeated herself, the words drenching the air and filling it with a light out of place in a world of such misery:

_Your heart is a dish,_

_Fill it with joy_

_And it will quench sorrow._

_Fill it with sorrow_

_And it will drown joy._


	2. Chapter 2

The years had been exceedingly kind to Jade in only very specific ways; her looks were one of them.

She studied herself in the caustic sunlight of dawn, a light that was typically unforgiving to those bathed in it; showcasing every flaw and imperfection possible. Though Jade had her fair share of bruises that morning, she had to admit that she was otherwise very fortunate. Her sorrows and fears were not etched in her flesh yet, but she had a feeling they would be before too long if she decided to stay and endure; an option that became less appealing to her with each passing day.

Jade had had to call out of work again, a fact that did not sit well with her, but she knew she didn't have a choice. The bruises from the good doctor's treatment were so prominent that no amount of coverup would mask them, and she couldn't exactly wear sunglasses to work, not in the small art gallery where she was employed. She had reason to believe that her husband was deliberate when placing the marks, furthering Jade's reluctance to stray out of doors; stray further from the ornate cage she found settled around her.

The cage was getting smaller and tighter every hour, and at times she couldn't help but feel suffocated; the walls closing in and blotting out the sunlight. She watched her reflection like she would a zoo exhibit, realizing now more than ever that she was on display; always being watched and assessed. Tiredly, she brushed her hair and tried to put it to rights, knowing that any signs of dishevelment would be frowned upon, and she fervently wished once again that his black hair would lie flat, that it would behave.

But why should it behave? She never seemed to, why else was she constantly being punished; corrected? She gazed into her green eyes like she would the ocean, but she could never find the bottom in their depths; they were filled with terror and misery, too turbulent to really understand. Sighing, she splashed some cold water on her face and tried to put on a smile, her husband wouldn't like her appearing so morose. The thing is, Jade knew that her husband was aware of how unhappy she was, but she didn't want to see it. So long as the truth was swept under the rug, order, or some semblance of it, could be maintained within their household.

Everything had to be just so every day.

Jade would wake at 7 am on the nose, regardless of whether or not she was going to work, and she would slip on her robe and house shoes, taking care not to disturb the doctor (if he was home, of course. There were certain times that he was on call at Fairbanks; called away to attend to one emergency or another, quite frequently in the middle of the night. It was during those times that Jade actually got to sleep soundly). She would proceed into the kitchen where she would brew that morning's coffee: hazelnut grounds, exactly 4 and a half scoops, no more, no less. She would prepare her husband's mug to his exact specifications: two teaspoons of raw sugar and a titch of cream. Jade never measured the cream, she knew the amount by heart at this point. She had learned very quickly just how creamy the coffee should appear; a medium, toasty brown.

She would fry up the turkey bacon and scramble a few eggs, and then she would set the table with a single red rose from the garden in a crystal vase. She'd open the blinds to let in the light, and then she would go and rouse the doctor, but never before 7:30. To awaken him any sooner or later would be a travesty, which would elicit a punishment. She couldn't be sure if it would be an involved affair or a quick smack, but she did everything in her power to avoid finding out.

The doctor would be stretched out in their murky bedroom in the king-sized bed, strong chest rising and falling in languid dips, and Jade would always have to take a deep breath before kissing her awake. She always had to kiss her husband awake, it pleased him; it spoke of intimacy and affection that didn't exist, not in the true sense. The doctor had no trouble believing the lie, so long as it made her happy. Sometimes he'd want to have sex and Jade would allow herself to be thrown across the bed and taken, but more often than not her husband would rise and stretch, ready to meet the day; in absolute control of her surroundings.

They would dine together while her husband would read the paper, perfectly made cup of coffee languishing in his hand as he complained about the state of the economy and how poorly the Broncos were doing that season; during summer it was baseball, and then it was the Rockies who were the subject of his scrutiny. Jade would pick at her food and wait anxiously for her husband to finish, sitting on the edge of his chair the whole time as she waited for the other shoe to drop. She supposed that was part of the reason she found the whole situation intolerable; it wasn't the physical aspect so much as the emotional warfare. Who could say what was going to happen next?

After finishing breakfast, her husband would bathe and dress, coming out of the bathroom smelling like pine and other wild things; earth and musk and oceans, and Jade could almost remember the woman she used to be. She'd watch with large, waiting eyes as her husband readied to leave, and it wasn't until she heard her husband's car pull off that she'd be able to take a deep breath and just think. That was another hard part of the situation, she never felt like she was allowed to simply think because to think too deeply about her circumstances was a recipe for madness; absolute insanity.

The morning after her punishment her husband wasn't home, and that's why Jade had been afforded the opportunity to study herself in the mirror. She'd be home any moment, though, and she waited with baited, painful breath, not wondering what was going to happen next, but when was it going to happen. Something similar occurring again was an inevitability, she'd come to accept that, it was not knowing when that truly killed her.

Jade often wondered how her life had come to this, this dark place that drifted just on the fringes of reality, but she still couldn't piece together an acceptable answer. She was almost positive there wasn't an acceptable answer for what her life had become, and even if there were, it could never satisfy her.

Looking up, Jade realized she was no longer alone in the bathroom, that her husband was behind her and watching her in the glass; cold, brown eyes lingering and rendering their verdict. She shuddered inwardly, but she managed to keep the smile in place, even if it did slip slightly.

"Sitting like a princess perched on her electric chair," her husband smiled, coming over and draping his large hands on Jade's shoulders. "How are you feeling this morning? Sore?"

Jade nodded, her eyes straying downward as she worried her hands.

"A little."

"Poor baby. I'll take care of you once I've had a chance to decompress," he murmured softly. He paused for a moment, then:

"Aren't you going to ask me how work was?"

"Of course," she replied, static smile on his face.

"How was your day, Kuai?"


	3. Chapter 3

_ Dear diary, _

_ Did you miss me? I'm pretty sure you didn't, considering I wrote in you less than 9 hours ago, but I'm sure you'll forgive me for bothering you so much. Look, there I go anthropomorphizing you again - that word doesn't look right, can you use it like that? I'm sure it's totally wrong, but whatever. Once again, I'm sure you'll forgive me, right? I hope you will...sometimes it feels like you're the only real friend I have left. _

_ So, I'm sure you'll be happy to know that I was actually able to go back to work today. The bruises around my eyes faded enough that a little cover-up was enough to do the trick, so I'm pretty sure Kitana and Erron are none the wiser; at least I hope that's the case. Who can really say? I've missed so much work over the years that I'm sure they're suspicious at this point, they're just too nice to say anything. Not that I'm complaining, I could never hope to explain my situation...not to anyone. God, what could I even say? _

_ That's why you're so important to me, diary. You were there the first time the doctor grabbed me and left the bruises on my arm...the first time he used the cigarettes...hell, you were there the first time he took me to the basement. You've been there through everything. Honestly, I don't think I could've survived so long if you hadn't let me pour my heart into you...what little is left, anyway. Okay, I know that was corny but I'm sure you don't mind, right? You'll forgive me anything, even if the doctor can't do the same. _

_ Right now things are okay, I guess. I mean, he was in a good mood during breakfast this morning (for him, anyway). He even said the coffee tasted okay, even though I made it the same way I do every morning...every single morning...for five years. _

_ You know, I look at that in writing and it's staggering to me. Five years. That's a lot of coffee. Christ, that's a lot of trips to the basement. _

_ I can't be exactly sure what set him off the last time, and the trip to the basement is really hazy because of the Thorazine, but I think it had to do with coming home late from work. He always expects me to call him as soon as I get home (by 4:30 at the latest) if he's working, and I did, or at least I tried. There was traffic and then my phone died on the way home, so I had to charge it...by then it was already 4:35. I tried to explain but he doesn't appreciate apologies. He thinks I'm adopting the mindset that it's better to beg forgiveness than ask permission, and that would never ever sit well with him. _

_ Then I made the mistake of falling asleep on the couch even though I should've been awake and waiting, but I was so tired diary. He'd kept me up all night doing...well, I think you know what we were doing so I'm not going to go into excessive detail. I will say that handcuffs were involved; two sets. Two sets of silver handcuffs and - _

_ See, there I go going into detail even though I said I wouldn't. Where's my head, diary? What am I even thinking these days? Am I even thinking at all anymore? Between the basement and the medication I take, everything is a haze...but maybe it's better that way? What do you think, diary? _

_ I'm ashamed to admit that I cried last night when I managed to find a moment alone. But you know what? I didn't cry about the things the doctor's done to me, no, I cried remembering the nice things he used to do for me. You remember, don't you? Of course, you do...they're all written down on your pages...every surprise weekend trip and little present, every thoughtful word and compliment. They're all here and I miss them so much because they rarely happen anymore. _

_ Really, most people would be willing to throw in the towel at this point but not me, diary. If anything, I know I need to try harder. Don't I? If I try harder he won't need to correct me...he won't need to punish me anymore. I've been slipping lately, haven't I? I've been careless and thoughtless...I haven't put him first the way I'm supposed to... _

_ I'll do better, diary. How does that sound? Do you think I can do it? _

_ Well, I better get back to work...Kitana's giving me one of those looks. You know the ones I mean, I've described them to you before. I don't mind, of course; Kitana always means well. _

_ Just like Kuai. I know he loves me. I know you love me, diary; and I love you, too. _

_ Forever and always, _

_ Your Jade _

\-----

Jade sighed as she slammed her diary shut, feeling slightly embarrassed at the prospect of somebody seeing that she wrote 'dear diary' at the beginning of each entry; feeling sure that she'd be regarded as having the emotional maturity of a teenage girl. She couldn't help it, though. She hadn't been one to keep a diary or a journal when she was a kid, but when she started dating Kuai she'd changed. Suddenly Jade needed a place to vent, to put her thoughts, because before too long her outlets had been cut off from her, one by one; her husband had seen to that. She tucked the book into her bag and made a mental note to hide it as soon as he got home. It wouldn't do for Kuai to find it...no, that would be catastrophic.

Glancing around, Jade saw that Kitana was still watching her from across the gallery, arms crossed and violet eyes narrowed. Their eyes met, and all at once she was coming toward her, black high heels clacking against the wood floor.

"Everything okay?" She asked, approaching Jade's corner and frowning a little. "You were writing again. I know you always write when you're upset."

"Must you watch me during my lunch break?" Jade sighed, crumpling up the remnants of her lunch and tossing them in the trash.

"Jade, you were gone for a week," Kitana replied, voice softening a little. "I was worried. Kung Lao was worried. Christ, we're still worried! Can you blame us?"

Jade shook her head a little, a small smile playing over her lips though she tried to fight it. She hated showing how starved she was for this sort of concern, it made her feel so weak. Kuai Liang already made her feel that way most of the time, she didn't need it from outside sources, too; even if they were well-meaning.

"How is Lao, anyway?" Jade asked, fondness seeping into her blood. She hadn't seen him in ages, what with her job at the gallery and attending to her husband's needs. It didn't help that Lao worked such long hours as a vet tech, though he had to admire his dedication; he had always loved animals.

"Oh, he's fine," Kitana said, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear, one eyebrow cocked. She knew Jade was trying to distract her, clearly. "We're both running a little ragged what with the baby still not sleeping through the night."

"Hmm," Jade smiled, even more fondness filling her now. She glanced at Kitana covertly, thinking once again that no one would have ever believed that she'd had a baby less than a year ago, her figure having snapped back to its curved slenderness almost immediately. "I'd like to see Oliver soon, if I can."

"Jade, you know you're always welcome," Kitana replied, almost like she was exasperated. "We're always inviting you over but you never accept."

Jade flushed a little, looking down at a painting she'd been in the process of framing. She couldn't let Kitana see her eyes in that moment, they would've revealed too much. Kuai didn't like going out more than was absolutely necessary, and even then it was usually for a charity event or work affair; conferring with colleagues and schmoozing. They'd attended maybe 2 or 3 parties that their friends had hosted in the last year and a half, and Jade had been amazed at even that small amount.

"I'm sorry," she murmured, stroking a finger along the frame's gilded edge. "I'll talk to Kuai, I'm sure we can agree on a time soon."

Kitana was silent for a moment, her shoe tap tap tapping against the floor; worrisome little noises that plucked at Jade's nerves. Finally, she cleared her throat.

"You know, you don't have to bring Kuai if he doesn't want to come," she said, slowly; voice careful.

Jade's gaze immediately shot up, terror gripping her just at the prospect of going to a social affair without Kuai. It'd been so long since she'd done anything like that on her own, she wouldn't even know what to say; how to act. Besides, Kuai would never let her do that, not in a million years. She quickly shook her head.

"No, of course he wants to come, Kitana. Don't be ridiculous!" She tried to smile, but she knew it looked pained.

"Right. Because Kuai has always been the social type. I forgot." She peered at her. "Jade, are you sure you're okay? You've been so...god, what's the word? Quiet lately? Just...thoughtful, like your head isn't really here. Is there anything I can do to help?"

Jade smiled softly, loving Kitana for her meddling concern even though it made her anxiety increase dramatically. She shook her head slowly.

"Nah, I don't think so, but," she added, almost feeling shy. "Tell Lao I miss him, okay? Ask him if he can stop by here sometime so I can talk to him."

"Why don't you just call him -"

She broke off, clearly deciding that the question wasn't going to get them anywhere; not at the moment, anyway. Instead, she nodded her head a little, cheeks flushing prettily.

"Sure, yeah," she said. "I can do that."

Rubbing her hands, she glanced at a stack of photos that Jade had framed for the newest exhibit; the far wall empty and ready to be adorned. She picked one up, a lighthouse in stark black and white with waves crashing behind it. She smiled, but it was of a whimsical nature; eyes far away as they studied the picture in her hands.

"This makes me feel so lonely," she said, setting it back down. "But not in a bad way, you know? It makes me want to go out and explore...like I'm yearning for places I've never been to. Does that make sense?"

Jade studied the photo as well. It had been her favorite in the collection the photographer had sent over. It spoke of wild places and freedom, of throwing your arms wide as the sun rose over a new day and you had nothing but open possibilities. It almost hurt him to look at it.

"That makes perfect sense," she replied, softly. "All the sense in the world."

******

Jade stood back and studied the canvas stretched before her, cocking her head. She just wasn't sure where to start with this one, though she'd thought he had an idea; a good one, even. Now the canvas mocked her though, and her mind was hatefully blank, all inspiration flowing out of her at once. She sighed and threw down her paintbrush, frustration making her feel cross.

She sat on the floor of her studio and just stared at the whiteness spreading out like snowfields before her; reminding her of just how hatefully empty her mind was at the moment.

"I hate you," she muttered, bending her legs and propping his chin on his knees. She was clothed in her usual painting attire: an old white button-up shirt of Kuai's, her legs bare save for her pajamas. Jade liked to be almost naked when she painted, there was less cleanup and she liked to think that bare flesh made for an open mind.

The job at the art gallery had afforded Jade a plethora of advantages, some of them more obvious than others. It gave her a place to go to every day (so long as she was healthy enough), it provided social interaction, and it opened her up to a side of herself she hadn't even been aware of; the artistic side. At first, she had taken the job because it seemed harmless enough, and since Kitana owned the place she already felt comfortable with her, and most importantly -

"Kuai said I could," she said, softly; voice carrying through the studio and dying away.

That had been the deciding factor, after all. Kuai hadn't wanted Jade to work at all, had wanted her safe at home and waiting for him; attending to him. She'd made the very valid point that Jade didn't even need to work, that his salary as a cardiologist made enough for them to live well and then some. If anything, they lived in such opulence that most of the time Jade could barely comprehend it. The room she was sitting in, her gigantic art studio, was a testament to how well they were doing financially.

Jade had been terrified to even mention the possibility of taking the job to Kuai at first, but eventually, she had thrown caution to the wind and asked hurriedly over dinner one night, when her husband had been in a particularly good mood.

"A job? You?" He'd asked, setting down his glass of wine and peering through the candlelight at Jade; brown eyes hard and studying her closely.

Jade had nodded and looked down at her plate, perfectly prepared Beef Wellington sitting untouched before her.

"It'd only be part-time, and it's at Kitana's gallery, so -"

"Who else works there?" Kuai had asked, cutting her off.

Jade had shrugged, already feeling like she was losing the fight. Most likely she'd lost even before she'd begun.

"Erron. Oh, and Kung Lao helps out on occasion. And a few -"

"Kung Lao."

It hadn't been a question, and Jade had gulped, waiting for the tirade to begin; but it'd never come. Silence had stretched between them for an almost unbearable amount of time.

"Fine, but I want to check out this place before you start. Okay?" Kuai had picked up his fork and started eating again before Jade could answer.

"Y-yes, of course," Jade had stammered, hardly daring to believe her good fortune. "Are you sure, I mean -"

Kuai had cut her off with a look, his eyes having the uncanny, unsettling ability to inspire fear almost without effort. Jade had quickly gone silent, picking at her food carefully; trying to hide the smile that wanted to bloom on her mouth.

"Thank you," she'd whispered.

"Eat your food," Kuai had replied curtly. "It's getting cold."

It hadn't been too long after that that Kuai had done exactly what he'd said he'd do, coming down to the gallery and appraising it for himself. He'd met with Kitana and rolled his eyes at Erron, making sure to meet the other people Jade would be interacting with when she wasn't able to watch. After he'd given his blessing, Jade had started shortly thereafter, learning to frame and prepare the paintings and photographs gracing the walls. She'd help set up art shows and galas, and she couldn't believe how breathlessly happy she'd become just from having something to do.

For a while, after they'd married, Jade hadn't really been allowed to do much of anything outside of caring for the house and garden; making sure that Kuai's needs were seen to. It had eaten away at her soul because she'd gone to college, had even gotten her actuarial license, but she'd never gotten to use it. Kuai wanted her at home, so she'd stayed home. Even now, she viewed getting the job at the gallery as one of her biggest achievements, and this knowledge filled her with a strange sort of shame.

Jade had been at the gallery for a little over a year when she'd started doodling and sketching in her downtime, garnering inspiration from the art swirling around her. She had dabbled in art as a child but she'd never taken it seriously, but being surrounded by it constantly fed a need in her she hadn't realized she'd had. Like her diary, she'd found it to be a very worthwhile and needed outlet, so he drew and created; not really thinking much of it beyond enjoying it.

"Hey, you're actually pretty good," Kitana had commented one day, glancing over Jade's shoulder before she could hurriedly cover up the apple she was sketching; a byproduct of her uneaten lunch. Glancing around, she'd plucked up a tiny frame and handed it to Jade.

"I've had this frame laying around for ages and I never have anything that really goes with it," she said. "Why don't you draw or paint a little something and we can display it? I think it'd be fun for the patrons to see what the employees produce."

Jade had been reluctant to accept the frame, pretty and white and delicate, but eventually, she'd caved and taken it home. She'd hidden it from Kuai in the back of the closet and didn't think much about it for a couple of weeks. It wasn't until she was digging through the closet, trying to unearth her husband's heavier winter parka, that Jade had found the frame and held it for a moment, suddenly wanting to try and fill it with something.

The next week she'd brought it back to the gallery and had shyly given it back to Kitana, a watercolor scene sitting behind the glass of koi fish swimming.

"Oh, Jade," she'd breathed, eyes shining. "This is lovely. You're getting so good."

She had hung it with pride right next to Jade's corner where she worked on framing and other incidentals. Kitana had smiled at her with admiration and affection.

"Maybe someone will buy it," she'd teased, winking.

Jade had just laughed.

"I doubt it."

It wasn't too long after that that Jade had displeased Kuai in some fashion and earned a trip to the basement. She'd been out of work for several days and by the time she came back, she'd completely forgotten about the little painting. Until -

"Do you notice anything different?" Kitana had asked, appearing slightly mischievous.

Jade hadn't taken the bait, too tired and still too sore to play guessing games. She'd just cocked a brow and waited. She'd sighed, annoyed that she wouldn't play along.

"Your painting!" She'd gushed. "It was sold! Someone bought it!"

She'd just stood frozen for a moment at that bit of news, having to take a seat on her stool; eyes wide with surprise.

"R-really?" She'd asked. She had to be lying to her. There was just no way. Why would anyone buy something she'd painted? Kuai had made light of her efforts, calling them cute but otherwise unremarkable.

"Yes, silly! Isn't that great?" She'd replied, smiling widely. "Now you need to paint another!"

Now Jade was just sitting in front of the blank canvas and wondering if she'd ever come up with an idea. Usually, they came to her just out of nowhere, not when she actively called for them, but she'd wanted to paint for some reason; it always helped her relax.

"There you are," a low voice spoke behind him, startling Jade and making her turn.

Kuai was standing in the doorway, dressed in his scrubs and watching her with his fathomless eyes. Jade quickly stood and went to him, obediently kissing Kuai on the lips; her entire body on edge because she always needed to be on edge with her husband.

"You're home early," Jade said. "I thought I'd have time to paint before you got here. I'm sorry, I haven't made dinner yet, I -"

Kuai shushed her with a gentle finger on her lips, smiling a little now.

"I came home early so I could take you out to dinner," he explained, pulling Jade close and kissing her neck softly. "Would you like that?"

"O-of course, but why? It isn't a special occasion," Jade replied, allowing Kuai to kiss along her throat without protest; not that she would ever protest her husband.

Kuai shrugged, sharp teeth nipping at Jade's skin.

"I felt like making it a special occasion, so," he smirked, looking down at Jade in the oversized shirt and her legs bare. Desire flared in his eyes, making Jade's heartbeat increase. "But first, let's go to the bedroom. You know I can't resist you when you're working on your little paintings."

Jade suddenly became aware that Kuai was slowly unbuttoning the shirt, exposing her tan skin to the sunlight glimmering through the studio's windows.

"I'll be waiting," Kuai said, kissing Jade's neck one last time and opening her shirt completely; large hands sliding over bruises still lingering on Jade's skin. "Don't be too long."

He turned and left, not bothering to look back. Jade watched him disappear down the hall and then stood for just a moment, shirt hanging open and the dust motes dancing in shafts of light. She wasn't particularly in the mood for sex, but when had that ever mattered?

Rubbing her hand across her eyes, Jade turned back to the canvas and slowly picked up a can of red paint, her hand trembling slightly as she raised it.

"Well, at least it isn't the basement," she whispered, heart racing as she swung the can and drenched the canvas; streaks of paint falling in trails like fresh bloodshed along the white.


	4. Chapter 4

_ Dear diary, _

_ Hey, it's me again. (I don't know why I wrote that. Of course, it's me, who else would be writing in you? You're a one-woman diary, aren't you? Unless diaries can be sluts in which case - wait, what the fuck am I talking about? I've barely started and I'm already getting away from my point.) _

_ I swear I have a point, diary, let me just try to think of it. _

_ Oh, yes, that's right. I wanted to talk to you about classical music and why I hate it so much. Okay, maybe I don't hate it but it does scare me. It was playing the first time Kuai hurt me, and now it always runs through my mind whenever he starts to...lose control of himself. _

_ Although, it's odd. I don't really think he loses control of himself when he does what he does. If anything, he's the sort of person who's always in control. Of everything. Including me. I think that's why we've had so much difficulty over the years, diary. If you'd known me before I'd been with Kuai you would understand. I was a different person a long time ago, but I've changed...maybe not completely, but enough so that I don't really recognize myself anymore. I'm really not sure if that's a good thing. It's really hard for me to judge myself and my situation...I guess I'm just too deep in it, you know? It's hard to assess your own life while you're living it, or rather, trying to survive it. _

_ But, yes, I was a different person, diary. Once upon a time, I had a lot of plans for myself. I wanted to be an actuary and I wanted to travel, too. I wanted to see the whole world and I wanted to be in love with someone who loved me back. _

_ Don't be like that, diary. Don't be like that, Jade. Kuai does love me. He does. Why else did he come home early last night to take me out to Campobello Bistro for absolutely no reason at all? Why did he buy the most expensive champagne on the menu and tell me that I looked nice, that he couldn't believe that I belonged to him? _

_ I wanted to think that's sweet, diary. I mean, I do think it's sweet, but it also makes me think and that's always a dangerous thing, isn't it? To think too much? _

_ I belong to him. This is the truth. He doesn't view me as a partner so much as an acquisition. Kuai likes to own things, and people, it would seem. I'm not sure how I feel about that. I suppose I could live with it a little easier if the basement didn't exist...if Kuai's temper was just a little longer, more forgiving. _

_ But, I digress, back to the classical music. I can't say I was ever a huge fan of it, but I didn't mind it, you know? Kuai, on the other hand, loves it, so we listen to it all the time. Chopin, mostly. He can't get enough of his nocturnes, and I can't say that I blame him. They're frenzied and gorgeous and sad and slightly violent... _

_ God, they're a lot like Kuai, aren't they? Tumultuous and unpredictable, but they have the capability of being so unbearably sweet. _

_ Like I said, classical music was playing the first time I caught a glimpse of Kuai's...other side. Yes, that's what we'll call it, for lack of a better term. The side that only I get to see, I guess. How lucky am I? _

_ We hadn't been dating very long, just a few months actually, but I'd already really started to fall for him, you know? It's strange, we'd never been close as kids or teenagers, but after we met up again after becoming adults, there was just something about him. It drew me in, diary, almost like he'd become irresistible. There's something to be said for someone with confidence and drive and just an edge; a personality that clearly states that it knows what it wants. Kuai had always been so stoic and short on words, and he still was when we started dating, but his quiet nature wasn't off-putting...in my head it made me think of still water that runs deep. It gave me the impression that if I dug deep enough, Kuai would have so much to offer. _

_ And he does, I just didn't realize that for all the good things he has to give, there are so many bad things to come along as well...whether I want them or not. _

_ Anyway, as I recall it, and you must forgive me because time and injury have made my mind a fuzzy place, but I'll tell you what I can recollect. We were in bed at the time in Kuai's little apartment. He was still in residency at South Peninsula and I was visiting him for the weekend, and we'd spent most of our time in bed, even though I still wouldn't let him, well, you know. I remember getting a call, and when I looked at my phone, I guess I looked really happy, so he asked me who it was. I told him it was Kung Lao and that I was happy because I hadn't heard from him in a while, what with him having gotten married to Kitana recently. _

_ I can just remember this strange look coming over Kuai's face like he kind of temporarily stepped out of his body. Do you know what I mean? That blank quality people get when they're trying to process something, or they can't believe what they're seeing or hearing? I guess you could describe Kuai's eyes as being cold most of the time, but at that moment they looked...remote? Yes, that's the word. I didn't recognize him for a moment, but I brushed it off. Why wouldn't I? It was just a phone call, after all. _

_ I told him that I'd be right back and went to get out of bed, but Kuai...he grabbed me. He grabbed me really hard. I know this is strange, but I can recall gasping because it hurt so much and because I was so surprised. He wrapped his fingers around my arm and squeezed, and when I tried to pull away his fingers just got tighter. I told him he was hurting me and to stop, that I needed to answer the call but he wouldn't let go. _

_ What's crazy is that even though he was hurting me, the remote look kind of left his eyes when I spoke up, and then he just looked sad, almost apologetic. He still held onto me but he loosened his grip, not enough for me to break away, but enough so that he wasn't hurting me anymore. He just seemed so melancholy at that moment, and I couldn't figure out what had changed so quickly, and just because of Kung Lao calling me. I'll never forget what he said next, diary...to this day, I'll remember every word because it was just so unexpected: _

_ "You love him, don't you?" _

_ It was by that time that my phone had stopped ringing and the call went to voicemail. It was silent in his apartment because a new nocturne was readying to play, and I could hear the little 'ping' sound when a message was left, but I couldn't even think about listening to it at the time. I just couldn't believe what Kuai had asked me. _

_ Let me be honest with you, diary (I mean, I have to be honest with someone, don't I? You're all I have!) I may have harbored deeper feelings for Lao when we were teenagers, but I always knew that Lao didn't like me because he wanted Kitana. I never pushed him, I never approached him...I guess you could say I loved him from afar, but I never once told anyone what I felt. What was the point? It's not like I could do anything with the feelings anyway. Eventually, they died down and became bearable.  _

_ I'd never given Kuai any indication that I had romantic feelings for Lao in any capacity, so I don't know why he asked me that. I don't know why he grabbed me like that. I still don't get it, diary, and I've been hashing this shit out for years now. _

_ I told Kuai that I didn't love Lao like that, that I cared for him like a best friend. Kuai still looked so sad, but there was something else in his expression that I just couldn't read. I realize now that it was his anger rearing its head, I just couldn't see the signs back then. He was thinking. He was plotting. _

_ He was waiting. _

_ Afterward, he did calm down and he apologized for what he did, and I forgave him, of course. He explained that he'd developed stronger feelings for me than he'd anticipated and he just felt a little jealous and that it was a knee-jerk reaction. I told him not to worry about it...that I understood, but I didn't, not really. I can remember him being extra sweet for the rest of my trip, and he even took me to a really nice restaurant even though residents make so little (in comparison to what they make when they're fully licensed, of course). He wined and dined me (although, unlike Alanis, he did not 69 me, diary. Sorry, that was my lame attempt at humor) and made me believe what had occurred was just a fluke. _

_ Of course, it wasn't, but you already know that. Throughout the entire scenario, Chopin's Ballade No. 1 in G minor could be heard, frantic piano music being played by Kuai's favorite pianist (Arthur Rubinstein), and it filled up my head. Now, whenever we go to the basement or Kuai has an attack of temper, I hear that discordant music play and it fills me with so much terror. _

_ The bruises on my arm didn't show up until a day or so later after I'd already flown back to Alaska and left Kuai behind on the east coast. I caught sight of them in that horrible caustic light that comes with early morning when all of your secrets are laid bare and you have to face them. Instead of facing them, I ignored them, though. It wasn't too long after that that Kuai asked me to move in with him, and I did. I moved into that tiny apartment and played house with him until he finished his residency. _

_ But you, diary. Well, I bought you right after those bruises appeared. And we've been together ever since, you and I... _

_...and Kuai, of course. _

_ Whoops, there's Erron calling to me for help...I better go. This was getting a little heavy-handed anyway, don't you think? _

_ Forever and Always, _

_ Your Jade _

_ PS: Do you think I should give you a nickname like Anne Frank gave her diary, Kitty? I always thought that was really nice but I can never think of a name...I guess I'll have to marinate on that, won't I? _

_ PPS: Wait never mind. I thought I wanted to say something else but I forgot...it'll come to me later, I'm sure. (Isn't that always how it goes?) _

\---------

"Does this look alright?"

Jade glanced up from her diary as she shut it slowly, her mind coming back to the present after becoming bogged down in the past; the strange, muddled past. Erron was staring at him, grey eyes bright with anxiety as he worried his hands. He was busy trying to hang up the photographs that Jade had framed, the lonely lighthouse among them, black and white waves crashing behind it in violent streams. Standing, she came over to study Erron's efforts.

"It looks good," she said, moving to adjust one of the pictures that were slightly askew. She looked for the lighthouse picture and picked it up, gazing at it for what felt like the millionth time in the last few days. "Where are you going to put this one? I think it's the best in the collection."

Erron shrugged, the anxiety still registering in his eyes as he looked at the picture. He was still the nervous little thing he'd been in childhood, albeit a little plumper, and with a tad more backbone, but not much more. Jade enjoyed working with him for the simple fact that there was nothing to fear in Erron, what you saw was what you got, and she knew the guy would never hurt a fly, let alone another person unless he had to.

"Why don't you hang it up, Jade? You always have such an eye for these things," Erron said, smiling a little. He ran a hand through his hair and regarded Jade with an odd sort of reverence she didn't feel she entirely deserved, not if Kuai was to be believed.

"Well, okay. Why not?" Jade glanced at the wall, at the other photographs that spoke of wild, out-of-the-way places she could only dream of, and she instantly decided this picture needed to be in the center of it all. She was just glad that the pictures were being hung right across from her workstation, where she could still gaze at the pretty, otherworldly slices of a life she could never hope to live.

"Right there," she murmured, hanging the picture right in the middle and standing back to admire it. She was silent for a moment, mind wandering and taking her far from that gallery, far from Fairbanks, far from everything.

"Gosh, they sure are pretty, aren't they?" Erron asked, breaking into Jade's reverie.

Jade nodded, swimming upward from flights of fancy. She looked at each of the pictures, in turn, a small detail she'd noticed before jumping out at her again.

"There aren't any signatures on any of them," she commented, pulling out her phone and checking the time. It was nearly time for her to leave. "Don't you think that's odd, Erron?"

"I suppose," Erron shrugged. "Kitana said they came in the mail a while ago, no note or nothing. She just figured they were an anonymous donation or something."

"But, still," Jade said, eyes drifting once again to the lighthouse. Where was it located? "To take such wonderful pictures and not ask for recognition or money. It's so strange."

"You don't sign your paintings, Jade," Erron pointed out, making Jade grin.

"Why should I? No one needs to know my name," Jade said, softly. She reached out and brushed a finger over the lighthouse. "Maybe the person who took these is a kindred spirit or something."

Erron stared at her for a moment, still worrying his hands. Glancing at his watch, he nervously tapped Jade, pulling her from her thoughts.

"Jade, it's already 4:10. Don't you need to get out of here? I know how punctual you like to be getting home." He looked at her with admiration. "You're so good to Kuai, always home on time to make supper. He's lucky to have you."

"Oh, shit. You're right," Jade said, hurriedly turning away and deciding to ignore Erron's comments. If he only knew. Walking to her corner, she grabbed up her bag, making sure to stuff her diary in the secret pocket she'd created in the side.

"I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" She said, practically running for the exit. She needed to be home by 4:30, no question.

"Bye, Jade!" Erron called, going back to hanging the pretty photographs, a smile faltering a little as Jade rushed outside into the bright, summer sunshine.

"If I hit all green lights and the traffic is light, I should have more than enough time," Jade muttered to herself as she slid behind the wheel of her silver Lexus, a birthday present from Kuai from just a few months ago. She'd hardly believed her eyes when her husband had led her outside and revealed the beautiful car, a giant red bow adorning its hood. Kuai had just smiled and kissed Jade's temple, telling her she was worth more than all the cars in the world to him.

Jade found herself becoming warm at the memory until she went to turn the key and nothing happened. She tried again, still nothing.

"No, no, this can't be happening," she said, trying to start the car yet again and still garnering no response. "Fuck!" She slammed her hands down on the steering wheel, feeling the stirrings of a panic attack coursing in her chest; heartbeat rising as her palms began to sweat.

"Maybe I can call him," she whispered, picking up her phone and staring at it. "I'm sure he'll understand. I'm sure -"

But, no. That wouldn't do. That would never do. Jade knew this, knew this as surely as the sun would rise tomorrow. If he got to see it, of course. Frantically, she tried to race through her options. She had limited knowledge of cars, but she wouldn't be surprised if it was simply the battery had died, so she just needed a jump. But who could jump it? She could ask Erron or Kitana but she didn't want to alarm them with her growing hysteria.

Maybe she could call a cab? Or an Uber?

"No, that would take fucking forever," she said, hating the tears that started plucking at the corners of her eyes. Fighting them back, she picked up her bag and got out of the car, shading her eyes against the harsh sunlight filtering down in yellow streaks. It was at that moment that she decided to just walk, no, run home. Jade couldn't imagine being still in that moment, anyway, not with her anxiety on the rise and her fear almost strangling her. No, she needed to be moving, and quickly.

She started down the road, breaking into an awkward jog before she began running outright, her heels slapping the pavement and her breaths already coming fast. She was hardly dressed for exercise, having worn his normal gallery attire of a dress, heels on her feet. She hadn't made it very far before she was slowing down to take quick, ragged breaths.

"I'm never going to make it," she whimpered, sweat coursing down her face and salting her lips. "I'm going to be late and then...and then...."

She shook her head. Better not to think of such things at this juncture. The basement was always present in her mind, its clinical aspects stark in her thoughts, but she didn't want to think of it while standing in the strong sunshine. Darkness like that didn't match up with a summer's day. Feeling her strength beginning to fail her, residual soreness from so many old injuries dragging her down, Jade didn't have it in her to run, so she began to walk as quickly as she could; the cars rushing along the road beside her. A warm breeze kicked up and ruffled her hair, cooling her sweaty face.

_ I'll make him something really delicious for dinner, _ she thought, keeping her eyes on the ground.  _ Maybe that'll make things okay. Maybe then... _

Jade wanted to cry but she wouldn't let herself. Not out here, not in front of God and everyone. She almost had to laugh at that thought, though. God? Where the fuck was He, anyway? Where has he been while he'd ignored Jade's suffering for all these years?

_ Oh, get a grip, drama queen, _ she chastised herself.  _ You're hardly suffering just because you fight with your husband on occasion. There are plenty of people out there that have it much worse. You know this. _

She was in the process of telling her chattering, nagging brain to shut the fuck up when all of a sudden a black pickup stopped along the side of the road, blocking her path. Instant wariness overtook Jade and she stopped in her tracks, fearful of what was about to happen. Why would anyone stop? She wasn't a hitchhiker, had given no indication that she was looking or hoping for a ride. Her apprehension really ramped up when the truck's door opened, and a leg appeared, clad in jeans and a dress shoe on its foot. Then another leg appeared, and a tall, lean man was getting out, hair appearing dark until the sun-splashed over it, turning it to burnished black.

Jade stopped in her tracks and held her bag in front of herself, fearful and looking around for an escape, but she was surrounded by the road on one side and a ditch on the other. The driver had angled his car just so and made it so Jade would have to wade through tall grass and briars to go around. The only option to her was turning back, and she sure as hell wasn't going to do that. Her fear of her husband outweighed any fear she might have had for this forward stranger.

"I-I don't need a ride but thanks anyway," Jade stammered out as the man started toward her, looking almost like a panther in his black t-shirt; his sinewy muscles glowing under his tanned skin. For a moment, Jade found herself staring at them, at the tattoos winding their way around the man's arms, but she stopped, berating herself for looking at someone other than Kuai Liang.

The man didn't respond as he advanced, and finally Jade was able to lift her eyes enough to study the stranger's face, a familiar pair of brown eyes looking back at her, a smile from the past pulling her backward through the years. She just stared, transfixed and disbelieving.

"Liu?" She breathed, still clutching her bag like a lifeline. "Liu Kang, is that you?"

The man pulled a hand through his wind-roughened hair and his grin grew, stopping for a moment and just gazing at Jade like she was a newly discovered creature. After a few seconds, he laughed, and it was as bright as the sunshine pouring over the both of them.

"I thought I recognized that braid," he said, his voice husky, possibly from smoking but who could say? Jade hadn't seen him in years. He peered at Jade, studying her.

"If you don't need a ride then why are you walking out here in those nice clothes? And in 90-degree heat. Cut the crap, Jade."

Jade recoiled at Liu Kang's direct words. What could he possibly say? Liu spoke the truth, had always had a habit of shooting from the hip.

"You got me," he conceded, smiling as well. "I do need a ride, but I don't want to bother you, so -"

She started to walk but Jade grabbed her by the arm, making Jade wince involuntarily as the man's fingers pressed against a healing bruise.

"Hold up, where are you headed?" He asked, loosening his grip but keeping his hand on Jade's arm. "There's no way I'm going to make you walk, Jade. Get in the truck and I'll drive you."

"N-no, you don't have to do that, Liu. Really, I'm fine," Jade replied, trying to pull away unsuccessfully.

Liu chuckled and dropped Jade's arm.

"You always were so fucking stubborn," he sighed. "Just get in the truck, okay? Do it for me. I won't be able to look at myself in the mirror if I let you go back to walking. Besides, you look like you're about to keel over, and -"

He reached out and tapped Jade's cheek, making her flush and flinch at the same time.

"You're getting a sunburn," he laughed. "Now come on. I won't take no for an answer."

Jade still hesitated, desperately wanting to accept the ride but terrified of the offer. The whole situation was grossly unfair. Kuai demanded she be home by a certain time but he would also be infuriated if Jade accepted a ride from another guy, even if it was an old friend.

"I don't know, Liu," Jade finally said, hating the hitch in her voice. "I just -"

"Jade, what's wrong?" Liu Kang asked, looking at her even closer now. "You're acting weird like you're scared or something." He stopped, frowning. "Are you scared of me? Seriously?"

"No, of course not! God, I don't fucking know what to do!"

Liu softened and gestured to the truck, his entire stance suggesting warmth and safety. Or maybe that's just what Jade wanted to see? She dropped her eyes to the ground and tried to think pure, rational thoughts; the same thoughts she tried to conjure up while in the basement.

"Just let me give you a ride, okay? Please, Jade. It isn't that big a deal."

_ But, it is. It is! You just don't see it! _

"Fine, sure," Jade finally gave in, stalking toward the truck. "If I'm going to Hell, I might as well be driven there."

*******

"Where are you and Liang living nowadays?" Liu asked, adjusting the vents so the air conditioning poured over Jade, reviving her somewhat.

"Oh, up near Jax’s place, in the estates," Jade replied, leaning against the seat and trying to appear calm, though on the inside she was falling apart. "Just drive in that direction and I'll guide you once we get closer."

Liu whistled, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a pack of cigarettes. Deftly, he slid one out, produced a lighter from the middle console, and lit it, throwing the pack and the lighter in a cup holder. Sucking on the cigarette, he blew some smoke out the window where it faded into the sunshine.

"Liang must be doing pretty well for himself, getting you guys a place up that way," he replied, turning up the air so it blew stronger against Jade's sweaty skin. "Are you cool enough? I can turn it up more."

"No, that's okay. I'm fine," Jade assured her, smiling at the tiny gesture. She frowned when Liu's cigarette smoke drifted toward her, though. "Um, do you have to smoke, Liu, I -"

"Yeah, I know it's an awful habit. I keep meaning to quit," Liu cut her off, taking another drag before grinding out the cigarette and tucking it behind his ear. "Sorry."

Jade just nodded, not wanting to tell Liu that she was more concerned about Kuai smelling the smoke on her, but she kept quiet. Instead, she groped for something to ask Liu Kang.

"Where have you been?" She blurted out, flushing a little at the forcefulness of her tone. It had been so long since she'd had the opportunity to just sit down and talk with one of her old friends; especially Liu.

"Around," Liu Kang said vaguely. He didn't offer up additional information so Jade let it go. Something Liu had said jumped out at her.

"Kuai is doing well, by the way," she said, softly. "He's one of the top heart surgeons at Fairbanks. I'm really proud of him."

Liu snorted a little.

"Is that so? I always thought it was odd that Liang would want to work with hearts, considering he doesn't have one to begin with."

Jade was startled at his words, having never expected them. Liu Kang had never been especially close to Kuai, but he almost sounded like he actively disliked him.

"What?" She asked, toying with the strap of her bag, almost feeling afraid that Kuai would find out someone else was talking shit about him. But that was crazy, right?

"Nothing, don't mind me," Liu replied, turning the truck and coming upon the cluster of estates where the upper echelon of Fairbanks called home. "Okay, man. Start directing me here."

"Um, take a left here," Jade said, pointing. "And then take your first right. Yes, that's us. Right there."

Pulling her bag onto her shoulder, Jade placed her hand on the door handle, ready and waiting to jump out as soon as Liu stopped the truck in front of the ornate black gates standing between the road and her home.

"Wait," Liu Kang said, taking hold of Jade's arm again and detaining her. Jade looked back at him fearfully, her eyes drifting to Liu's hand gripping her skin. She looked up at him, her entire face awash with questions.

"I'm going to be in town for a while. Did you want to get together? It's been so long, you know?"

Just the suggestion produced raw terror in Jade's heart, but she kept her face passive.

"Sure, that sounds nice," she smiled. "Let's talk about it later, okay? I really have to go." Almost losing her composure, Jade wrestled with the door until it finally opened, and she got out, forcing Liu to relinquish her arm.

"Can I just stop by here?" Liu called, cocking an eyebrow. "You didn't even give me your number or anything."

"No!" Jade replied, louder than she'd intended. She backtracked when she saw the surprise registering in Liu Kang's eyes.

"I mean, just stop by my work," she said, trying to remain calm. "I'm there almost every day."

She turned, trying to nonchalantly sprint to her home. She stopped when she heard Liu calling out to her. She looked over her shoulder.

"Where do you work? I might need to know that if I'm going to come by," Liu laughed, leaning across the cab of the truck.

"Oh, right," Jade replied, feeling stupid as she brushed wayward hair from her eyes. "I work at the art gallery downtown. You can't miss it, it's the only one in Fairbanks."

Without offering further information, Jade ran up to the gates and punched the passcode in, nervously tapping her foot as they slowly swung open. Glancing back, she saw Liu still sitting there, watching her. She waved and darted inside the parted gates, vaguely aware of the sound of a truck pulling off behind her. She was still reeling from seeing Liu again, and slightly aggravated that he hadn't offered up more details about where he'd been, but she waved those thoughts away. Right now she needed to focus on getting inside and calling Kuai, then she needed to -

She stopped abruptly when she saw a familiar black Audi R8 sitting in the circular driveway, its paint glossed to a high shine and almost looking like an instrument of torture in the blazing sun; Kuai's car.

But that couldn't be, could it? Kuai was working the later shift today, she'd had a case scheduled for 5 pm that was supposed to last at least 2 hours. Jade slowly walked toward the house, sudden nausea flaring in her stomach. Before she could even make it to the door, it flew open, and Kuai was standing there. Jade stopped to see her, to see the look in his eyes; that awful, remote look she'd seen so many times before. She was also aware of a Chopin nocturne drifting out of the house and wafting around her.

"Well, you're on time, Jade, but," Kuai said, turning his neck a little and making it pop. "But I see you didn't drive yourself home. Now, why is that?"

"Kuai, my car died, so I had to -"

"Get in the house," Kuai said, calmly. Too calmly. "We'll talk about this inside, okay?"

He turned away, leaving Jade to shiver even as copious amounts of sunshine poured over her like syrup; chills coursing through her even in the face of a 90-degree day.


	5. Chapter 5

_ Dear diary, _

_ Sorry, I still can't think of a name for you. I'd like to think that most things seem to name themselves, but I'm at a loss when it comes to you. It's times like this I wish my mother had been more open about me having pets as a kid, I could've had practice naming things, but I wasn't even allowed to have a fucking goldfish, so... _

_ Anyway, once again I'm going off on a tangent (what else is new?) and that's an issue because I really don't have a lot of time to write. Kuai is in the shower and my hands have finally stopped shaking enough so that I can actually write. _

_ You may be surprised but I'm actually exceedingly grateful right now diary. When Kuai caught me getting a ride home from someone else I thought for sure I'd be spending the rest of the evening in the basement, but he was lenient this time (which is more than I deserve, honestly. What was I even thinking getting into Liu's truck? I must be out of my fucking mind!) He only made me kneel on rice this time, and not for very long either; only an hour. I mean, I had to give him a...well, I had to 'service' him too, if you know what I mean. I really don't like getting into those sorts of gritty details when I write in you diary, but I think you can figure out what Kuai made me do while I was on my knees. _

_ The rice typically isn't that bad, so long as I can go to the special place in my mind that helps me forget where I am. I call it my garden and it's usually pretty easy to get to, especially when I've transcended the initial terror and I'm in the middle of the punishment, you know? I'm sure I'm not making a whole lot of sense but trust me, my garden has saved my ass more times than I can count. It's almost like another world inside my brain...a world where the wind always smells like perfume and the sky is that perfect pinky orange that comes with a tropical sunset. Just think of the sun going down beyond the ocean and there's palm trees rustling...that's kind of what it's like. And you know what's really nice about it? The nocturnes can't follow me there, diary; it's blissfully silent save for the wind. _

_ I guess Kuai decided to take it easy on me because I was able to explain what happened with my car and, well, I kind of sort of lied to him. _

_ Just hear me out, diary, before you start judging me, okay? _

_ The great thing about our driveway is that it's super long, so Kuai couldn't see who dropped me off, just Liu Kang's black truck. I told him that a nice older woman saw me walking along the side of the road and offered to drive me the rest of the way. He still wasn't happy that I'd accepted a ride from a stranger (he told me that's a great way to become a lampshade in someone's apartment) but at least I could get him to calm down a little...but of course, I still needed to be punished, which I can understand. I mean, Kuai has made his rules pretty clear, hasn't he? Really, when will I ever learn? _

_ But, gosh, it was nice seeing Liu again, diary. I haven't seen him since Lao's wedding almost 6 years ago. He was the best man and it was bizarre seeing him in a tux, but he pulled it off, you know? He needed a haircut but the pictures turned out fine. Wait, there I go, off on another tangent. _

_ The remarkable thing about Liu is that he has kind of this...timeless quality, you know what I mean? Sure, I saw some little laugh lines next to his eyes and he seemed a bit thinner than the last time I saw him but other than that, he was just the same Liu. Although, I think he may have started working out, and he definitely had a few new tattoos on his arms. _

_ Wait, why did I even notice that? And I have to be fucking demented to write Liu Kang's name in this diary, but I have so many hiding places I highly doubt Kuai is ever going to find you, diary. Besides, everyone needs secrets, don't they? Kuai is very much against me having a private life to myself, but what he doesn't know won't hurt me, right? _

_ I can only wonder about where Liu has been. After Kung Lao's wedding he kind of disappeared. We were Facebook friends until Kuai made me get rid of mine, and I had his number in my phone for years until that too was purged by the Liang Inquisition. Liu was always kind of short on words so I'm not surprised he didn't go into details when I asked him where he'd been, but he could've given me something, don't you think? _

_ I did something profoundly stupid, too, by the way (right, I know. what else is new?). I told Liu where I work and I told him it was okay for him to stop by. What was I thinking? I must have been - _

_ Hold on. I heard the shower stop. I have to go. _

_ Forever and Always, _

_ Your Jade _

_ PS: I'll keep ruminating about a nickname for you, okay? _

_ PPS: Goddamn, my knees hurt - but I can still go to work tomorrow! That's a plus, right? _

\-----

Jade hurriedly tucked the diary under the mattress before Kuai could see what he was doing, making a mental note to retrieve it after her husband had gone to sleep so she could slip it back into her messenger bag. Kuai emerged from the bathroom, shirtless and clad in grey pajama pants, a towel thrown around his neck. He continued to dry his hair as he watched Jade, who was laid across the bed in only her pajamas, trying not to move so she wouldn't aggravate the wounds on her knees; a riot of tiny rice-shaped cuts speckled across her skin.

"I'll clean those up," Kuai said, throwing the towel in the hamper and coming over to Jade's side, his lean torso illuminated by the bedside lamp. Leaning down, he gave Jade a quick peck on the forehead, his large hand lingering on his cheek for a moment. "How are you feeling?"

Jade shrugged a little, leaning into Kuai's hand and kissing the palm softly.

"It hurts," she said, voice subdued and docile. "But I'll be okay."

"I'm sure you will be," Kuai replied, pulling away and sliding open the drawer of the bedside table. He methodically pulled out peroxide, cotton balls, and antibiotic cream, as well as bandages and gauze. "Really, this is pretty tame, all things considered. I still can't believe you got into a stranger's car, Jade. You're just asking for trouble. I would've come to get you."

"I know but I didn't know you were home," Jade said, softly, wincing a little as Kuai dragged a peroxide-saturated cotton ball across her knee; the wounds bubbling up slightly. "And I was just so focused on making sure I made it back on time...I guess I wasn't thinking straight."

"Hmm." Kuai's eyebrows narrowed as he continued to attend to Jade, first with the stinging peroxide and then by dabbing small amounts of the cream over her knees, its coolness providing much-needed comfort. Finally, he wrapped her knees with layers of gauze, Jade's eyes following the movement of the bandages as Kuai wound it round and round.

"There," he murmured, patting Jade's knees softly and dropping a kiss on top of each of them. "Doesn't that feel better?" He grinned at Jade, almost appearing boyish.

Jade nodded his head and managed to smile back, a sickening feeling welling in her belly for a number of reasons. She always felt weird during these sessions, the aftermath of the punishment, when Kuai came back to himself and cared for Jade so tenderly. He always seemed so happy while doing it, almost like he was in his element, and Jade had to wonder if Kuai didn't get off on putting her back together after systematically attempting to break her down. The other thing that disturbed her was how much she actually enjoyed being doted on by her husband like this, the little kisses, the gentle hands, the soft, kind eyes...

"You're calling out of work tomorrow, right?" Kuai suddenly asked, putting away the first aid supplies on Jade's bedside table. They had started keeping them there, always at hand, about a year or so after they'd moved in; just in case. "There's no way you can walk around all day with your knees like that."

The sickening sensation intensified in Jade's belly when Kuai said this, but for a much different reason. She knew she had to tread carefully, lest she suffer through round two. There had been nights where Kuai had punished her up to five or more times, and she just didn't have it in her to endure such a trial.

"I-I actually still wanted to go," she said, meekly; eyes drifting away so she didn't have to see how her husband's face changed when he heard Jade's response. "Kitana's really cool about me kind of staying in one place when I'm not...feeling well." She winced at the words, supremely disturbed that her employer had to make long-standing concessions due to her many physical limitations.

Kuai was silent for a while, the only sound in the room the classical music playing softly in the background; another Chopin nocturne. Jade's stomach clenched and she hurriedly sat up, biting back a groan when she knelt in front of Kuai; knees aching terribly. Kuai just stared at her, eyes far away and inscrutable as he watched Jade, still sitting on the floor next to the bed.

"But I'll do whatever you want me to do," Jade said, reaching out her arms and wrapping them around Kuai's neck. Usually, affection helped to appease her husband, the more intimacy the better; it seemed to somewhat gentle him, as did outright capitulation. "Just don't be mad, okay?"

Kuai Liang sighed and wound his arms around Jade's waist, pulling her close as he lay his head against her shoulder. Jade could feel warm lips being pressed against her neck.

"I'm not mad, Jade," Kuai murmured, continuing to languidly kiss her. "I was just worried, you know? I saw you getting out of a stranger's truck and I was terrified. They could've taken you away from me, they could've -"

He stopped, hugging Jade even closer.

"Just promise me you won't do that again, okay? If you need a ride, just call me. If I'm not in the middle of a procedure, I'll pick up; I promise. Hell, even if I'm with a patient, I'll step out of the room and take your call. Do you understand?"

Jade just nodded, sinking into Kuai's affections and concern, desperately wishing it could be like this always. Whenever her husband was so loving she could forget about the dark basement, and would forgive her for absolutely anything. Once again, she had to wonder how Kuai could be such an enigma to her; so kind on the one hand and so monstrous on the other...she just never knew what to expect.

"I'll have to drive you," Kuai said, still kissing along Jade's throat, nipping teeth, making her gasp lightly. "I wonder what's wrong with your car. It just wouldn't start?"

Jade shook her head, easing off of her aching knees and away from Kuai's embrace. She expected this to annoy her husband but Kuai just draped his hands on Jade's waist, pressing slightly.

"I think it's the battery," she said.

"Did you leave the lights on again?" Kuai groaned, rolling his eyes. He reached up and rubbed Jade's hair, tousling his hair. "When are you going to learn, baby? And why would you try to walk home when it was so hot today, you know you don't handle the heat very well."

_ I didn't want to piss you off. _

"I panicked," Jade replied, simply. It was partially the truth, at any rate.

"Why didn't you take your medication?" Kuai asked, cocking a brow. "You have Klonopin, just for that very reason." He sighed. "Maybe you should just stop working. I've noticed it's not helping with your stress levels at all."

Jade reached out and pressed her hands to Kuai's chest before she could stop herself, her eyes wide.

"No, no," she said. "I'm fine, I promise. Please, don't make me quit, okay? I need that job, I need to go there every day, I need -"

_ I need to feel somewhat normal sometimes. _

Kuai regarded her with suspicion for a moment, but then he softened a little; the ice in his eyes melting. He took one of Jade's hands in his own and kissed it softly.

"I get it," he said. "You want to feel like you're contributing, don't you? Jade, don't you realize just being here and taking care of things, of me, is doing more than enough? It's all I've ever wanted from the person I love." He looked at Jade, his eyes darkening back into the remoteness again; briefly.

"Doesn't that make you happy, Jade? Taking care of me?"

Jade could only pray that her husband didn't notice the minute tremors beginning to quake her flesh, but she kept her voice steady when she answered:

"Of course it does, Kuai," she practically whispered, looking down at her hands. "You're right, I just want to feel like I'm giving something back to you...you've already given me so much; more than I deserve."

Softly, Kuai placed a finger under Jade's chin and tipped her head back, forcing her to meet his gaze. Thankfully, he was smiling.

"You're so sweet and good," he murmured, leaning forward and kissing Jade's cheeks. "That's why I got you a surprise."

"Surprise?"

Kuai nodded, looking overwhelmingly pleased with himself.

"Well, I remembered how much you wanted to see Hamilton, so I got us tickets to go see it in Anchorage next month. What do you think? Does that make you happy, too?"

He waited, face awash in boyish joy; looking so young and innocent it made Jade's heartache. She bit her lip, trying to stop it from trembling.

"Yes, very happy," Jade said, smiling genuinely now. How could she help herself when Kuai was being so sweet? "You didn't have to do that, Kuai."

"I know," Kuai replied, coming to lay on the bed and pulling Jade down against his chest; settling her head right over his steadily beating heart. He ran his hand through Jade's hair slowly. "But I wanted to. Besides, it's been a while since we've gone away. I thought we could stay at a hotel, too. A really nice place."

"That'd be nice." Jade laid her hand flat against Kuai's taut skin, almost mustering up a modicum of desire. If her husband stayed like this, she might want to make love that night, though her husband preferred rougher, darker thrills; pain and gasping breaths, handcuffs flashing and Jade begging.

"What's your favorite song again? I can never remember," Kuai said, voice hushed.

_ Helpless, _ Jade thought, but she didn't want Kuai to know that.  _ It was too personal. _

"Satisfied," she said, sinking into the sound of her husband's whooshing heartbeats, flush against her ear; the wild scents of his shower gel practically putting Jade to sleep.

"Sing a little for me," Kuai said, winding a hair around his finger. "You have the cutest voice."

"No, I don't," Jade said, flushing hotly. She always felt shy when Kuai put her on the spot like this.

There was a sharp tug on her Kuai and Jade knew Kuai wasn't really giving her an option. She cleared her throat and began to sing softly, feeling foolish and exposed.

_ "A toast to the groom, _

_ To the bride! _

_ From your sister _

_ Who is always by your side _

_ To your union _

_ And the hope that you provide _

_ May you always... _

_ Be satisfied." _

"See? So cute," Kuai said, grinning while continuing to stroke Jade's hair; softly now. Jade flushed hotter at the compliment, though she couldn't help being a little pleased, too. She always was when her husband paid her a compliment, though she wasn't appreciative of being forced to perform at a whim.

"That raises a good question," Kuai continued, stroking a hand down Jade's back and slipping her finger under the waistband of her boxer briefs.

"Hmm?" Jade asked, raising her head a little to stare at her husband, though she was acutely, painfully aware of Kuai's fingers working her pajamas down. She gritted her teeth.

"Are you?"

Now her pajamas were slipping over her hips, and she wanted to curl up but she didn't dare. Instead, she tried to stay focused on what Kuai was asking him, though she was confused.

"Am I what?"

"Satisfied?" Kuai smirked, gripping Jade's backside, squeezing roughly, and making her yelp.

For a moment, Jade forgot herself, taken aback at Kuai's question as well as his strong fingers pressing into her still-tender flesh; old bruises still healing from her last spanking. Oh, that's right, she'd accidentally burned one of her husband's shirts when she was ironing. Kuai Liang had laughed when he'd turned Jade over his knee, had thought he was being playful, but it had hurt, it had hurt so badly -

"W-what kind of question is that?" Jade gasped as Kuai flipped her onto her back, yanking her pajamas all the way down and tossing them over the side of the bed. Kuai stared at her in a coldly clinical fashion for a moment, almost like Jade was a patient and he was deciding where he should make his first incision.

"A valid one," he replied, reaching over to his bedside table and sliding the drawer open. He rooted around and after a moment produced a set of handcuffs. Slipping them around Jade's wrist, he pulled her arm over her head, wrapped the cuffs around a slat in the headboard, then fastened the other cuff around Jade's free arm. When he was done, Jade's arms were pinned above her head, immobilizing her.

"Now," Kuai said, drifting a finger down Jade's breasts. "Answer the question, baby."

"Satisfied," Jade breathed, closing her eyes because she couldn't bear to look at her husband any longer. He'd been so sweet, so tender, but whenever the handcuffs came out, Jade's mind went to the basement, and now she was scrambling for her garden; desperate for perfumed winds and ocean skies.

"I can already tell I'm losing you, Jade," Kuai said, leaning down and kissing Jade's throat and down over her shoulder blade then her breasts, skilled, surgeon's fingers gripping a delicate hip and tightening; eliciting a small cry from the captive trying to will herself away. "Now answer the fucking question before I lose my temper."

With that, Kuai bit down on Jade's nipple, making her shriek and arch up from the bed, terror arresting her even as fine threads of arousal wound through her blood.

"Yes! Yes!" She screamed, when Kuai bit down on the opposite bit of flesh, strong teeth clamping down and making Jade pant through the agony.

"Yes, what?" Kuai asked, kissing down along Jade's abdomen; his fingers were still gripping Jade's hips and holding her still.

"I-I'm satisfied! Satisfied!" Jade practically cried, tears already building as she threw her head back, Kuai laughing and keeping her in place easily.

"There. Was that so hard?" He asked, shoving his finger inside Jade, a heat growing that filled her with caustic shame. "Hmm, look what else is wet. You kinky minx, Jade; I'm so glad you like it rough."

_ No, I don't...right? Do I actually like this? How crazy am I? _

"Are you going to lay back and think of England while I fuck your brains out, baby?" Kuai asked, getting between Jade's legs and spreading her thighs.

_ No, _ Jade thought, turning her head against the pillow and already beginning to drift.

_ I'm going to go to my garden. _

*******

_ Dear diary, (cont.) _

_ It's 3 am and the moon is right outside my window, practically resting against the glass. It's so pretty I can almost forget about the pain, but not completely. _

_ Kuai held me so tenderly after we... _ _ made love _ _...fucked.  _

_ We fucked, diary. Kuai hasn't made love to me in so long, but he still has the capability of being so soft, I swear. He even got me tickets to see Hamilton, and I know he doesn't give a crap about that show; he did that just for me. _

_ For me. _

_ I'm sitting here and I'm still drifting diary. It always takes me a while to break away from the nocturnes and the garden, but I'm coming around. Kuai is fast asleep and I thank God that he's a deep sleeper. Usually, once he's out, he's out. I should be out, too, but I struggle against the weariness. Kuai even watches me as I take my Ambien, makes sure I swallow it...I'm surprised he doesn't rub my throat to ease the pill down like you would a feisty cat or dog. I'm so tired but I'm fighting diary. I'm always fighting. _

_ Kuai is always chastising me for not taking my anxiety meds, but I don't want to be doped up. I don't want to be in the fog all the time. I'm starting to think Kuai would prefer I always be in the fog, then I'd be more pliable; easier. _

_ But I'm already easy, aren't I? I don't protest him the way I used to. I used to be so strong...I used to stand up to him...I used to fucking say something in my own defense. _

_ When did it all change, diary? Do you know? What was the tipping point? I can't pinpoint the moment it all changed, and I can only figure that it was the culmination of events. I let things slide a few times and eventually it became easier to let everything slide, right? Isn't that how these things usually work? You look away for a moment and when you finally wake up everything's changed, and usually not for the better. _

_ I used to be so passionate, diary. I never let anyone mistreat me, I always tried to do the right thing, for myself and everyone else. _

_ But Kuai changed all that. He kind of...seeped into me like a poison, like heroin, and the highs he could make me feel outweighed the pitfalls, you know what I mean? _

_ God, this is what I get for getting drunk with him at Kung Lao's wedding reception. He just looked so lonely and dejected (handsome, too) sitting there by himself, Skarlet nowhere in sight. _

_ Oh, that's right. We don't talk about Skarlet. We haven't talked about her in years. That's dangerous territory; the killing floor. _

_ But I remember sitting down next to him, already pretty tipsy, and just talking to him, you know? At first I kind of wanted to fuck with him because he'd always been such a prick in school, but he was different somehow. He explained how he was studying to be a doctor and I just felt so - _

_ Helpless. _

_ Yes, helpless. I still feel that way, albeit for a much different reason. _

_ And he suddenly wanted to know everything about me too, diary. It was crazy! He sat there and drank glass after glass of champagne and asked me all about my actuarial exams and college and just....life. He wanted to know all about my life. I can't say that I fell in that moment, but the alcohol and the wedding and seeing Kung Lao finally get hitched to Kitana, well, I guess it put me in a vulnerable place, and I was - _

_ Helpless. _

_ Before I knew it, I was back in Kuai's hotel room and we were kissing and he wanted to  _ _ fuck _ _ make love, but I told him no. I couldn't do that with him, with anyone, until I was absolutely ready. I was a virgin. _

_ Kuai was my first. He's been my only. Can you believe that? _

_ But he didn't pressure me, diary; not that night. That wouldn't come until later. No, that first night we just lay in bed watching old episodes of The Twilight Zone and drinking those tiny bottles of booze in the little fridge...he played with my hair and he kept asking me about myself. It was nice, diary. I felt safe. I felt - _

_ I'm not saying it again. You know how I felt. _

_ Hold on, I think I heard something. I think Kuai's calling for me. I have to go. _

_ (This has certainly been a night of abrupt entries, but I can't let Kuai find me; not with you.) _

_ Good night, _

_ Your Jade _

_ PS: Maybe I should name you Liu? Haha, just kidding. The Ambien is kicking in and it makes me so loopy...I'm surprised I was able to write anything! _

_ PPS: Maybe your name should be Helpless? Nahhh. _


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning: Sexual violence

_Dear diary,_

_Sorry, love, still no name ideas. You know you could help me out...it is your name, after all. Oh, lord, when am I going to break this habit I have of personifying you? Probably never, let's be honest. You're my best friend, aren't you? Possibly the only real one because I can actually be 100% honest with you, and isn't that what true friendship is all about?_

_Anyway, the birds woke me this morning around 6. They were so loud, diary, and I knew they were little buntings. They're so fluffy and cute but god they're so fucking loud. They cut through my brain when they chatter, almost like the nocturnes. They nest in my head and then I can't even think about going back to sleep._

_I wasn't sleeping very well anyway. My sleep is usually pretty disrupted, all things considered. Nightmares and such. My teeth are constantly falling out in my dreams, or I pull on them and they get longer and longer and longer. I've heard that those sorts of dreams are a byproduct of stress and feeling like your life is out of control, but I beg to differ. My life is completely in control, and that's part of the problem._

_Kuai did call out for me last night, diary, but he was asleep when he did it. He sleeps heavily but he's prone to night terrors himself, though we never talk about them. Usually, he holds me in a death grip while we sleep, but last night I was able to slip away and come meet with you. I sat next to the large windows in the living room and watched the moon pass behind the clouds, and I'm doing the same thing now; though the moon has gone to sleep and the sun has taken its place. I like the way the sun catches the clouds on fire, burning them up like red tissue paper...it's all quite romantic._

_I suppose I'm in a romantic mood this morning because I went and visited the garden before I decided to write in you. I'm still feeling very sore and a little dazed, my knees are throbbing and it hurts to walk, but when I went out to see the roses I began to feel better. I like to stand among the bushes and just get lost, feeling the wind pass through and scatter the petals, ruffling my hair. The roses smell like the garden I go to in my brain when Kuai is being savage. It's odd, you wouldn't think the ocean and roses would go together, but it's perfect when it's inside my head. We all have secret worlds inside our brains, don't we, diary?_

_I've been keeping the garden for as long as we've lived in this house. At first, I didn't think I could handle it, but Kuai wanted a garden, diary; he wanted roses. I told him I've never been good at keeping plants alive - I even managed to kill a cactus I brought back from a trip to Arizona! But he insisted, and when Kuai insists upon something, I comply. We started with a few bushes on the west side of the house, damask and cabbage roses, pink and fluttering and very intimidating. They were expensive, and I knew that Kuai would be angry if they died, so I obsessed over them._

_Over time, tending to the roses became less of a chore and more of a pleasure, so I added more bushes; yellow sun sprites, and Ingrid Bergman tea roses. Every morning I try to get up early and take care of them, weeding and pruning and watering. I like seeing the roses in the morning most of all when the dew is clinging to them and they're opening to take in their first drink of the sun, which glows on them and makes them shine._

_I sound horribly whimsical right now, don't I? That's what being in this house does to you, diary. This is what being with Kuai has done to me. He changed dramatically when he left Alaska for the east coast to go to medical school and finish his residency. It's like he had a brief taste of elegance, of the finer things, and he's been preoccupied with recreating it here in this small mountain town; and in me. I'm an ornament to him just like anything else, and I must be perfect._

_But I'm far from perfect, diary. You know that I know that. I'm sure Kuai knows it too, why else would he go to the trouble of creating the basement? It's almost like his own personal operating room. I'd describe it to you but I'm sure you'd only vomit if you had the faculties with which to do so._

_Anyway, the Kuai Liang I had come to know as a child all but disappeared when we became adults. He was sophisticated, refined, almost like he shed his childhood persona like a snake would shed its skin. Now he wants to listen to classical music and drink cognac instead of rocking out to the Raging Pussies and throwing back Bud Light. I guess being around other successful doctors and their wealthy families, seeing what they had and what he lacked, put a hunger in his blood. I was not aware of this when I sat down next to him at Lao's wedding reception, diary._

_It would seem that along with this drive for sophistication came a need to have things just so, too. Kuai was always kind of the controlling sort, but now his rules and dictations are the cornerstones of our lives. Let me explain, okay? I'll start with the single red rose I put in a specific crystal vase every morning._

_That started as soon as we were married, even before I had the garden. You see, Kuai proposed to me with roses which I found terribly sweet but also slightly odd._

_So, as I said, Kuai proposed to me during a summer night in Baltimore, right after he'd been offered a job in Fairbanks and we'd decided to move back to Alaska, to our roots. He took me out to a beautiful dinner at a place called the Rusty Scupper, which overlooks the Inner Harbor, a bustling place full of shops and a giant clipper ship resting in the green (horribly polluted, I'm sure) waters. Well, in the midst of golden candlelight and my eyes being full of stars (night had just fallen and the view was spectacular diary), Kuai gets down on one knee, and a server comes out with this huge bouquet of red roses and settles them in my arms, and then, then -_

_God, I want to cry every time I think about this story, diary. It was so sweet, it was so perfect...how often do you get to say that about a memory?_

_He pulled out this little black box and snapped it open, revealing this lovely, understated ring (I came to find out later it was platinum and of course, very expensive) and I can remember the candlelight being caught in his eyes, and for that moment they looked so open, so pure, so -_

_Alive. You know what I mean? I almost felt like I could see all the way into his heart, and then he asked me to marry him with very little fuss. He didn't make some grand speech or anything, but I was touched, you know?_

_When I finally stopped crying, I said yes, diary... He stood and kissed me as I held onto those red roses, and now he wants to see a red rose every morning. It's his small way of recreating that moment for himself, when I became his; when he -_

_No, I'm not going to ruin this story by being cynical. I actually think it's pretty sweet, don't you? See? Kuai can be nice when he wants to be. In fact, he's far nicer than I give him credit for, diary, but I have a habit of putting the bad times in you more than the good, but I suppose that's just human nature, isn't it?_

_Oh, god. Look at the time...it's nearly 7 and I still have to bathe and get breakfast prepared in time to wake up Kuai. And then he's driving me to work today, which I'm sure will be_ _hell on earth_ _just fine, so...best get moving._

_Always and forever,_

_Your Jade_

_PS: It's fitting that Kuai would love flowers that are studded with thorns, now that I think of it. I have a habit of catching my fingers on their spikes and he loves bandaging me up. Are you surprised? I'm not._

_PPS: There I go being negative again. Really, when will I learn?_

_PPPS: Should your name be Rose? I think that's rather sweet. Hmm..._

********

"It's unusual for you to take a bath in the morning," Kuai said, coming into the bathroom where Jade was in the process of rinsing out her hair. He sat on the edge of the tub and watched, eyes still heavy with sleep and his hair mussed. After a moment, he reached out and drifted a finger along Jade's exposed shoulder, dabbing at a bit of froth.

Jade's entire body tensed when her husband walked in, but when she saw how tender Kuai was being, she allowed herself to relax somewhat. Her reasoning for taking a bath was quite simple: it hurt to stand up for very long. Her knees were raw and puffy, and she hadn't wanted to deal with taking a shower. She of course didn't say this, or else Kuai would've had ample reason to forbid her from going to work.

"I'm sorry," she said, picking up a sponge and starting to wash her front. "Did the water running wake you up? I should've taken a bath in the guest room, -"

"Stop being silly," Kuai interrupted, taking the sponge from her and beginning to gently wash Jade's back. "Lean forward a little."

Obediently, Jade complied and almost sighed as the warm water cascaded over her neck and shoulders. The sweet smell of apples wafted around them, coupled with vague splashes of spice. Kuai preferred that she smell a certain way, so he always chose Jace's body washes and products for her. He didn't like anything floral, opting for fruitier scents, almost like he wanted to eat Jade alive.

"You're up early," Jade murmured, shivering a little when she felt Kuai's hand settling on her bareback; large and strong and full of so many capabilities, both good and bad. "I don't want you to be tired. You can go back to sleep for a bit while I make breakfast."

Kuai leaned over and brushed a kiss against Jade's temple, lingering for a moment and seeming to breathe in her freshly-cleaned scent.

"Let's spend the morning together," he replied, pulling away and wringing out the sponge. "Are you done in here?"

Jade nodded, beginning to rise, water sluicing over him. Kuai watched her with what Jade considered famished eyes, the morning sunlight pouring over them both from the skylight above. She wanted to cover herself at that moment but she didn't dare, knowing that her husband liked to see her, all of her; whenever he wanted. Jade's body was a book that was always meant to remain open, Kuai choosing to close it when and if he saw fit. He usually didn't.

"They're healing nicely," Kuai commented, passing a finger over ghostly bruises on Jade's abdomen and thighs, byproducts of punishments Jade couldn't even recall anymore. There were scars on her back but of course, she couldn't see what those looked like, and she wasn't about to try finding them in the mirror. Kuai ‘shand strayed to Jade's wrist and he lifted her arm, appraising it.

"You'll have to wear long sleeves today. And," he studied Jade's knees, the multitude of tiny cuts. "These don't look too bad, actually."

Jade nodded, watching as lifted a towel from the counter and began to dry her off, buffing her skin softly. Glancing down, she looked at her wrists as well and saw the raw marks from the handcuffs, red and pink and almost resembling burns.

"You'll wear your green shirt, I think," Kuai said, helping Jade step from the tub and leading her into the bedroom. "With your black pants. What do you think?"

Jade replied by wordlessly going to the closet and pulling out the articles of clothing Kuai described; holding them up for him to see.

"Yes, exactly. Put them on."

Jade complied, slipping on her underwear, pants, and shirt while Kuai watched her, almost like he was observing a play. Or an autopsy. Coming over, he adjusted Jade's collar and kissed her forehead.

"I love seeing you in green," he said, grinning. He twiddled Jade's moist hair. "It goes so well with your hair."

Jade looked down at the floor, Kuai's fingers still working their way through her hair. She knew that this was how Kuai showed his affection, by controlling every little aspect of his wife's life, but it became almost unbearable at times. Jade often associated her husband's attention with ongoing suffocation, every day her air was cut off a little more.

"Aren't you going to dress me?" Kuai teased, though Jade knew he meant it. Immediately, she went to the closet but stopped, peering back at Kuai who was watching her.

"Are you seeing patients today at your office, or are you -"

"You should know my schedule by now, Jade."

Jade winced. She thought she knew Kuai's schedule, but it had been a little erratic lately; she just didn't want to make a mistake.

"You have a case this morning, don't you?" She asked, tensing and waiting for the other shoe to drop.

"A bypass," Kuai replied, dryly. "Triple."

"Right, a bypass," Jade muttered, turning to the closet and grabbing her husband's scrubs from the shelf. Turning, she brought them over to Kuai and held them out, beginning to tremble slightly.

Kuai was silent for a moment, just looking at Jade in that clinical way he had. Then, abruptly, he smiled.

"Perfect, thank you," he said, reaching out and taking the scrubs. He cocked a brow. "What about my coat?"

Jade flinched a little and ran back to the closet, lifting Kuai's white lab coat from a hanger and bringing it back; "Kuai Liang, MD" prominent on the fabric, with "Cardiology" underneath, all in blue stitching.

"All pressed and ready to go, wonderful," Kuai praised her, making Jade flush slightly. She couldn't help it when her husband complimented her, it was almost like a sedative seeping into her blood, calming her.

Jade sat on the edge of the bed and watched her husband dress, marveling once again at how well Kuai Liang had turned out. He'd shot up during high school, having reached his final height of 6'2, and while he was gangling and somewhat awkward back then, he'd grown into himself in the ensuing years. Now he possessed a lean strength that Jade had to admit she found appealing, hardened, and shaped by running and weightlifting. Kuai would never admit it, but he was rather vain about his appearance, meticulous about getting a haircut every six weeks, his sleek, black hair cut short on the sides but longer on top, swept off of his forehead. He also had a habit of letting some stubble grow in between shaving, but Jade liked it; it made him look like a panther, almost; rugged but refined.

Her eyes lingered on her husband's bicep as he pulled his scrub pants on, on the 'J' etched there, tattooed very shortly after they'd gotten married. Jade peered down at the 'K' she had tattooed on her ankle, the place that her husband had chosen because he thought it would be cute. 

"How do I look?" Kuai asked, shrugging on his lab coat and looking to Jade for her approval. Jade smiled softly, feeling affection for Kuai in his doctor's garb, adoring the success he'd made of himself even if she couldn't understand all of the pieces that made up his personality.

"Wonderful," Jade said, honestly. She'd always found Kuai attractive, there was no denying that. It was his actions that made her take pause. Sometimes it was hard to separate one from the other, especially when her husband was looking at her so openly and bathed in the light of a new morning. At times like this, it was almost like the basement had never existed, could never possibly exist.

"You haven't told me you love me yet today," Kuai chastised, playfully; a wry smile quirking his lips. "You know that isn't very nice."

"My apologies," Jade laughed, coming over and wrapping her arms around Kuai's waist.

"I love you, Kuai."

******

"Is this one of your Ingrid Bergman's?" Kuai asked, fingering the lovely red rose in the cut-glass crystal vase. He had just finished up his plate of eggs and turkey bacon, staying to linger over his perfectly made cup of coffee. He glanced at Jade, who was hurriedly washing up the breakfast dishes, catching his eye.

"Yes, it is," Jade replied, lifting the coffee pot and going over to the table. Without being asked, she poured some more into Kuai's cup. "Hold on, I'll get the cream and sugar for you."

"Thanks, love," Kuai said, crossing his legs and smiling as he watched Jade mill about the kitchen, the diligent little hausfrau. He was quiet for a moment as Jade came back with the cream and sugar, doctoring Kuai's coffee and stirring it a little for him. Kuai lifted the mug to his mouth and drank deeply, smacking his lips a little when he drew the cup away.

"Perfect," he grinned before pausing for a moment. He picked up his paper and glanced at it before setting it back down, his eyes sliding to Jade though he didn't turn his head; tone conversational when he spoke next. "I just don't understand why you insist on going to work every day when you don't have to. That's always bothered me, you know?"

Jade groaned inwardly, having not expected this line of discussion so suddenly. She kept her face passive though.

"I like having something to do," she said, carefully. She began loading the dishwasher.

"You have plenty to do," Kuai said, taking another sip of coffee. "Taking care of the house, tending to the roses." He brushed a finger over the red rose again then glanced back at Kyle.

"That should be enough for you."

Now they were treading into dangerous territory. Jade made a mental note to watch every word that passed her lips as her life depended on it; oftentimes, it did.

_Why must our discussions always turn into minefields?_

"The thing is, I don't work that many hours, Kuai, so..." she trailed off, groping for something to say, something that wouldn't lead to the basement. Jade took a deep breath, mustering up a little gumption.

"I feel like I can handle having a part-time job and taking care of us."

_Taking care of you._

Kuai's eyes narrowed slightly, which immediately put Jade on edge, but he didn't look especially angry yet. Clearing her throat, Jade tried to appeal to her husband's better nature.

"Besides," she continued, closing up the dishwasher and starting it. "I get lonely being by myself, you know? This place is so big and sometimes it just feels so..."

_Suffocating. Stifling. Terrifying. Like it's eating me alive._

"....quiet."

"Quiet," Kuai said, running his finger along the rim of his mug, eyes drifting away. "Lonely." He cut his eyes back to Jade, and he was taken aback at the remoteness, the sterile quality of them; it was like viewing a planet turning in empty, dark space. He stood from his place, slowly. Coming over to Jade, Kuai backed her up against the counter.

"What are you lonely for, Jade?" Kuai asked, looking down at her with his dead eyes, leaning forward and placing his hands on either side of Jade, locking her in so she couldn't move away. "Another guy? Is that it?"

"N-no, of course not," Jade stammered, gazing up at him with a small animal fear, body already beginning to tremble. Clearly, she'd said the wrong thing. "I just meant -"

"I give you so much," Kuai said, almost like Jade hadn't been speaking in the first place. "So much." He looked around, taking in the grandeur, the opulence of their surroundings, then glanced back at Jade. "Why isn't this enough for you, Jade? Huh?"

"Kuai, you know -"

"Quiet," Kuai said, and it was almost like he'd placed a finger against Jade's lips. "Now, I want to know something, and I want you to tell me the truth. The complete truth, not just parts of it. Do you understand?"

Jade nodded, eyes wide with growing fear; heart pounding and palms sweating. Kuai was getting into his murderous element, the quiet anger filling him up like a poisoned reservoir; altering him.

"Have you been unfaithful to me?"

Jade opened her mouth but Kuai gave her a look, a look that plainly said to keep quiet.

Kuai continued, calmly. "I mean have you thought about stepping out, have you talked to someone...have you even fucking considered it. That's what I'm talking about. Tell me."

Jade stared up at him, not knowing where this was coming from but also knowing at the same time. For all of Kuai's confidence and strength, he was also vastly insecure when it came to anything related to Jade, and she'd never been able to figure out why. She could only figure that it had to do with Skarlet, who'd done something years ago that put some of the poison in Kuai's blood, though they'd never gone into the details. All at once, Jade could only think of the laugh lines around Liu's brown eyes and the tattoos winding around his arms, and then her mind felt like a jumbled mess, utter chaos gripping her in its bloody fist.

 _Does he know?_ Jade thought frantically, reaching back and gripping at the counter to keep herself from falling. _He has to know I got a ride from Liu Kang, right? Why else would he be questioning me like this? But if he knew he would've taken me into the basement already. I wouldn't even be able to stand up today._

"Silence speaks volumes, doesn't it?" Kuai mused, still staring at Jade with his surgeon's eyes, methodical and cold.

"I-I'm just not sure how to answer because I haven't done anything, so I'm..." Jade stammered, looking down and feeling the tears start to collect, hot as they burned her eyes. She looked up, silently pleading for her husband's understanding.

"I've never even considered being unfaithful to you, Kuai. Never. I've always tried to show you how much I love you." Jade could feel himself breaking now, the stress and the tension building until she thought she would shatter. "I don't know how to make you believe me. I don't even know if I can."

Jade stared at Kuai, not caring that she was begging with her eyes, with her whole being, for him to be kind; to believe her. It was the truth, after all. She'd only accepted the ride from Liu because she'd been pushed to the wall, it wasn't as if she harbored any ideas of escape or falling into someone else's arms. At least, she didn't think she did, but the heart and mind were a vast forested tangle; who knew what secrets existed she couldn't even conceive of?

Thankfully, Kuai softened at these words, and the relief Jade felt bordered on being overwhelming, causing her to sag against the counter; nearly feeling boneless. Her husband must have noticed and she smirked, wrapping his arms around Jade and pulling her close.

"You seem tense," he commented, nuzzling against Jade's hair. "I don't know why you're always so on edge, love, but you do have medication for that. Why don't you take something before we leave?"

Relief made Jade foolish and she didn't automatically go to retrieve her bottle of Klonopin from her bag. She laughed instead.

"Right, so I can fall asleep as soon as I get there? I'm sure Kitana would love that."

Kuai's arms tightened, making Jade squeak softly, heartbeat rising steadily. What she'd said could certainly be misconstrued as mouthing off, but that hadn't been her intention.

"I don't give a fuck what Kitana would like," Kuai said, holding Jade tightly. It made her think of when they were in bed at night, the way Kuai would wind his arms around her until it felt like chains holding her down. "I care about you, Jade. You're my focus, not her, and I think it would behoove you to take your medication."

"You're right, Kuai. I'm sorry," Jade said, softly. She hated the dead quality that stole into her voice when he surrendered but it couldn't be helped.

"Unless you want to stay home," Kuai continued, letting her go and staring down into Jade's face. His eyes were coming back to themselves, no longer cold objects orbiting far beyond the earth. "I can go either way but I think you know what my preference is."

"I-I'll take the medication," Jade replied, slowly going to retrieve her bag, feeling for her diary tucked safely away in its secret pocket on the side. Pulling the Klonopin bottle out, she opened it and pulled one tiny blue pill out. She slipped it into her mouth and swallowed it dry; she'd become an expert over the years. Who even needed water anymore?

Kuai nodded, smiling, then checked his phone.

"Time to skedaddle," he said, warming up almost immediately. Rapid mood shifts were a hallmark of his personality. "Are you ready, babe?"

"Ready as I'll ever be," Jade sighed, pulling her messenger bag onto her shoulder.

*******

A Schubert serenade was still wafting through Jade's brain when she and Kuai Liang walked into the gallery shortly thereafter. She'd been surprised when her husband opted for something other than Chopin while they rode in the car, but she wasn't complaining. Trips to the basement very rarely involved Schubert.

"Well, at least there wasn't anything wrong with your car that a little jump wouldn't fix," Kuai said, his tone light and playful. He was close on Jade's heels, looking around at the hushed gallery still in the process of coming to life.

"Jade, good morning!" Kitana said, coming out of the back and smiling warmly, a smile that faltered slightly when she saw Kuai. "Oh, Kuai. Hello..."

"Morning," Kuai replied curtly. Jade could practically feel the ice coating her husband's voice. There was that changing on a dime quality again she loved to adopt at a whim.

Kitana glanced at Jade, violet eyes watchful.

"I was worried about you," she said, coming closer, her boots striking the floor with little clacks. "I noticed your car was still here when I left. Is everything okay? I would've called, but -"

She looked at Kuai for a moment, a tiny muscle in her jaw jumping slightly.

"I didn't want to bother you," she finished.

Jade didn't reply, waiting for her husband's inevitable handling of the inquiry.

"Everything's fine, Kitana. The battery died but it's been handled." His tone still had the ice in it which didn't surprise Jade. Kuai had never been overly fond of Kitana.

"How did you get home, though?" Kitana continued, flying in the face of decorum and openly choosing to ignore Kuai's abruptness. She had nothing to fear, after all; the basement wasn't a part of her life. "Did you call a cab? I would have driven you, Jade."

"She tried to walk," Kuai said, simply. "But she managed to get a ride with someone who wasn't a serial killer, so." He placed a hand on Jade's shoulder, almost making her wince but she caught herself just in time.

"All's well that ends well, right?" Kuai said, but now the ice was disappearing. Even he could play nice on occasion, especially if it would shut someone up; especially a nosy busybody like Kitana. Jade knew he couldn't stand her prying.

"I suppose," Kitana replied, slowly; carefully. "You're okay, right, Jade?"

Jade nodded, Kuai's fingers tightening on her shoulder. It was in that moment that her knees openly throbbed, and she grimaced slightly; the Klonopin winding through her blood like a hazy ribbon. She just wanted to sit down and be alone for a while.

"Wow, did you get some new stuff?" Kuai suddenly asked, taking his hand away from Jade's shoulder and walking across the room to the photographs adorning the far wall. Jade and Jade exchanged a look as Craig appraised the pictures, hands jammed into the pockets of his lab coat.

"These are actually pretty good," he said, leaning forward to peer at a cityscape flush with the newly rising sun. "Nice balance, very clear."

Kitana sighed softly, so softly that only Jade could hear. He knew that Kitana found Kuai very trying, and it also annoyed her that Kuai didn't really have a lot of respect for the arts unless he could dissect what he was appraising. She walked over and studied the photographs as well, the sun falling through the windows and highlighting her rich, dark hair, her tailored white blouse, and black pencil skirt.

"I'm very fond of this collection," she said, a finger drifting over a picture of mesas silhouetted against a dramatic starscape. "They make me want to travel."

"Yeah, like that's ever going to happen," Kuai replied, straightening up and glancing at her in his impassive way. "Good luck traveling with a kid."

Kitana bristled openly at this comment, but she remained composed.

"Children grow up, Kuai."

"Is that so? Will wonders never cease," he said, glancing back at Jade and rolling his eyes. He was clearly done conversing with Kitana and wanted his wife to intervene. Jade came over after setting her bag on the counter, trying to hide the way she was limping.

"Which one is your favorite?" Kuai asked, wrapping his arm around Jade's shoulders and pulling her close.

Jade flushed, once again hating how her husband enjoyed putting her on the spot, even when it came to simple things. She was silent, trying to decide whether or not she should tell the truth about the lighthouse. It just seemed too personal, something she wanted to keep to herself, much like her diary.

"Maybe I can guess," Kuai mused, kissing Jade's temple. "Would you like that?"

Jade glanced at Kitana, who was watching this exchange with raised eyebrows, a mixture of interest and confusion clouding her features. Finally, she nodded her head slowly.

"Yes, please," she murmured. "Try to guess."

"Well, I'd like to think I know you pretty well, Jade, so," Kuai said, looking around at the array of photos. "Let me see." He tapped his chin with his finger, ruminating. Finally, he snapped his fingers. "That one."

Jade almost shivered when Kuai zeroed in on the lighthouse, despising the way her husband could crawl inside of her brain and see everything, but also admiring him for his uncanny ability to sniff out the truth. Still, she didn't want Kuai to know how much she admired the lighthouse. She couldn't say why but it was just how she felt. She dared to contradict her husband.

"Nope," she said, laughing lightly. "Try again."

Kuai was silent for a time, the atmosphere shifting enough that Jade just wanted to fade away, almost wishing she'd just told the truth. All at once, the little bell over the door chimed to indicate that someone was entering the gallery. They all turned to see an older woman standing there, her blue-rinsed curls stark in the morning sunlight. Jade could hear Kuai groan slightly, could feel him stiffen up beside her.

"Mrs. Goldfein," he said, his voice smacking of false enthusiasm; obvious to Jade but not to anyone else. Kuai finally relinquished his hold on Jade's shoulders and went to the woman, offering his hand; the older woman shook it gratefully. "How's Harry doing?" he asked, smiling widely. Jade almost shuddered to see it, that masquerade of a grin.

"Oh, Dr. Liang, you're just the person I wanted to see," Mrs. Goldfein said, holding onto Kuai's hand. "It's so funny I should run into you here, isn't it? I was just stopping in to check on the painting I was having framed and here you are! It's a small world, isn't it?"

"It certainly is," Kuai smiled, his eyes crinkling up warmly. He almost looked like a completely different person. "And you know, I was just thinking about you and Mr. Goldfein just the other day. You must bring me more of that peanut brittle you make. Only eating it once a year is killing me."

"Oh, you're so naughty, Dr. Liang," the older woman laughed, blushing slightly. "But you know I can't refuse you. I'll bring some by the next time Harry's in the office. But I still needed to speak with you about his Plavix. I have some concerns."

"Well, by all means, I'm all ears, Mrs. Goldfein," Kuai replied, taking her arm. "Accompany me to my car and I'll answer any questions you have." He turned back to Jade, and while he was smiling it didn't reach his eyes.

"I'll be home a little later than usual tonight, love," he said, brown eyes delving into Jade's; a tundra of secrets and concealed rage. "I'll bring sushi. How does that sound?"

"Perfect," Jade said, almost reaching the end of her endurance, what with her knees screaming at her and the Klonopin throwing her off-balance. "That'd be great."

"Wonderful," Kuai smirked, still holding Mrs. Goldfein's arm. "Be good."

Jade could feel herself blanching, but he held onto his smile and waved, feeling Kitana's eyes boring into the side of her skull.

"Oh, you two are just adorable," Mrs. Goldfein gushed as Kuai opened the door for her. "I was just telling Harry the other day that...."

Her voice faded away as the door shut behind them, and for a moment Jade watched the pair head across the parking lot toward Kuai's black Audi. She glanced at Kitana and saw that she was watching as well, arms crossed and a tiny frown on her face.

"You know, he reminds me of those dolls," she said, almost like she was talking to herself.

"Dolls?" Jade asked, turning away and trying to walk as normally as possible to her corner; Kitana in tow.

"Yeah, you know, those Russian nesting dolls?" She leaned on the counter as Jade settled herself on his stool, taking a deep breath. "The ones you pop open and a smaller one appears and so on and so forth?"

"Matryoshka," Jade said, idly. She'd often had the same thought, so she knew exactly what she meant.

"Why do you even know that?" Kitana laughed, resting her face in her hand.

Kyle shrugged, pulling out Mrs. Goldfein's painting so he could show it to her when she wandered back into the gallery.

"Why wouldn't I?" She asked.

"That's fair, but still, you know what I mean, right? It's like he has a face for every occasion," Kitana said, tapping her finger on the counter.

"Don't we all?" Jade replied, not really wanting to broach this subject, not with the Klonopin settling into her blood and making her drowsy.

Kitana was silent for a while, watching Jade as she worked, her finger continuously tapping on the counter and putting her on edge.

"Was he right?" She finally asked.

"Hmm?"

"About the picture," she said, her finger finally stopping its incessant tapping. "Was he right?"

"Kitana, I have a lot of work to do and you know how picky Mrs. Goldfein is, so..." Jade trailed off, just wanting some quiet, some respite. She had to deal with Kuai living inside of her head, she would appreciate just a little distance at that moment, if only for a little while.

"Right, yeah. Sorry, I was being nosy again, wasn't I?" Kitana straightened up and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, smiling softly.

Jade didn't say anything, only gave her a tiny quirk of an eyebrow; that seemed to say enough. She laughed.

"Alright, well, I'll leave you to it, huh? I'll be in my office making a few calls. Tell Erron to come see me when he gets in, okay?"

"Sure," Jade said, listening to the clacking of her heels as she retreated into her inner sanctum. Finally, there was silence and she could relax a little. Not completely, of course, but enough. Idly, she reached over and flicked on the radio, classic rock oozing out of the speakers and filling up the morning. Jade smiled.

"Fuck Schubert and Chopin," she murmured, settling down to work. "Give me Heart any day."

*******

"Nice day, huh?"

Jade glanced up from the sandwich she'd been eating, pulling one of her earbuds out while her eyes adjusted to the sunshine making it so the person speaking to her was in silhouette. She was disoriented for a moment, pulled from her thoughts. She'd been readying herself to write, her diary sitting on her knee and waiting.

"What?" She asked, eyes finally cooperating and bringing the owner of the voice into focus. "Liu?" Hurriedly, she pulled out her other earbud and set her phone aside, brushing some crumbs from her lap. "What are you doing here?"

Liu Kang laughed and tucked his hands into the pockets of his jeans, looking very much the same as he did the day before: flannel and a t-shirt hugging his torso, dark jeans, and dress shoes on his feet. Jade's eyes lingered on his strong arms for a moment, cataloging the tattoos etched into Liu's tanned skin. For some reason, she wanted to be able to remember them.

"You told me I could drop by, remember?" He glanced at Jade's sandwich. "Whatcha eating? Can I have some?"

Jade scrambled to remember what she was eating, the food tasting like sawdust in her mouth. Food had kind of lost its flavor over the years, as far as she was concerned. At this point, she was just eating to survive.

"Black forest ham and Gouda on artisan something or other," she said, holding it up. "I'm not really hungry, anyway. Go ahead."

Liu just stared at her, the wind ruffling his hair as it passed through, summer sunshine pressing down and shadowing his eyes slightly. Jade had opted to sit outside of the gallery to eat her lunch that day, enjoying the sun and the quiet as Kitana entertained some clients and Erron playing gopher for her.

"Since when do you eat froufrou bullshit like that, Jade?" Liu Kang finally asked, reaching down and taking the sandwich anyway. He took a quick bite, not even bothering to avoid Jade's bite marks. He chewed for a moment then made a face.

"You need some actual fucking food." He handed the sandwich back and rubbed his hands together. "No wonder you're so damn skinny."

Jade looked down at herself, surprised. She'd always been on the slight side but she didn't think she looked any skinnier than usual. Although, how would she know? She usually avoided her full reflection, choosing instead to keep tabs on her weight based on how her clothes felt. Kuai preferred her thin, so she was ever vigilant. Did it look bad, though?

"I can already tell you're overthinking things," Liu said, shaking his head a little. "Did you want to head up the street a ways, maybe get a hot dog or something? You know, real food?"

Jade had to laugh now.

"Hot dogs aren't food in any sense of the word, Liu, but sure." She stood, straightening her clothes and jamming her uneaten lunch and diary into her bag; slipping her phone and earbuds inside as well. She stopped for a moment, though, looking around the street warily. What if someone saw? What if Kuai found out she'd eaten lunch with Liu Kang?

"You okay?" Liu asked, eyeing her closely.

"Of course, I was just getting my bearings," Jade replied, ignoring the stutter in her voice. She fell into step beside Liu as they walked up the street, passing little shops as they went. "Sorry, I guess I'm kind of in my head today."

"You've been in your head for the last twenty-plus years," Liu Kang said, brushing the hair out of his eyes. "I didn't expect that to change so don't apologize."

Jade frowned, hardly able to make heads or tails of Liu's words. Since when was he so observant?

"What'd you want?" Liu Kang asked, stopping in front of a little dive on the corner. "I'm buying."

"You don't need to do that," Jade sighed, pulling out her wallet.

"Put that shit away, please," Liu said, pulling a toothpick out of his pocket and placing it between his teeth. "I invited you so I'm buying, end of story. This place," he continued, pointing to the little restaurant, "has fucking amazing hot dogs. Best kielbasa I've ever had, even better than the ones you get from those little carts in New York City. What do you think?"

Jade put her wallet away slowly, watching the way Liu worked the toothpick between his teeth, almost feeling hypnotized.

"You've been to New York City?"

"I've been to a lot of places, Jade, but that isn't the point right now," Liu Kang said, reaching up and twisting the toothpick. "The point is food. Man food. Food that'll put some meat on your scrawny ass."

"K-kielbasa sounds fine, sure," Jade stammered, suddenly blushing though she couldn't have said why. She tucked errant hair behind her ear and looked at the pavement; tiny specks of shiny rock glimmering in the sun. "Whatever you think is best, that's what I'll have."

"How very demure of you," Liu said, dryly. "You wait here, okay? I'll be right back."

It wasn't too long before Liu Kang returned with the food and two cups as well, filled to the brim with sweet, tangy lemonade. They sat in the sunshine at a little picnic table and Jade couldn't believe how wonderful the kielbasa tasted, almost groaning when the delicious lemonade poured over her tongue, practically tasting of summertime.

"This is amazing," she breathed, taking another big bite, peppers, and spice mixture together in her mouth along with the smoky meat. "And this place is right down the street? Why haven't I eaten here before?"

"You're too busy eating artisan bullshit," Liu snickered, taking a long sip of lemonade and sighing a little. "Food doesn't have to be expensive to taste good, Jade. You should know that."

Jade shrugged, toying with her straw for a moment before taking another drink; the liquid resting on her tongue and becoming so vivid she couldn't believe it. It was almost like her taste buds were waking up after being put under a spell.

"Try telling Kuai that, won't you?" She said before she really thought about it, regretting her words immediately.

"I had a feeling Liang was the driving force behind the pretension," Liu commented, popping the last bit of his kielbasa into his mouth; eyes squinting against the sunshine. "He was always a small-town boy with big-city aspirations, huh?"

Jade chose to ignore that question, noting again the seeming dislike that registered in Liu Kang's tone when it came to Kuai.

"When were you in New York?" She asked, finishing off her lemonade and immediately wanting more.

"Here, have some of mine," Liu said, passing the cup over; almost like he could read Jade's mind. He watched closely as Jade took a long sip, brown eyes still squinted but otherwise amused, almost appearing fond. 

"To answer your question, I've been to New York tons of times, Jade," he continued, resting his arms on the table, muscles bunching up under his skin. Jade watched them but her eyes flitted away quickly.

"Did you like it?" Jade asked, trying to make conversation but feeling like she was failing abysmally. She hadn't had to make this sort of small talk in so long. "I didn't really care for it beyond the Broadway District, but I'm just a tourist. What do I know?"

"Welcome to my life, sunshine," Liu laughed, muscles flexing slightly; making his tattoos jump. "I'm a tourist everywhere I go. I don't have any roots, except for here, of course."

"Why did you come back?" Jade asked, taking another small sip of Liu's lemonade. Vaguely, she was aware that her lips were resting in the same place Liu Kang's had, and this knowledge kind of thrilled her.

"You're just full of questions, aren't you?" Liu asked, waving the cup away when Jade tried to pass it back. "By the way, I hated New York. Too loud. Too big."

"Sorry, I'm just -" Jade broke off, not sure what to say. There she went, overstepping her boundaries and becoming as nosy as Kitana.

"I'm not used to you apologizing this much, Jade," Liu Kang mused. "It's kind of weird. When did you start being so," he thought a moment, arms continuing to flex and distracting Jade terribly, "careful? You're so careful. Did you notice that?"

"I think most people would call it polite," Jade replied, arching a brow. "And since when is that a crime?"

"See, there's the Jade I remember," Liu Kang said, nodding his head. "I knew she was in there somewhere, behind the Ralph Lauren and Gouda cheese."

Jade couldn't help but laugh, gazing at Liu with irritation mixed with affection.

"Were you always this much of a smart ass?" She asked, playing with the empty lemonade cup and feeling weirdly shy. "Or am I just lucky?"

"I have a feeling you could use some luck," Liu countered, becoming slightly serious but it cleared quickly; almost like the sun had been covered by clouds that were swiftly burned away. "I'm back in town to look after my mom," he added, suddenly. "She's on dialysis these days and she doesn't get around too great, so I'm stepping in to help. Chan can't do it all by himself, not with all the kids he up and had."

"God, I haven't spoken to Chan in ages," Jade said, getting lost in her thoughts for a moment. She was also slightly disturbed by Liu Kang's comment about her using some luck. What the fuck did that even mean?

"You haven't really spoken to anyone in ages," Liu said.

Jade glanced at him, eyes sharpening.

"What does that mean?"

Liu Kang shrugged a little, and now Jade was becoming exceedingly annoyed with how preoccupied she was with his biceps. Kuai lifted but his arms didn't look nearly as big, as refined. He was still strong, though; too strong.

"I was talking to Kitana and she said you've really kept to yourself in the last couple of years," he replied. "Ever since you married Liang."

"Kitana likes to talk, doesn't she?" Jade muttered, looking down at her hands. They'd begun to tremble.

"Lao said the same thing," Liu said in an offhand manner. "I got to see Ollie, by the way. He's just the cutest little thing, isn't he? He and Kitana sure make cute babies."

"I have to go," Jade said, standing suddenly and wincing before she could hide it, her knees throbbing from the sudden movement. She sat quickly, rubbing at the aching flesh.

"Hey, are you okay?" Liu Kang asked, concern threading through his voice as he stood and came around the table. He reached out a hand but Jade flinched away, warding him off.

"I'm fine," she explained, voice faltering slightly. "I was working out and I pulled a muscle in my leg. No big deal."

"Are you sure? I mean, I could -"

"No," Jade cut him off, standing again and gritting her teeth through the pain. "I'm fine, okay? Besides, I need to get back to work. I've been gone too long."

Liu Kang watched her for a moment, summer sunlight making him glow but also washing away the years until he looked like a boy of 17 again.

"Is it okay if I stop by again sometime? You seem kind of pissed off."

"Do what you want," Jade replied, beginning to walk back toward the gallery. "You know where to find me."

"I'll take that as an emphatic yes," Liu called behind her, some of his old bravado leaking into his voice and making Jade smile against her will.

Reaching up, she flipped Liu off as she continued to walk away, the sunshine dazzling her eyes as the flavors of lemonade rested on her tongue, sweet and tart all at the same time.

*****

"Aren't you hungry?"

Jade glanced up from her plate of sushi, a glass of chardonnay languishing in her hand; forgotten.

"Huh?" She asked, pushing away thoughts of summer sunlight and brown eyes, tattoos settled into tan, almost golden, skin.

Through the candlelight, Kuai was watching her, hair still damp from the shower he'd taken after coming home. He'd handed the bags of sushi to Jade before kissing her softly on the mouth, whispering that he'd missed her. Jade had smiled and leaned into the kiss, her mind a quagmire she couldn't even hope to understand.

"You've barely touched your food," Kuai said, studying Jade's plate; shiitake mushroom rolls still laying in neat lines, salmon avocado untouched as well. "Don't you like it?"

Jade took a slow sip of the wine and grimaced at its bitterness, suddenly wanting lemonade more than anything in the world. Who cared if this stuff was fifty bucks a bottle? It didn't taste good in the slightest. She didn't say that of course. She arranged her features into a mask of extreme docility, just wanting to go along to get along.

"I'm a little tired, I guess," she offered by way of explanation, setting down her glass of wine and picking up a roll. She carefully dipped it in some soy sauce then brought it to her lips. Jade popped it in her mouth and chewed slowly, smiling brightly at her husband. She swallowed, suddenly recalling the flavors of spicy sausage and peppers vividly. _Peasant food,_ Kuai would call it.

"It's delicious, though," she added quickly, reaching out and taking a hold of Kuai's hand; squeezing it lightly. "Thank you for picking it up. I know you're tired after being with patients all day."

"Tell me about it," Kuai replied, taking a long sip of his own wine, setting the glass down with a clunk. "Fucking Gladys Goldfein, she never shuts up. Wanting to fucking talk about her husband's medication before I've even had a chance to wake up, and then a goddamn bypass with incompetent -"

He stopped, picking up a roasted eel roll, a quail egg balanced precariously on the top. He slid it into his mouth and chewed, eyes closing with pleasure. They popped open a moment later, registering faint anger and something else, an emotion Jade couldn't pinpoint but it made her nervous anyway.

"Is there anything I can do to help?" Jade asked, obediently picking up another shiitake mushroom roll and dunking it in soy sauce. It wouldn't do to not clear her plate, not after Kuai had gone to so much trouble.

"Yeah, you can get Kitana to back the fuck off and mind her own business," Kuai snapped, pouring more wine in his glass. "She's always fucking sticking her nose into stuff that doesn't concern her, mainly anything having to do with you. I'm sick of it."

Jade sighed inwardly. So, this was how their evening was going to go. Unbidden, thoughts of Liu's casual banter and lazy drawl filled her mind, and it was almost like she was back at that rickety picnic table, the summer wind flush against her back.

"I'm sorry," she murmured, eyes cast downward. This was not the first time they'd had this conversation. "I'll talk to her, Kuai. She means well, you know."

"You always say that," Kuai replied, voice becoming dangerous. "You're always defending her, Jade, when really you should be defending me; your husband. Unless you forgot."

Jade looked up at him, heart thumping in her chest as sweat collected on her brow. They were quickly straying into basement territory.

"Of course I didn't forget," she stammered. "I defend you all the time, I -"

"So, you need to defend me, huh?" Kuai cut her off, voice softening but still dangerous. "What are you telling these people, huh?"

"N-nothing, Kuai, I just meant," Jade broke off, groping for words; desperately backpedaling. "What do you want me to say here? I never tell them anything bad about you. You know that."

"I don't know anything that goes on in that place," Kuai sneered, sitting back and swirling the wine in his glass. "That's part of the problem, isn't it? Anything could be going on over there and I'd never fucking know. Do you think that sits well with me?"

"Please, honey," Jade pleaded, standing and coming around the table slowly. Suddenly, she didn't want to be still. She could never stay in one place when her anxiety spiked. "I don't want to fight with you, okay? We're having a nice dinner...we're having a nice evening...let's just keep it this way."

"Nice," Kuai repeated, gazing up at Jade for a moment. Slowly, he set his wine glass down again and reached up to take a hold of Jade's arm, yanking her onto his lap; eliciting a small yelp from the other. 

"You think this is nice, being here with me?" He asked, bringing his hand up to settle on the back of Jade's head.

"Of course I do," Jade said, not resisting when Kuai pulled her forward, kissing her mouth roughly.

"Know what else would be nice?" Kuai breathed, breaking away and gazing at Jade with predator's eyes, almost resembling a wolf feasting on a lamb. "Fucking you over this table. That would be perfect, actually. Don't you think?"

Jade couldn't help but whimper, still feeling sore from the rough treatment she'd suffered the night before at the hands of her husband. Kuai didn't seem to notice her hesitation, though. Rather, he stood, dragging Jade with him.

"It'll be okay, baby," he said, pulling down Jade's pants and instructing her to bend over the cherry wood table, pushing some of their plates out of the way. "This is exactly what we need, don't you think? It'll be _nice_."

"Kuai, please, I can't -"

Jade stopped when she felt him violently thrust into her, pushing her up against the table and making the glassware shiver, the candlelight wavering with every movement. She clenched her hands into trembling fists as her husband brutally fucked her, the sushi forgotten in the onslaught of Kuai's relentless ferocity.

"How do you manage to feel better every single time?" Kuai gasped out, voice ragged as he slammed into Jade's aching form. Suddenly, he brought down a hand and slapped Jade's ass, making her shriek. He laughed, leaning down and kissing Jade's lower back, making her shiver like she was drenched in cold rainfall.

Jade didn't answer, face becoming slack as Kuai continued to consume her, eyes nearly fading out as she watched the trembling candlelight. All at once, all she could see in her mind's eye were Liu Kang's tattoos, and as she shut her eyes she tried to remember each of them in turn, black ink leaking across sun-dappled, golden skin; becoming lost in an endless summer day tasting of lemonade.

******

It was after 3 am when Jade was finally able to break away from Kuai, his soft breaths wafting into the quiet bedroom and fading away. He hadn't taken her into the basement but the handcuffs had come out again, as did the belt, among other articles Kuai used when he was in a mood. Jade had endured it all, only crying once when the buckle caught her skin, red oozing up through the bruised whiteness.

She didn't know why Kuai was in a savage place, but Jade hadn't fought. She'd suffered through the brutalization and the aftermath, Kuai holding her closely and bathing her in the large master bathroom, the skylight resplendent with stars as warm water washed over aching flesh. He hadn't apologized, of course, because in his mind he hadn't done anything wrong, but Jade didn't mind; Kuai's careful, healing fingers represented an apology that was never going to come, and she could live with that.

"I love you so much," he'd said as he tucked Jade into bed, having administered Ibuprofen and peroxide swabs, patching Jade up and kissing her on the forehead. Kuai had laid beside Jade and held her close, running his fingers through moist, black hair until Jade had finally fallen asleep, fitful dreams seeping into her brain like subtle, gentle poison.

Jade decided she didn't want to write in her diary that night, opting instead to steal through the dark corridors of the massive house until she found herself in her studio, the large painting she'd been working on waiting for her in silent repose. She stood before it for a moment, just studying the canvas as the night wheeled around her, caustic stars shining against the panes of glass; the moon a coin tossed into the endless fountain of the sky.

She was dressed just in her pajamas and nothing else, white bandages adorning her knees and antibiotic cream smeared across the wounds screaming through her back. Jade could feel the waiting bruises pulsing on her hips from where Kuai had gripped her, winced at the throbbing in her backside and all through her bones. Her body was a war zone as she regarded the painting with shaded, weary eyes. At first, she didn't think she'd continue with the canvas she covered in red paint, but now she realized that she identified with it. Weren't they almost one and the same?

"I know exactly what I'm going to call you," she murmured as she picked up another can of paint, a bright crimson that would contrast nicely with the dark red already splashed over the white. Drenching a large paintbrush with it, she began to slash at the canvas like the brush was a knife and he was stabbing someone incessantly; ceaselessly.

 _Rage,_ she thought, savagely; the anger building in her until she thought it was consuming her like a fire.

I'm going to call you 'Rage.'


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Trigger warning- violence

_ Dear Rose, _

_ Okay, I'm already rethinking the name, how about you? It just doesn't look right. Then again, I'm probably overthinking things, which I have a habit of doing, but you knew that already, didn't you? This entire diary is the end result of my overthinking, isn't it? _

_ Things became ugly tonight, Rose. Not as ugly as they could've been, but ugly nonetheless. I don't know what happened, honestly. We were sitting there, eating the lovely dinner that Kuai brought home, and then he...he... _

_ Can you tell me something, Rose? How do you know when you're having a breakdown? Are you actually cognizant of it while it's happening, or does it happen while you aren't paying attention? If you have the presence of mind to notice it, does that mean you aren't having a breakdown at all? Do you have to become completely insane for it to occur, or can it happen in stages? I'm asking for a friend, naturally. _

_ There's been a slight development, a change, if you will, Rose. How can I explain it? After Kuai finished with me tonight and I fell asleep with him holding me, I woke up feeling less broken and more...what's the word I'm looking for here? No, of course, you wouldn't know. You only know what I do, right? _

_ Rose, I woke up feeling angry. So angry I could barely breathe, I could hardly see straight. I went to my studio and I attacked my painting like I was murdering someone, tearing another person apart with my bare hands, with a knife, with every weapon I could imagine; dream up. I could taste the blood in my mouth and I liked it, I wanted more. _

_ I still want more. But it isn't just the violence I thirst for, Rose. _

_ I barely sound like myself right now, huh? Who is this person writing such vitriol, such caustic ugliness? Surely it can't be me, not sheltered, meek, woebegone Jade; the prisoner locked up in the castle and forgotten by the world. How is it I could go to sleep as one person and wake up as someone completely different? Or is this angry, vengeful person the truth and the weak-willed, retiring Jade the lie? Maybe I'm both. _

_ Maybe I'm nothing. _

_ I feel like nothing, Rose. Did you know that? I'm a ghost, a lost girl, a forgotten loose end tucked away in a junk drawer. I'm the button or key that someone finds but can't think of a use for. _

_ I went into the garden tonight and it was so strange. I'm used to seeing the roses in daylight, but they're just as captivating by moonlight. They just seem different, quieter, almost poisonous. The thorns are more sinister under the stars, and I managed to catch my fingers on them, and the pain was the same as it is during the day. _

_ But, still, there was something frightening about leaving the house at night. And the thing is, I wasn't afraid of the dark or the potential for coming across a stranger, all the million other things one can fear after the sun goes down. I was terrified that Kuai would find me and punish me for daring to get out of bed and stray outside because of course he would worry and wonder and come looking for me. _

_ But, why? Why am I afraid of something like that? You know you've completely lost control of your life when you're almost too terrified to walk outside of your own house after midnight; unafraid of the monsters but fearing the one who's supposed to love you. _

_ I stood under the stars and just breathed in the night air, Rose. You should've seen the sky tonight, it was almost like I'd never seen it before; like I was seeing it with new, opened eyes. I'm sure I made a pretty picture, standing under the Milky Way streaking, no tearing, across the blue ceiling, there among the roses and just wondering where the fuck I can go from here. What are my options here, and how do I live with this growing rage? I looked to the sky and the stars sure as hell didn't have any answers; silent and cold and silver. It's like they weren't just hanging in the sky, they were dripping across it. _

_ I almost wish something had found me in the garden, something awful, something with claws and red eyes that would tear out my heart before Kuai could find me again. But that's crazy, isn't it? Sure, the wolf is always at the door but that doesn't mean I have to invite it inside...although I'm pretty sure I've already done that, haven't I? _

_ What am I even talking about right now, Rose? Anything at all? _

_ I'm almost certain I won't be able to go to work tomorrow. Not with the bruises on my face, not with the way my hands continue to shake. I feel like I'm always shaking like I have a constant chill that sits in my bones. Although, I did notice it disappearing for a while recently, Rose. Think: lemonade and a picnic table...arms covered with tattoos... _

_ Now I know I'm losing my mind. How could my brain even take a turn like that? Just because someone showed me some kindness? Am I that starved, that terribly hungry? I think it's just seeing Liu again, you know? His face and voice just pull me backward through the years, to better times, when anything seemed possible. _

_ You know, this is off topic but I just remembered something I hadn't thought about in ages. _

_ Liu Kang didn't come to our wedding, Rose. He sent me a letter (not even an email, an actual letter!) apologizing about being unable to attend, that his job had called him away and he wouldn't be back in time, and he sent a check that Kuai rolled his eyes at, but I've always held onto the letter. I have it in a stack of papers in the study, things I haven't gone through in ages. I remember being sad about him not being there, but I understood, you know? I was also so caught up in getting ready and being in love that I didn't dwell on it. _

_ But now it feels different and I don't know why. Maybe it's because I know he doesn't like Kuai. It isn't even a suspicion, Rose. I can feel it as surely as I can feel the bruises on my skin, the cuts from the roses on my hands. I'm overthinking things again, aren't I? Besides, Kuai doesn't like him either...but Kuai doesn't really care for most people. _

_ Which brings up another point, Rose. Kuai borders on being a misanthrope so I often wonder why he's so preoccupied with me. It's like he sank his teeth into me almost 6 years ago and he hasn't let go since...I don't think he ever will. Honestly, I don't think he can. Sometimes I feel like I'm the only thing keeping him from becoming completely - _

_ But he isn't crazy, Rose. I am. I have to be, right? I looked across the garden tonight, and I could see the iron gates and I wondered, why? Why can't I just walk across the grass and open those gates and leave? What's holding me here? Love? _

_ I do love Kuai; I do. I have to. If I didn't then none of this would even have a point, right? Does anything even have a point, though? Liu seemed like he had a point, Rose; a purpose. I mean, he didn't explicitly state it. Hell, I don't even know what he does for a living...it was just there in his demeanor, the way he spoke. It all seemed so healthy. _

_ God, I hope he doesn't go to the gallery tomorrow to see me, because I won't be there. I don't think he'd worry or anything, but I don't want him to waste his time. _

_ I can see dawn now, Rose. I need to pull myself together so I can see to Kuai; he'll be expecting me. _

_ I wouldn't want to disappoint him. _

_ Always and forever, _

_ Your Jade _

_ PS: I'm still not feeling your name. Sorry, sunshine...this is actually important to me, so it needs to be perfect. At least I have a say over something, small though it may be. _

_ PPS: God, I'm pathetic. Forgive me. _

********

"More coffee?" Jade asked, holding up the pot for Kuai to see; hand still trembling slightly.

Kuai nodded, pushing his cup in Jade's direction and watching closely as the dark brown stream flowed into the mug; its fragrance drifting around them both and filling up the chilled kitchen with a modicum of warmth. Jade almost flinched when Kuai reached up and brushed a hand over her cheek.

"They aren't as bad as I thought they would be," he commented. Pulling away, he waited for Jade to add the raw sugar and cream to the steaming coffee; he smiled lightly, tenderly.

Jade put the pot back and came to the table, carrying her own mug. She was amazed that she hadn't spilled anything yet, what with how shaky she still felt. The trembles always persisted for a while after Kuai punished her and today was no exception. She sat at the table and placed her cup down, taking care not to disturb Kuai's sprawling newspaper. Reaching up, she rested a hand against her slightly swollen cheek.

"No, they aren't. I was surprised," Jade replied, voice soft. "I don't think I'll even have a black eye this time, so, there's that."

"Did you already call work?" Kuai picked up the newspaper and turned to the sports section.

Feeling the faint stirring of anger, Jade bit the inside of her cheek and reached out to draw the red rose toward her; perfect and sweet-smelling in the crystal vase. Wordlessly, she began to caress the petals, admiring just how velvety they were.

"Jade?" Kuai asked, lowering the paper slightly; Jade watched in her peripheral, unwilling to look at her husband directly.

"Yes, I called," Jade whispered, somehow managing to keep the bitterness from his voice. She'd spoken to Kitana briefly on the phone; stomach upset, no big deal. She'd told her she hoped she felt better and that she'd (hopefully) see her on Monday. Have a nice weekend, she'd added at the end; Jade had had to bite back crazy laughter at the notion.

"Good." The paper went back up, Kuai's large hands gripping it lightly. Jade didn't care about any of it, didn't follow any teams or scores. She pretended to care for Kuai's sake.

"What are your plans for today now that you have some much-needed free time?"

Jade finally looked directly at her husband, the flame of anger intensifying as she began to worry the rose; red petals coming off in her fingers where she shredded them. Bits of the flower began to fall to the table in confetti strips, staining her skin red to match the wounds from the thorns.

"I already took care of the garden this morning but I'll..." she trailed off, plucking off another petal and tearing it into pieces. "I might plant another bush. Spice Twice. That's what it's called."

"Hmm, that sounds nice," Kuai replied, turning a page. "What color is it? Red, I hope."

_ Fuck your red roses, you sadistic - _

"They're a pinkish-orange," Jade said, tearing another petal; the flower was starting to become noticeably leaner, its flesh littering the table. "I'm sorry, Kuai. I should've gotten red but I liked the name."

"Don't apologize over something like that," Kuai smiled, finally putting the paper down and gazing at Jade with adoration until he saw the state of the rose in the crystal vase. "What are you doing?"

Jade looked down and feigned complete shock at what she'd done to the rose, quickly beginning to gather up the petals so she could throw them away.

"I-I'm sorry," she stammered, but she wasn't; she wasn't sorry at all. For the longest time, she'd loved the symbolism behind their morning red rose, but with every bruise and strike of the belt, she was growing to hate the idea, the lie. "I wasn't paying attention. I'll get another one from the garden."

Reaching out, Kuai took the decimated rose into his hand and stared at it, hard eyes softening slightly.

"Don't bother," he said. "The damage is done, I guess. Besides, there'll be a new one on the table tomorrow, right? We'll just start again."

These words rang through Jade's head like a death knell, the finality of them coupled with their long-standing implications...she shuddered openly.

"Kuai," she whispered, hardly believing what she intended to ask, to say. Jade hadn't spoken out of turn in years, not like this anyway. Not wanting to be still, she scooped the petals into her hand and went to throw the remnants away; taking care to keep some distance between herself and her husband.

"Hmm?" Kuai was still staring at the rose, nothing in his posture or bearing suggesting he was angry. If anything, he just seemed lost.

"Why?" Jade asked, gripping her long shirt in her hands and crushing the fabric. "Why did you...why did you punish me last night? What did I do?"

Kuai threw the rose down and pushed himself away from the table, turning to stare at Jade with empty eyes. For a moment they resembled one of Jade's canvases before she'd drenched it with paint.

"What kind of question is that?" Kuai asked, clasping his hands together; hands capable of caring for Jade as well as breaking her down. Hands that had reached into the chests of countless patients and repaired their hearts, even as he destroyed his wife's.

"I just need to know, Kuai," Jade replied, coming forward on bare feet. Grey shadows were falling across the kitchen floor, a summer rainstorm having started less than an hour before. Suddenly she could imagine roses drenched like fragile crepe paper, little dewdrops sliding down the green leaves; the smells of the musky earth filling him up and bringing her fleeting peace.

"I'm trying to get myself into a mental place where I can fucking do a heart transplant this morning, Jade," Kuai replied, the angry edge finally showing up in his voice and making Jade want to retreat to safety; not that it truly existed. "It's a procedure that takes, at minimum, four fucking hours, and you want to bother me with this bullshit? Seriously?"

Ordinarily, Jade would've stepped down, would've folded, but she just couldn't this time. The rage was spurning her on, as was the ongoing confusion of why? If Kuai loved her the way he said he did, then why did he hurt her? Jade couldn't possibly be that bad, could she? She just wanted to know what she was doing wrong so she could stop, so this wouldn't continue to happen; the basement, the belt, the other shoe always preparing itself to drop.

"I-it isn't b-bullshit," she stammered, trying to even out her voice. "I always feel like you're angry with me, even when things seem like they're okay. I just need to know what I can do to make you happy so you don't have to -"

She stopped, clenching her still shaking hands into trembling fists at her sides.

"So you don't have to keep hurting me. Just tell me, Kuai, and I'll do whatever you want. I promise."

Kuai stood and slowly walked over to Jade, almost appearing to be a stalking predator and Jade had to admit that in a lot of ways that's exactly what he was; a wolf, a shark, a monster walking through nightmares. He stopped before her, and for a moment it seemed like he was tensing up. Jade waited, either for a word or a strike, her breath trapped in her lungs.

But neither came, instead, Kuai gathered Jade into his arms and held her close, pressing a kiss against her hair. All at once, Kuai began swaying slightly, taking small steps around the kitchen, Jade still nestled against him.

"Remember on our honeymoon when you tried to teach me how to dance?" He asked, laughing a little. "I'm still hopeless at it, aren't I? I was never meant to dance, Jade; not like you, anyway. I remember watching you dance at Kung Lao's wedding and you looked so happy...Kung Lao waltzed you across the floor and I couldn't take my eyes off of you. Did you know that?"

"Really? You watched me?" Jade asked, looking up at him; falling into step as Kuai danced her around the room, the cold tiles pressing against her feet. "I never knew that. Why didn't you tell me?"

Kuai shrugged, holding Jade closer and sighing a little; whether from happiness or sadness, Jade couldn't tell.

"There are a lot of things I don't know how to say, so I guess that's when I," he became quiet, tensing up in Jade's arms. "Sometimes I feel like you're actively trying to get away from me, Jade. You wanted to work so I let you work, you wanted a life outside of what we have together, and I allowed that, too." Becoming still, he gazed down into Jade's eyes and he was surprised at how much sadness was there; those brown eyes that resembled a cold sea lapping a remote, out of the way beach.

"Haven't you ever felt something that was too big for you to handle? Like if you didn't act on it it would tear you apart? That's how I feel when it comes to you, and sometimes it becomes overwhelming. It's almost like I become this other person and when I come back to myself I look around and I find you crying or bleeding or..."

"In the basement," Jade murmured, closing her eyes so the tears wouldn't start to fall. "Are you saying that you hurt me because you love me, Kuai? I still don't understand."

"You have a way with words," Kuai replied, brushing some hair from Jade's eyes. "I don't, I never have. When I can't find the words I usually rely on actions. It isn't always the best way to be, but it makes sense at the moment. Sometimes it even feels right."

Jade pushed away, eyes still closed. She gripped Kuai's shirt and shook her head, not wanting to believe that the punishments stemmed from love; couldn't possibly accept that.

"Where is all of this coming from, anyway?" Kuai asked, still holding onto Jade though they'd stopped dancing. "You've never once asked me about any of this, Jade. Do I need to be concerned?"

"Do you remember the first time you hit me, Kuai? Like, really hit me?" Jade asked, countering with a question of her own; finally opening her eyes. It was almost like she was waking up from a dark enchantment, a spell breaking apart. She couldn't say what had been the catalyst, though she had her suspicions, or maybe her brain just wouldn't allow her to disregard reality anymore.

Kuai let go of her, eyes narrowing, and while they were still sad they were becoming calculating, too. For a moment, they flicked in the direction of the basement door.

"Yes, I remember," he murmured. "It was also during our honeymoon. You flirted with the waiter."

"I didn't flirt with him!" Jade shouted. "I thanked him for being so attentive, so on top of things! I was giving him a compliment!"

"Right, a compliment," Kuai sneered. "You practically gave him the key to our room. I'm surprised you didn't ask him to join us."

"So, an idle comment was enough reason to leave me covered with bruises? I had to wear a shirt into the ocean for the rest of the trip."

"That's fine with me," Kuai replied, reaching out and taking a hold of Jade again; yanking her close. "I'm the only one who should be looking at your body anyway. Don't you think? Unless of course you've been letting someone else in here when I'm gone, showing them what you have to offer."

"I've never done that!" Jade cried, trying to struggle away. "Why are you so convinced that I want to cheat on you?! I've never given you any indication that I want to leave, that I've ever been interested in anyone else!"

"That remains to be seen." Kuai hugged her, swaying slightly now; humming softly in the back of his throat. "God, I wish I didn't have to leave. Suddenly I'm feeling kind of aggressive. Can’t you tell?"

Wincing, Jade could feel Kuai's erection resting against her naked thigh, and could practically taste her husband's arousal and imminent rage. It always came back to this, this unholy fire that seemed to burn in Kuai's psyche; the part of him that thirsted for Jade's body and obedience. She also knew that this was usually the precursor for the basement, and she could hardly believe how provocative she'd been; she'd pulled the lion's tail and now she was paying for it.

"Why did you notice me at Kung Lao's wedding?" Jade whispered. "I'm a horrible dancer and you know it, Kuai; I don't have any rhythm whatsoever." She didn't ask the questions she really wanted an answer to: why did I seek you out at Lao's wedding? Why did I sit down next to you? Why did I start all of this?

"I noticed you long before that, Jade. Even when we were kids, but I never thought I had a chance." Kuai was kissing Jade's throat now, his hands pushing under Jade's shirt and coming to rest on her scar-covered back.

"But you had Skarlet," Jademurmured before she could stop herself. All at once, Kuai was pushing her away so hard that she collided with the counter, eliciting a pitiful yelp before falling to the floor. Looking up, she didn't have time to move away before Kuai was kicking her in the stomach, making her gasp wordlessly against the pain; clutching at herself and curling into a ball.

"I told you never to mention that fucking name, Jade," Kuai seethed, reaching down and taking a hold of Jade's shirt, yanking her up and close to her face. He shook her slightly. "What's gotten into you today? Huh? Do you want me to punish you? Do you fucking get off on it or what?"

"No, I don't," Jade sobbed, going slack as Kuai continued to throttle her. "But I know y-you do, don't you? You always have."

Abruptly, Kuai dropped Jade to the floor with a thud and he stood, glaring down at her.

"Usually I can't get enough of your fire, Jade, but this won't do; at all. I refuse to live in a house filled with discord, so you better fucking straighten up by tonight. Do you understand?"

Jade refused to respond, biting her lip and fighting the urge to rub her throbbing back. All at once, Kuai took a hold of her hair and yanked on it, forcing her to look up and regard him.

"I asked you a question," Kuai said, eyes blazing. "I expect an answer. Now."

He shook her again, still holding onto Jade's hair.

"I understand," Jade bit out, angry tears forming in her eyes and falling.

"We seriously need to discuss that job of yours, Jade. We need to discuss everything, don't we? I'm noticing a change in your attitude lately and honestly, I'm not thrilled about it. At all." Letting go of her hair, he caressed Jade's cheek with so much softness it almost made her want to scream; what was the truth?! What was the lie?!

He moved away, still staring at Jade while loosening the belt on his robe.

"I need to go take a shower and start moving or I'm going to be late," he said, rolling his eyes. "Get yourself together and take your medicine, okay? I think you need to sleep for a while because you aren't acting like yourself. I'll be home late tonight but we'll still have time to eat dinner and have a little talk. A nice, long talk." His eyes strayed back to the basement door and Jade began to tremble openly.

"How does that sound?"

Jade could only nod her head, shakily beginning to collect herself before reaching up and using the counter to pull herself up. Kuai went to Jade's messenger bag on the counter and Jade had to fight back the urge to lunge at it, not wanting him to discover her diary in the secret pocket. Instead, Kuai lifted out her Klonopin and set it down next to one of Jade's trembling hands.

"Take it," Kuai instructed, beginning to turn away. "You need it."

******

The scent of Kuai's body wash had barely disappeared by the time Jade was stepping out of the house and into the mid-summer drizzle; steam rising faintly from the grass. The sky was white and grey with gathered clouds but he didn't want to stay in the house for another moment. She'd also forgone Kuai's command that she take her medication and go to sleep. Jade didn't want to be doped up, she didn't want to sleep; she wanted to be awake and out in the world.

Kuai had pressed a hard kiss against Jade's mouth before leaving for the hospital, had looked into his eyes, and had almost appeared repentant, but it was temporary. Everything was temporary when it came to Kuai, other than his anger, his need for control. On some level, Jade believed that Kuai's love was also eternal, at least what he considered love, and its strength was just part of the problem; it was the driving force behind all of the misery.

Jade scooped up the Twice Spicebush and carried it to the corner of the garden in need of being filled, and she lay it down carefully. Standing there in her old jeans and light t-shirt, sunglasses on, and gloves on her hands, she almost felt normal for a moment. Breathing deeply, she took the scent of rainfall, grass, and turned earth into her lungs, wishing she could bottle the aroma and carry it with her always. She always derived comfort from the fruits of the earth, its quiet stillness, its strength that didn't need to be destructive in order to make a point. The earth simply was, and it was okay to just be when you stood surrounded by nature.

Getting to work, Jade began digging a nice-sized hole, turning the soft earth over and becoming elated that her thoughts were quieting. The house was full of dead, static air and more often than not there was nothing to fill up the emptiness, but that didn't stop Jade's thoughts from screaming at her a lot of the time. Sometimes she needed to think, to ruminate, but more often than not her thoughts turned down dark alleys and she just couldn't stomach what she stood to find. The mind was truly a dangerous neighborhood, and she just couldn't stand facing it alone.

She didn't want to think about Kuai's words, his promises, of the impending trip to the basement because she knew it was coming. Kuai didn't explicitly state it, but she knew; they both did. For a lot of people, the roads of destruction led to drugs or alcohol, to self-mutilation or dangerous choices, but Jade's road led down dank steps and into the clinical whiteness her husband had built; silver trays holding instruments that in the right hands, could heal the body, but in the basement, they mended secret horrors.

Almost without thinking about it, Jade reached up and rubbed at her back, easing the ache there as well as the ghosts of the past. No one ever saw her with her shirt off anymore (except for Kuai, of course) but if they'd been able to they would have so many questions, questions she could never find the words to answer without becoming sick. Idly, she pushed thoughts of the basement away, of Kuai's unsettling explanation for his behavior, and just became lost in the act of tending to the garden; hands deep in the fragrant earth. The rain continued to fall steadily, but it was bearable, providing a refreshing backdrop that smacked of renewal.

She worked until she started to notice faint hunger pangs, having not really had anything for breakfast other than coffee. Jade usually couldn't stomach too much of anything the morning after a punishment, so by the time lunch rolled around her appetite was out in full force. Standing back, she admired the pretty Twice Spicebush, its blooms small but holding intense promise, the petals a soft orange-pink almost resembling a sunset.

It's like the garden in my head; the sunset over the ocean, she mused, admiring her work. The garden I'll be visiting again before too long.

Turning, she noticed that the rain had finally abated, and she removed her gloves, throwing them down in the soft grass. She'd go inside and have a sandwich before coming back out, her eyes straying over the other rose bushes. Jade had pruned them that morning but she really needed to attend to the weeds, which were cropping up in droves. The latest rainfall certainly wasn't going to help that situation.

She'd nearly made it to the door when she heard something, a voice calling, and she looked around; startled.

"Jade! Over here!"

Jade's eyes widened behind her sunglasses to see Liu Kang standing at the gate, waving to her. His truck was parked behind him, idling at the curb. Almost feeling like a shy, skittish animal, Jade slowly started walking toward the gate, suddenly remembering how she'd contemplated doing that very thing the night before. Just walking to the gate and passing through, escaping. She waved the idea away, the very insanity of it. Coming close but not daring to approach the gate properly, she stopped.

"What are you doing here?" She asked, brushing hair from her forehead. Jade hadn't felt the need to greet Liu, not with the fear sinking into her blood and already making her feel weak.

Liu just stared at her for a moment, dressed in a hoodie and dark jeans. Jade almost flushed to notice that she wasn't wearing dress shoes this time, a pair of Adidas on his feet instead. Why had she even noticed this small detail?

"You weren't at work," Liu said, reaching up and taking a hold of the gate, almost looking like he was a prisoner in an old-fashioned jail. Jade almost wanted to laugh, but she couldn't bring herself to. "So, I thought I'd drop by."

"I'm sick," Jade said, simply.

"You don't look sick," Liu countered, peering at Jade with shrewd brown eyes. His tone wasn't combative, merely observant.

Jade snorted, already beginning to feel annoyed - and cornered. She hated feeling cornered.

"Sorry. If I could I'd throw up right in front of you, but I can't just do it on a whim."

"Wiseass," Liu Kang snickered, still holding onto the gate. He studied Jade for a moment, smiling a little as the sun broke from the clouds and washed over them both; shafts of light trapping themselves in Liu's hair and making it gleam.

"You still haven't told me what you're doing here," Jade said, daring to come just a little bit closer. She desperately hoped the bruises on her face weren't immediately obvious. She hadn't looked that bad this morning, and Kuai had even said they looked okay, but still -

"Did you want to go grab some lunch?" Liu asked, abruptly. "I'll even let you buy this time, and you can pick the place."

Jade was momentarily still, just mulling the suggestion over. Every rational, sane part of her brain preoccupied with self-preservation told her to say no but the hungrier parts, the angry parts, told her to say yes; just go, be free for a moment. She recalled the rage she'd felt while she worked on her painting, as she stood in the nighttime garden...the fire that had become present in her blood as she questioned Kuai that morning, and all at once she just wanted to throw open the gate and run. Instead, she remained in the same place, feeling the cool winds ruffling his hair.

"Really? I get to buy?" She finally asked, smirking a little.

"Sure, why not? It doesn't look like you're hurting for cash," Liu commented, glancing behind Jade and taking in the expansive grounds, the lavish, gigantic house.

"What an artless thing to say," Jade frowned. "I'm surprised you'd want to eat anything that was purchased with Kuai's money."

"Then we won't use his money," Liu replied, shrugging. "We'll use yours, the money you make at the gallery."

"Fair point," Jade murmured. "Fine, I guess that'd be okay, but I have to be home before too long, okay? I still have to -"

"Relax, Cinderella," Liu Kang cut her off, holding up a hand. "I'll have you home from the ball before too long, okay? Prince Charming will never even know you were gone."

That's what I'm banking on, Jade thought, finally closing the gap between herself and the gate; tentative feet carrying her closer to Liu.

******

"So, you like to garden?"

Jade glanced up from her latte, the creamy tan liquid steaming flagrantly as she blew on it. Liu Kang was sitting across from her, elbows on the table as he rested his cheek in his hand, a cup of black coffee sitting before him; steam curling upward. They were sitting in a small cafe that Jade was particularly fond of, the atmosphere quiet and intimate as people spoke in hushed voices. Vaguely, she was aware of James Arthur playing over the sound system, singing about someone's love being more than worth its weight in gold.

"It passes the time," she finally said, glancing out the window. It had started to rain again, but she could tell that the sun was waiting in the wings; getting ready to shine. The raindrops slid down the glass and she watched them, placing a finger against the chilled surface.

"Passes the time, huh?" Liu replied, taking a sip of coffee. "Aren't roses hard to grow, though? That doesn't just seem like a casual hobby."

"It's casual enough."

Liu Kang was quiet for a moment, taking a bite of the most rugged thing on the menu: ham and cheddar on country white bread. He chewed and swallowed, peering at Jade with curious eyes.

"Aren't you going to take your sunglasses off?"

"Why does it matter?" Jade sighed, picking at her salad; chicken Caesar, no croutons.

Liu shrugged, taking another bite of his sandwich.

"I was looking forward to seeing your pretty green eyes. Is that a crime?"

Jade blushed before she could help herself, dropping her fork and taking a tremulous sip of her latte; burning her tongue. She winced a little. Liu laughed lightly.

"Sorry, didn't mean to catch you off guard there."

"You aren't sorry at all," Jade replied, sitting back and crossing her arms. "You're a shameless flirt, though."

"Guilty as charged," Liu Kang conceded, finishing off the sandwich and licking his fingers. "But I meant it."

"I'm sure you did," Jade muttered, picking up her fork and stabbing a piece of chicken. She brought it to her mouth and chewed slowly, eyes straying back to the window for a moment. Sighing, she finally reached up and removed her sunglasses, setting them aside. She waited with bated breath, her heartbeat picking up, for Liu Kang to make a comment. She'd suffered through a multitude of clueless, well-meaning comments over the years; what was one more?

"That's better," Liu Kang grinned, looking into Jade's eyes and appearing genuinely pleased. "I was starting to feel like I was eating lunch with Roy Orbison." He studied Jade for a moment. "They're even prettier when you blush. Did you know that?"

Jade could only stare at him, completely taken aback that Liu hadn't said something about the bruises on her face. They were obvious, weren't they? The whole fucking world could see them, why else would she be wearing sunglasses in a cafe?

"Cut the crap, Liu," she said, gripping the table until her hands ached.

Liu Kang blinked, surprised.

"What?"

"I'm married, okay?" Jade said, holding up her hand so her wedding ring was on full display. "Why are you flirting with me? Complimenting me? Why do you keep seeking me out? Huh?"

Liu leaned forward and took hold of Jade's hand, the contact-making her blush hotter. His finger strayed over the platinum ring, catching the weak sunlight finding its way through parted clouds. Jade had expected her questions to make him angry, but instead, he just appeared thoughtful, pensive.

"Kuai Liang," he murmured, inspecting the ring; rough hands clutching Jade's with a surprising amount of tenderness. "I never understood that you know; you two together."

"Is that why you didn't come to our wedding?" Jade asked, pulling her hands away when she couldn't stand the contact anymore; couldn't handle how warm it made her feel.

"Partially, I guess, but I also had to work," Liu replied, eyes lingering on Jade's wedding ring. "I told you that in the letter, Jade. What, did Kuai not let you read it?"

"Of course he let me read it. What does that even mean?"

"Think about it," Liu said.

"I am, and it still doesn't make any sense." Jade clenched her hands around her coffee cup, staring into the liquid-like she thought the answers were swirling in its depths. She wasn't used to this observant, ambiguous Liu Kang. Where was the guy she'd known so long ago?

"They're worried about you down at the gallery," Liu said. "Kitana, Erron, Kung Lao...they just want you to be okay."

"I am okay."

Liu Kang nodded, placing his hands flat on the table; studying them. Jade stared at them too, admiring how tan they were, how sturdy. They appeared strong like Liu's but in a different way, calling to mind Liu's salt of the earth personality; how he gave off the vibe that he chopped wood every morning before breakfast. The idea made Jade smile against her will.

"What do you think of those photos you got on the wall there?" Liu asked, still looking down at his hands. "Kitana told me you got a random shipment a while ago, and those photos were inside."

"I love them," Jade replied without hesitation, genuine enthusiasm leaking into her tone. She was anxious to talk with someone about the photos because she admired them so much, but she'd never been able to do that with Kuai. What was the point? Kuai could be indulgent but Jade also knew she thought of the arts as being mostly derivative. Besides, her love for the photographs was so personal; there was no way she could share that with her husband, he'd just find a way to sully it, discredit it. That's why she hadn't been able to reveal her favorite when she'd been asked.

"Really?" Liu Kang grinned, leaning forward a little. "Which one's your favorite?"

"The lighthouse, no question," Jade said, becoming animated; having absolutely no issue with displaying her inner-workings to her old friend. She always became excited when she talked about something that had touched her on a personal level, and the lighthouse had spoken to her; something profound waking up in her numbed mind. "It makes me want to run away somewhere if that makes any sense. I just wonder where the picture was taken. If I knew, I'd go there." She laughed, tucking a hair behind her ear. What was she even saying?

"Les Éclaireurs," Liu Kang said, softly.

"What?"

"Les Éclaireurs," Liu repeated, eyes becoming faraway. "The lighthouse at the end of the world. It's off the coast of Argentina, near the southernmost city in the world."

"How do you know that?" Jade asked, eyes widening with surprise and secret, growing charm. Liu Kang just seemed to be full of surprises.

"Easy," Liu shrugged. "I took the picture, Jade. I took all of those pictures."

"No way," Jade breathed, hardly able to comprehend what she was being told. Liu, her Liu, the perverted kid with the weird sense of humor and inability to ever take anything seriously, had taken the photographs she'd fallen in love with? The idea was too surreal for her to even make sense of it. Pushing her food away, Jade reached out and this time she took hold of Liu's hands, startling him.

"Why didn't you sign them? Why didn't you ask for payment? They're beautiful, you deserve recognition!"

Liu looked down at Jade's small hands gripping his own and he smiled slowly, brown eyes filling up with so much tenderness they nearly seemed to change colors.

"I think this is all the payment and recognition I need," he replied, almost appearing shy at that moment. "I was hoping you'd like them."

"I don't understand."

Liu Kang looked sheepish for a moment, though the soft look in his eyes didn't fade away.

"I've kept in touch with Kung Lao for years, Jade. I knew a long time ago that you were working at the gallery, so...I wanted to send you something."

"Those were for me? But...but you asked me where I worked. You acted like you didn't know."

"I didn't want to weird you out by letting you know I was kind of sort of keeping tabs on you. That's part of the reason I didn't sign them, but I also didn't need anyone else to know I'd taken them, you know? They're for you."

"Why didn't you just -" Jade stopped, fading away. She was going to ask why Liu hadn't just mailed them to her home, but she thought she already knew the answer. She shook her head, trying to take all of this information in.

"Why have you been keeping tabs on me? You didn't need to do that, Liu."

"Lao and I disagree, Jade," Liu Kang replied, drawing away and crossing his arms; his expression hardened until he almost resembled Kuai when he was working himself into a rage. "We aren't blind, you know, and we aren't stupid, even if Kuai would disagree."

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Jade replied tremulously, standing abruptly from the table. She ignored the pain radiating through her back and stomach, not wanting to arouse Liu's concern like last time. "I'm ready to go. I need to go. Now."

"Okay, okay. Relax," Liu said, standing as well and holding his hands up in a placating gesture; almost like he was gentling a startled animal. "It's okay. We can go."

Hurriedly, feeling like she was almost coming out of her skin, Jade rushed out of the cafe and over toward Liu Kang's truck, pulling at the handle and becoming nervous and angry when the door wouldn't open. Leaning against the truck, she covered her face with her hands and had to stop herself from crying, counting backward from ten as the Chopin nocturnes filled up her brain; convinced that everyone passing by, even Liu Kang, could see into her thoughts and figure out the truth; the horrors waiting there.

"Jade, calm down," Liu said, putting a hand on her shoulder and making her recoil. "Hey, wait! Did I hurt you? I'm sorry."

"No, no. Of course not. I'm fine. Fine," Jade said, faintly aware that the rain had died down and the sun was shining at the same time; rainbow weather. "I just need to get in the truck, please. I don't want to be out here anymore."

"Sure, hold on." Liu quickly unlocked the door and opened it for Jade, who slid in and huddled in the seat, shivering slightly. Liu Kang went around the truck and got in behind the wheel, turning to Jade with a look of utter compassion and confusion on his face. He held up Jade's sunglasses. "You forgot these on the table."

"Thanks," Jade said, softly; taking the glasses and slipping them back on, almost wishing she could disappear into the darkness. "I'm sorry I left so suddenly, I just..."

She looked down at her hands, fighting back the tears burning behind her eyes.

"I don't know," she whispered, unable to offer up a better explanation.

"Hey, Jade. It's okay. I promise. Everything is okay. You don't need to keep apologizing to me."

"Kuai said the same thing, about the stupid roses. The fucking red roses," Jade seethed, unable to stop herself from letting out some of the bitterness. She slapped a hand over her mouth, her voice muffled when she spoke again.

"Don't listen to me. I sound crazy, don't I? I should probably take something." Fishing in her pocket, Jade withdrew the bottle of Klonopin. Just because she'd been defiant and hadn't taken it when Kuai wanted her to, didn't mean she could disobey completely. But wasn't that exactly what she was doing anyway? Being out with Liu Kang like this? Suddenly everything was too surreal and topsy turvy, and she was hurriedly opening the bottle and swallowing a yellow pill; the bitterness barely touched her tongue.

"He's got you taking pills?" Liu Kang asked, eyeing the bottle with extreme distaste. "Jade, you don't need -"

"Don't fucking tell me what I need, Liu! I don't need that from you, too!" Jade suddenly yelled, almost feeling like she was coming unglued. She was just so tired of being told what to do, even by the people who meant well. She didn't need it, she didn't want it. She wanted to be free, she just wanted to -

Jade checked the positioning of the sun, fear flooding her in a poisonous tide.

"I need to go home," she said, turning to Liu and clutching at the front of her shirt. "Please, please just take me home!"

Liu Kang peered out at the sun too, which was finally breaking away from the clouds even as smatterings of rainfall fell softly.

"We've barely been out for an hour, Jade. Just relax, it's going to be -"

"No, it isn't going to be okay! Stop saying that! You have no idea what you're talking about!" Hunching forward, all of the terror converged on Jade at once and suddenly all she wanted was to be at home among the roses, lost in the silence and waiting for Liu to come back. Even if they went immediately to the basement, at least Jade wouldn't feel so horribly afraid, because she'd know what to expect. Out here, with Liu, she didn't know what was going to happen, and she hated it.

Liu didn't speak, opting instead to settle a gentle hand on Jade's aching back, and it was this small bit of softness that pushed Jade over the edge. Without warning, she started to cry quietly into her hands. She wept about the pain, the fear, the unknowns...she wept over the lonely lighthouse Liu had brought her, the years unfolding and drenched in blood and quiet desperation; she cried about it all, and once she started he couldn't stop.

"Just take me home. Please," she whispered, hating herself for her vulnerability; her weakness. At that moment, Jade hated everything about herself.

"Okay," Liu Kang murmured, starting the truck; his hand never leaving Jade's back as she continued to sob.

******

"We're here."

Jade looked up, almost sagging with relief to see the house looming before them, the roses fluttering in the early afternoon breeze. Her home had never looked so beautiful to her, and she turned to Liu with a smile of gratitude; buoyed by the fact that Kuai's car was nowhere to be seen.

"You must think I've completely lost my mind," she said, resting her hand on the door handle. "I promise I'm not always this emotional. I'm just having kind of a weird day."

Liu Kang studied her for a moment, his hand still lingering on Jade's back; fingers bunching up in the material of her t-shirt.

"I don't think you've lost your mind, Jade," he said. "I just think you're afraid."

The Klonopin was seeping into her blood now and making her lose, slightly off-kilter, and Jade couldn't help but wave away Liu Kang's words.

"I'm not afraid of anything. You should know me better than that."

"I used to think I knew you pretty well," Liu replied, taking his hand from Jade's back and tracing a finger over her cheeks; across the bruises resting there. "But now I'm not so sure."

Jade was tired of being serious, of focusing on the awful things in her life. Instead, she tried to move the conversation in a different direction; ignoring the questions in Liu's eyes. She didn't want to talk about the bruises, anyway. For a moment, she wanted nothing more than to pretend that they didn't exist in the first place.

"Do you take photos for a living? Like, for a magazine? Is that why you were in New York City, too?" Jade asked, becoming excited even as her brain lapsed into the fuzzy, muted quality it assumed when Klonopin was careening through her system.

Liu laughed lightly, touching the bruises one last time before taking his hand away; gazing at Jade with an easygoing expression that took her to the past when things were safe and simple.

"I do a lot of freelancing, Jade, but yeah, I've worked for a couple of magazines. National Geographic, Time, whatever. It isn't any big deal."

"It's a huge deal! Are you crazy? What you're doing with your life is amazing! You should be so proud," Jade gushed, smiling openly now. "I'm proud of you. Did you know that?"

"It's all I ever could've wanted," Liu quipped, flushing a little even though his smile grew exponentially. He almost appeared bashful, which amused Jade to no end.

"I've got you blushing," she teased, poking Liu in the side and making him arch slightly. "Look who's shy all of a sudden."

"Who's shy?" Liu groused, rubbing his side and blushing an even deeper shade of red.

"Will you take me to that lighthouse someday?" Jade asked playfully, reaching out and poking Liu Kang again and making him yelp. "I want to see it in person."

"Hey, cut it out," Liu said, wrapping his arms around himself so Jade couldn't poke him in the ribs again. "Besides, you can only get there by boat."

"Is that a fact?" Jade said, thinking of the idea and automatically falling in love with it; a lonely lighthouse perched on an island somewhere, waiting for curious onlookers to arrive at its shores. It was almost like a siren sending out its call to the universe. "The lighthouse at the end of the world," she murmured, the Klonopin winding through her in chemical ribbons and rendering her pliable and sleepy. "What a lovely idea. I'm so glad you brought it to me; I never even knew it existed."

"I guess you could say I wanted to show you the world," Liu said, rubbing the back of his neck and looking so young and suddenly unsure that Jade could feel herself becoming even more relaxed; the feeling not even the byproduct of her anti-anxiety medication.

"How did you get to be so sweet? Huh?" She asked, reaching up and boldly pushing some of Liu's hair off his forehead. She studied him for a moment. "Someone needs a haircut, by the way."

"Sweet? Me? Hardly," Liu Kang scoffed, trying to assume an air of toughness and failing terribly. "I'm a bad boy, Jade. You know that."

"Right," Jade replied, rolling her eyes. "Only a sensitive soul could take such beautiful pictures. I know this for a fact."

"I don't doubt it." Liu gazed at her for a moment, and all at once Jade found her heart pounding wildly, and suddenly the cab of the truck felt far too small. Fumbling for the door handle again, she opened it up and began to slide out.

"I should probably be going. I wanted to weed the beds and I still have to make dinner. Kuai will be home before too long, so -"

Liu climbed out as well and came around the truck, his hands tucked in his pockets as the wind blew his hair around; leaving it a wild mess that Jade wanted to pass her fingers through again. She ignored the impulse, chastising herself for being so reckless, even if it was just in her head.

"I'll stop by again soon. If that's okay," Liu murmured. "Will you be at work on Monday?"

"Definitely," Jade replied, though she couldn't be sure. Depending on Kuai's temperament that evening, she had no idea what shape she was going to be in when Monday rolled around. Liu didn't need to know that, of course. Besides, just the thought of having a visitor filled her with a raw hope that was almost painful, even though she knew on a rational level that she should be terrified. A sudden thought struck her as she gazed across the grounds, at the roses glowing under the sunshine breaking through.

"Hold on, I'll be right back," Jade said, going to the gate and punching in the passcode. She glanced back at Liu Kang and grinned to see him watching her curiously. Finally, the gates parted and she ran across the grass, snagging a pair of garden shears and quickly snipping a few of her favorites, including the largest of the Spice Twice's. Coming back, she shyly held out the colorful bouquet to Liu, waiting for him to rip into her for giving him flowers.

Instead, Liu took them into his hands and held them so gently you'd think he was nestling a baby bird across his palms.

"I can keep these?" He asked, looking up at Jade with admiration. "Really?"

"Well, sure. Yeah," J ade replied, placing her hands behind her back and kicking at the ground. She smiled with pleasure, feeling warm and pleasant and safe; the sunshine striking her hair and shoulders. "Do you like them?"

"They're beautiful," Liu Kang said. He lifted them to his face and breathed deeply. Turning, he opened the door to his truck and laid the blooms carefully on the set. Jade came over to peer behind him, touched that Liu was being so gentle with the flowers. Liu glanced at her and before Jade could respond, he was running his fingers through Jade's windswept hair.

"I'll take you to Les Eclaireurs someday, by the way," he murmured. "If you really want to go."

"You promise?" Jade asked, hardly recognizing her voice; it's soft, almost sensual quality. What was happening right now?

Suddenly, Liu was putting his hands on Jade's waist and pressing her up against the truck, backing her into the cab where the roses lay; their fragrance rising in a cloud around them when Jade's weight settled against them. Jade stared up at him with wide eyes, Liu's own looking at her with such raw need, such open, needful intent that she almost became breathless.

"What are you doing? Liu," Jade said, reaching up and pressing her hand against Liu's chest; pushing him back. She shook her head.

"I can't do this, Liu. Please understand. Please." She looked at her old friend with beseeching eyes, fear borne in her brain from what she'd almost allowed to happen.

For a moment, only a second really, Jade almost thought that Liu was going to continue anyway, his hands still pressing into Jade's skin and holding her close. Oddly enough, she didn't feel any fear of this, though a deep pervasive shame bloomed in her brain; how the knowledge of her betrayal would destroy Kuai completely.

"I'm sorry, Jade," Liu said, pulling away and rubbing his face with his hands, relinquishing his hold on Jade's waist. "I don't know what I was thinking."

"Don't apologize, please," Jade replied, sliding down from the seat and looking back at the roses, trying to arrange them so they wouldn't appear so flattened down. "I'm not mad, okay? Please come back to see me."

"I'll come tomorrow if you want."

Jade began to back toward the gate, which was still open and waiting to swallow her up. She shook her head, thoughts of the basement's horrors waiting for her in the dark tangle of her grey matter. She wouldn't be able to receive visitors the next day, she already knew that, and even though Liu seemed to have a vague understanding of the deeper implications in all of this, he didn't need to see the extent of Kuai's potential savagery.

"Come visit me at work on Monday," She said, smiling as the sunshine finally came out in full force; lighting up the world until it almost burned. "I promise I'll be there. Waiting for you."

******

_ Dear Rose, (I'll stick with that name for now, okay? Maybe I'll get used to it.) _

_ This entry won't be long, mainly because Kuai will be back before too long (he's in the shower; I guess he worked up a sweat...among other things) and it's hard to hold the pen for very long; everything hurts. We went to the basement tonight, just like I knew we would, but that isn't important right now, Rose. _

_ I wanted to tell you that I fell asleep in the sunshine after Liu left, just laid down in the grass and closed my eyes (only for a moment!) and before too long Kuai was waking me up and bringing me into the house, the smell of the grass in my clothes and hair covering up Liu's cologne...at least I hope it did. He was none the wiser about my outing today (thank God) but it left me breathless, Rose. For a moment I felt so happy (and so afraid) that I couldn't wait to tell you. If I hadn't been so loopy from my medicine I would've already written everything out, but as it stands, I won't have time until tomorrow. _

_ Rose, I think Liu wanted to kiss me, but I stopped him. Can you believe that? I have no idea where any of this is coming from, but he looked at me like he wanted me...I know that look, or at least I think I do. Kuai still looks at me like that on occasion. It isn't predatory, just sweet and full of longing, but I never would've expected it from Liu Kang of all people. _

_ Hold on. The shower stopped. I need to go, Rose. _

_ Always and Forever, _

_ Your Jade _

_ PS: I know this is crazy, but I kind of wanted Liu to kiss me, Rose. _

_ PPS: God, I wish I had let him kiss me. _

_ PPPS: Maybe next time? _

_ PPPPS: Will there be a next time?? _


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No trigger warnings, i mean there's smut but other than that no more.

_Dear Rose, (I'm starting to warm up to the name. What about you?)_

_I have to apologize in advance, love; I didn't get a chance to write in you yesterday for a number of reasons. First and foremost, Kuai was home all day, and he was being very...attentive, so I really didn't have enough time to myself to attend to you the way you deserve, and secondly, I was just too shaky still; and the pain just wouldn't let me concentrate. I'm feeling better today and Kuai is working out right now, so I finally (finally) have a moment to stop and reflect._

_I should explain my comment about Kuai being attentive, shouldn't I? I mean, I've touched on this in the past, but Kuai is very doting after a basement trip. Whether it's from guilt or just wanting to be close to me, to see to my needs, I'm not sure. I'm thinking it may be a column A, column B situation, but at any rate, Kuai is practically attached to my hip the day after intense punishments (or 'corrections' as he likes to call them). He also wasn't on call this weekend, so...he has a lot of free time on his hands, and when he has free time that basically means he's on me like white on rice._

_I mean, I'm not complaining, of course. Kuai is so wonderfully sweet after he's gotten the poison out of his system. I almost think of it as him having his humor balanced. He'd think I was crazy for even writing that, after all, from his clinical point of view that point in history where people thought the human body was comprised of 4 substances that needed to be balanced through bloodletting (black bile, yellow bile, phlegm, and blood) was rather a dark period in medicine (though western medicine is still very focused on balance, which can be somewhat attributed to humorist) - but, no, I really do think that when Kuai takes me to the basement he's able to purge himself of something foul, so he can begin again (and by extension, so can I)._

_That's not to say I enjoy going to the basement. Quite the contrary, actually; it's hell on earth. I keep thinking that if I go down there and start searching I'll find the gateway to Hades or something, but that would just be crazy, right? I've never really gone into excessive detail about what goes on down there, and I probably should so you'll know what I've endured and will continue to endure. Honestly, I'm pretty proud of myself...at least I know what I'm capable of, and it's a lot! I really don't want to drench you with the violence I've suffered through, so I'll break it down to a level I can stomach, how's that?_

_Imagine an operating room, okay? Sterile and white and hushed, white floor, white walls...just whiteness all around, and there's an exam table in the center; fluorescent lights above, caustic, cruel lighting that cuts through your eyes even when they're closed. Everything must be just so, and Kuai makes sure it's always stocked with clean instruments on silver trays, and the kidney-shaped bowls shine so brightly, sitting on the rack that's easily wheeled around the room. It's all very impressive, really, and I'm amazed that Kuai put it together almost entirely by himself. I mean, he had contractors set up the bare bones of the basement but the rest, the rest he did all on his own._

_My first trip to the basement happened 3 years, 10 months, and 19 days ago, Rose, but I'll never forget it...after I woke up, of course. It was a Thorazine situation and I hadn't even realized Kuai had been working on such a project, his personal operating room until I opened my eyes and found myself propped against the basement wall wearing the handcuffs. I resisted at first, of course, completely out of my mind with terror, until Kuai very calmly explained to me what was about to happen. (So much like a doctor, Rose; he acted like I was one of his patients ready to go under the knife, and I suppose in a lot of ways that was the case.) That's not to say I wasn't still horribly afraid, but somehow, over the years, he's been able to convince me that all of this is necessary. I disobey, Rose, and I must be brought to task. Right?_

_It happened because I hung out with Kitana without Kuai's knowledge or permission. We hadn't been married for very long and I still thought things were a certain way when in actuality they were something else entirely. That was before I truly understood the parameters of our relationship, but I was a quick study, Rose; a very quick study._

_I know exactly what you're thinking, Rose. It's written all over your pages, your imaginary face, that one lingering, very important, monumental question:_

**_Why haven't I left?_ **

_Even after all of the basement trips, being all but cut off from my good friends and family, just everything...why am I still here? Well, that is a fucking fantastic question, isn't it? Usually, when I come back to this inquiry (which I do - often), I remind myself of a number of quotes by Sigmund Freud:_

_“We are never so defenseless against suffering as when we love.”_

_"Out of your vulnerabilities will come your strength.”_

_“One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful.”_

_And lastly, possibly the most important:_

_“Most people do not really want freedom, because freedom involves responsibility, and most people are frightened of responsibility.”_

_Doesn't paint a very pretty or flattering portrait, does it? At the end of the day, I think that encapsulates my personality, and my ongoing devotion to a person that most people would call a monster (myself included, depending on the day). Essentially, Rose, I am a frightened, vulnerable person...I'm vulnerable because I am in love with Kuai, almost irrevocably so, and I can't say why that is. Is it because there's something in him that I see that no one else can, or is it because I know the person he could be if all of the poison was leeched from his blood? I think a lot of my love stems from the glimmers of good that I see in him, and there's quite a bit, Rose; there really is._

_One might say that I'm even preoccupied or obsessed with my own suffering, and maybe, just maybe, on some level, I kind of get off on being perceived as this tragic, woebegone figure that must do battle with evil on a regular basis. I was always prone to having a Messiah complex, especially in my younger years...I had to save everyone, which is pathetic considering I can't (won't) even save myself. I have to be somewhat strong though, right? A weak person couldn't survive all of this and find a reason to keep going, or am I wrong? (I usually am.)_

_You must excuse me, Rose. I always lapse into a brown study after I emerge from the basement. It just gives me so much to think about. I will say there was something different about our trip this time, though. The anger that's starting to thread its way through my blood is still present, and growing stronger, and when I grit my teeth against the pain and closed my eyes this time, guess whose face I saw in the darkness? Think: black hair, brown eyes, tattoos on strong arms..._

_I didn't just think about his characteristics, Rose. No, I could remember the way he held me as he pushed me into the cab of his truck, the smells of sweet Twice Spice's surrounding us...the aroma transporting me back to a moment when I was afraid but for a good reason, a beautiful one._

_He told me he wanted to take me to the end of the world. Me, Rose. Poor, pathetic, confused Jade. He wanted to kiss me, I know it; I can feel it. It's almost like this knowledge rests in my bones, along with the chill that comes with the idea of the basement; of Kuai's easy cruelty. We stood in the sunshine and he wanted to kiss me, but I couldn't let him do it. I still don't know if I could, but I think I'd like it if he did._

_I just wouldn't like the guilt that would inevitably follow. Say what you will about my weaknesses, but I still wouldn't want to hurt Kuai if I could absolutely help it._

_Does that make me crazy? Probably so._

_Liu Kang, what are you doing to me? How could you come out of nowhere and drop into my life like this? How could you change things so quickly, like a stone being thrown into a pond and creating so many ripples? You sent me those gorgeous photos from parts of the world I could only dream of, and it's almost like you've woken me from a hundred years' slumber; you barely had to do anything and you've already changed me. Are you responsible for waking up the rage, too?_

_What am I going to do?_

_I have to go, Rose; Kuai is done. I'll find you again, soon enough. Wait for me._

_Always and Forever,_

_Your Jade_

********

Slowly, Jade slipped the diary under the couch cushion and waited, knowing that Kuai would walk into the room at any moment. Kuai always finished his workouts with a brisk walk on the treadmill, and as soon as she heard it stop, she knew that her husband would be joining her in the living room; she was not disappointed.

"Just relaxing?" Kuai asked, walking into the room and appearing cutely disheveled, black hair tousled and slick with sweat, and his workout clothes fairly drenched. He lifted his shirt to wipe his face, revealing a flat, pale abdomen; Jade's eyes trailing over the little birthmark right next to his navel.

Jade was making sure to sit up so she didn't need to put any pressure on her back, and when Kuai spoke, she quickly dropped her eyes to the floor; reaching out and picking up the book she'd set aside when she'd started writing in her diary.

"I'm trying to," she replied, stiffly.

Kuai frowned a little, but it wasn't the expression he wore when his anger was mounting. They had a pattern, a routine, that they fell into after a particularly brutal basement session, and Jade was just keeping up her end of things; becoming distant, aloof. Kuai, for his part, became coddling and sweet; especially indulgent until he decided he'd given Jade enough leeway.

"Let me take a look at your sutures," Kuai said, coming over and picking up a bottle of hand sanitizer off the coffee table. He squirted some into his hands and rubbed them, cocking an eyebrow at Jade expectantly. Sighing, Jade lay her book aside and obediently turned, waiting for Kuai to lift her shirt and study the state of her back.

"Now, let's see here." Sitting behind Jade, Kuai kissed her neck lightly before slowly pulling up Jade's shirt, his warm, newly cleaned fingers barely brushing over the black threads weaving their way through Jade's skin. Holding her breath, Jade waited for Kuai to make the wrong move and hurt her, but it didn't happen; rather, he was so gentle that it was almost like he wasn't touching Jade at all.

"They look good," Kuai murmured, ghosting a hand over Jade's aching flesh. "You can take a shower today, but we'll be mindful that the spray isn't too strong, okay? They aren't too red, no pus...I think you're going to make a full recovery." Jade could hear the smile in his voice as Kuai pulled her shirt back down, placing a gentle hand on the slope of Jade's back.

"What a relief," Jade replied, rolling her eyes and not bothering to keep the snap out of her voice. Turning, she looked at Kuai, his hands clasped loosely in his lap.

"Now don't be like that," Kuai said, putting his arm around Jade's shoulders and pulling her close; his fingers winding their way through her hair. Leaning over, he placed a kiss on her temple. "I hate when you get like this, all sullen and quiet; let's be friends again, okay? Besides, you'll only need to have those stitches in for a couple of weeks...then I can remove them and you'll be good as new."

"That's easy for you to say," Jade replied, looking down at her hands; her bottom lip beginning to tremble. "Your back doesn't look like a fucking patchwork quilt."

"And neither does yours, Jade." Kuai pulled her closer and placed a hand on her thigh, rubbing the bare flesh. He preferred for Jade to wear just a long, old t-shirt when she was lounging around the house; it made it easier to undress her when he was in the mood. More often than not, he was in the mood; like now, Jade could already tell.

"I think every part of you is amazing, beautiful," Kuai murmured, wrapping both of his arms around Jade and kissing her throat, tipping her head back so he had full access to her neck. "I can't get enough of you...I'll never be able to."

"Then why do you cut me open?" Jade asked voice tremulous as Kuai nipped at her skin, making her gasp lightly. "Why do you make me bleed?"

"I could ask you the same thing," Kuai said, pulling away and looking into Jade's eyes; his own muted dark brown color. They weren't cold today, if anything they were unbearably warm, practically burning Jade as they studied his face. "Whenever you act like you want to leave like you don't love me anymore, I feel like you're tearing my heart out. Did you know that?"

"I only asked why you punished me, Kuai," Jade sighed, allowing him to pull her to her feet so he could lead her into the hushed, darkened bedroom. "I never said I didn't love you; not once."

"You didn't need to say it," Kuai replied, taking his shirt off and throwing it in the hamper. He carefully removed Jade's shirt as well, taking care not to catch the fabric on her sutures. Backing Jade toward the bed, he held her close and kissed her panting mouth, warm lips meeting in furious, hungry kisses. "I saw it in your eyes, Jade; they were accusing me of something; of everything. I don't need you to question the things I do, I just need you to understand that I'm doing them for your own good; for our own good."

"That's not what I was trying to do," Jade whimpered as Kuai pushed her down, arching her back as it came into contact with the bed.

"Poor baby," Kuai soothed, helping her turn over. "There, get on your hands and knees, that's better." Gently, he eased Jade's underwear down and threw them aside, laying a hand on Jade's hip and squeezing gently. Leaning down, he kissed Jade's cheek and whispered in her ear, making her shiver:

"Do you want me?"

Jade couldn't help but nod her head, shutting her eyes tight and biting her bottom lip; hating herself for giving herself over to Kuai so easily. She hated herself even more for actually being aroused by her husband, especially after what had transpired in the basement, especially after everything. She couldn't help it, though, not when Kuai was being so tender, so wonderfully sweet; he was always like this after an impromptu operation.

"Good," Kuai said, softly pulling his shorts and boxers off. "I love it when you want me, Jade; I can't tell you how happy it makes me feel."

"I'm glad," Jade said, hanging her head and keeping her eyes tightly closed. Easing onto her forearms, she could hear the telltale sound of a dresser drawer opening and closing.

 _Please not the handcuffs,_ she chanted inside her head. _Please, please, please not the handcuffs. I couldn't take it. I couldn't -_

"Why are you shaking like that? I'm not going to hurt you," Kuai said, placing his hand on Jade's lower back. "Be still, okay? I want to make you feel good."

Jade just nodded her head again, waiting, and then she could hear the snap of a bottle being opened and then the feeling of warm, wet fingertips gliding over her vagina, making her moan slightly when they entered her, filling her nicely. Kuai soothed her with quiet, gentle reassurances the whole time, his expert fingers sliding in and out of Jade; preparing him for what was to come.

"You like that, baby?" He asked, voice husky as he grazed another finger over Jade's clitoris; making her jump and moan. "You should see your face. You look so fucking sexy, Jade; I can barely stand it."

"Don't say things like that," Jade said, smiling despite herself; cheeks flushing from such a salacious compliment.

"Why? Are you feeling shy even though I'm finger fucking you right now? Don't you think that's kind of silly, Jade?"

Jade didn't respond, opting instead to hide her face in the blanket; her skin growing even hotter as Kuai continued to prepare her slowly and carefully. Unbidden, thoughts of Liu Kang's honest brown eyes filtered through her mind, and all at once she was clutching the sheets in her hands; moaning loudly as her husband worked her over with deliberate care.

"Someone's ready, I think," Kuai announced, pulling his fingers out of Jade and leaning on the bed, placing a hand on Jade's hip; steadying her. After a moment, he was rubbing his slicked-up cock against Jade's opening, finally pushing into her slowly; sinking into her trembling body inch by agonizing inch. Finally, he was inside of Jade completely and he stayed still for a moment, gripping her hips as Jade waited; bated breath caught in her lungs.

_Why does it have to feel so good when he's like this? So tender...so soft...why can't it be like this all the time?_

Jade's thoughts were interrupted when Kuai began to thrust into her, every movement exquisite and precise, his skills working Jade into a writhing, panting mess; every nerve on fire as Kuai's cock pumped in and out. Jade had never been with anyone else, had only experienced sticky fumblings in backseats and awkward, regrettable petting with her past lovers, so she had nothing to compare her husband to in terms of her sexual prowess, but she had to admit that Kuai knew how to touch her; he knew how to work Jade into a salivating, sex-hungry harlot; gasping and pleading for more.

"Please," Jade cried out, arching upward when Kuai hit her sweet spot; drool sliding over her lips and wetting the blanket beneath her. "Please, god, please don't stop!"

"That's right, Jade," Kuai groaned, lightly slapping his ass; his pace increasing. "Fucking beg for it like the little cock-slut you are...tell me to fuck you harder...!"

Jade became silent, wordlessly straining against the beauty unfolding in her blood, nearly overcome by just how amazing Kuai could make her feel before she felt her husband gripping her hair and pulling her head back; sharpened breath eking through her lips.

"I told you to beg for it, slut," Kuai seethed, yanking harder. "Now, do it. Beg me to fuck you harder or I'll stop completely."

"N-no, don't stop, please," Jade whimpered, melting into the feeling of pain mixing in with her pleasure; Kuai's large hand gripping her hair. She would never openly admit it to anyone, not even her husband, but his savagery in the bedroom was actually something she enjoyed; so long as the handcuffs and biting were kept to a minimum.

"Please fuck me harder, Kuai," she cried out, her husband's thrusts coming hard and fast; his hips coming into contact with the backs of Jade's thighs and creating a delicious slapping noise.

"Say you're my slut, baby," Kuai growled, gripping Jade's hair harder. "Tell me what a cock-slut you are...say you love it when daddy fucks you."

Now they were bordering on dark territory again, and while Jade didn't really mind being treated like a slut when her husband fucked her, it was this degrading habit he had of putting her on the spot, of making her perform that completely disarmed Jade; making her seize up slightly. Yelping, she cringed when Kuai thrust into her in a particularly brutal fashion, no doubt leaving bruises where his strong fingers dug into Jade's delicate hip.

"I-I love it when daddy fucks me," Jade whispered, humiliation washing through her as she heard the words leak from her lips; she hadn't seen her father in over a year. "I-I'm your little cock-slut."

"Yeah, that's it...that's perfect," Kuai breathed, releasing Jade's hair and holding her hips so tightly Jade almost screamed; hard thrusts coming so fast and frenzied now that Jade could only lie limply on the bed as her husband brutalized her; finally reaching a feverish crescendo and grunting as he came. Searing heat poured into Jade's spent body, and she quickly reached back and grabbed Kuai's hand, leading it to her own aching vagina.

"You want daddy to finish you off, baby? Huh?" Kuai purred, rubbing his lube-slick finger inside her, working him with languid strokes and causing Jade to push back against him; playing with her clit until Kuai's fingers brought her to her climax.

"That's it," Kuai murmured, leaning down and kissing Jade's wrecked back and rubbing her breasts with his free hand. "Just let go, Jade...just let go."

Before too long, Jade was whimpering softly, her orgasms always muted even as they tore through her; afraid to make a loud noise that could lead to violence. Kuai had never mistreated her while she was in the throes of ecstasy, but that didn't mean anything in the grand scheme of things; really, anything could happen when it came to her husband. Gently, Kuai continued to play with her until she was finished, and she was shaking like a wounded animal; Kuai still draped across her back and buried deep within her heat.

"Perfect, so, so perfect," Kuai sighed, almost dissolving as he hummed, clearly still floating somewhere above the earth as they both floundered in the tides; the aftermath of an afternoon fuck that almost had the power to defy mere words. Sliding out, he lay on his back and pulled Jade onto her chest, kissing her sweaty temple and rubbing her aching head.

"How was that?"

Jade stretched luxuriously and folded into Kuai's touch, nearly forgetting the horrors of the past few days and getting lost in the glory of what could be; what if it were always like this, rough but pleasurable? God, what a life that would be!

"Amazing," she answered honestly, still not too keen on calling Kuai daddy but willing to play the game if it got her husband's rocks off. "I have to admit you know what you're doing in the bedroom," she added, grinning as she ran a fingertip over Kuai's strong chest, suddenly feeling carefree and playful.

"May I offer a caveat? A very important one, might I add," Kuai replied, smiling as he wounded some of Jade's hair around his fingers.

"Sure, why not?"

"I know my way around the bedroom when it comes to you, Jade; you're the only person I want. Now and forever."

Jade blushed, grinning like a love-struck fool even as her back throbbed faintly. She sat up, staring down at her husband.

"How do you do that?"

"Do what?" Kuai asked, raising his eyebrows.

"It's almost like there's more than one person living inside of you, Kuai. How do you change so quickly?" Jade lay her head on Kyai's chest, listening for his heartbeat and almost sighing when she found it; faint whooshes filling up her eardrum.

"I'm a mirror, Jade. I only give back what you give me. You should know that."

Feeling suddenly uneasy, already seeing that this was a trail that could lead to a battle, Jade decided to backpedal.

"Do you remember the first time we had sex?"

Kuai laughed, and it was genuine, deep, and building low in his stomach; Jade loved to hear it. She adored her husband when he was actually happy; the anger dying down and only the good taking its place.

"Of course I do," he said, nuzzling Jade's hair, taking a deep breath, and sighing into her scent. "You were so shy. It took almost an hour just to get you to take your clothes off."

"I'd never been completely naked with another person," Jade grinned, falling into the memories but not becoming lost. Rather, she wanted to walk through them like one would a winding country road; almost feeling like she was going home again. "And I wasn't sure you'd like what I, you know, had to offer."

"I don't know how you could ever feel shy around me," Kuai said, lapsing into a more serious tone; arm tightening around Jade's body and drawing her closer. "I love you. I've loved you for so long I almost can't remember what life was like before we got together."

"You romantic thing, you," Jade teased, eating up every word. "I know it was horribly cliche, but do you remember what I said after we did it that first time?"

Kuai became quiet for a moment, fingers tangling in Jade's hair as he stared at the ceiling, his whole body relaxing; all tension leaking out of him.

"Yeah," he replied, softly. "I'll never forget it, actually. That was the first time you told me you loved me."

*******

"That's interesting."

Jade glanced over her shoulder and stepped back from her painting, a brush clenched in her hand as she waited for Kuai to come closer. She'd been quietly working on the canvas for the better part of the afternoon after they'd relaxed in bed for a while; Kuai deciding he wanted to have sex once more before setting Jade free.

 _Actually, it was almost like making love,_ Jade smiled, leaning into Kuai as he wrapped his arms around Jade's shoulders; continuing to study the painting. Kuai had been soft when he'd taken Jade the second time, slipping into her gently and slowly; kissing her mouth and cradling Jade in his arms like she was a priceless objet d'art. Lord, how she loved days like this; days spent happily at home, just being kind to one another. A pervasive sadness gripped her at the thought, knowing on a deeper level that golden days like this only came about after the dreaded darkness; she willed the thought away, sinking deeper into her husband's embrace.

"I don't get it," Kuai said, kissing Jade's shoulder after pulling her shirt aside just a tad. He pointed at the painting. "What does it mean?"

Jade regarded the painting for a moment, brilliant late afternoon sunlight streaming through the windows and illuminating the canvas, saturated in various shades of red; streaks of paint etched through and practically shouting at the onlooker. She shrugged.

"Do you know who Jackson Pollock is?" She asked, not wanting to go into the deeper meanings of the painting; how she sometimes imagined the red wasn't paint at all, but rather her husband's blood drenching the rough fibers. To Jade, the painting spoke of rage and confusion, of reaching one's limit and not really knowing how to proceed but having to continue anyway. Every time she looked at the painting it seemed to reinforce and echo her growing desperation; her relentless misery.

Kuai thought for a moment, still clinging to Jade and smelling of her expensive perfume and something faintly fruit-laced; almost like an apple pie baking. Jade kissed his arm, fairly becoming lost in being near to him when he was being so dear and loving.

"I think I do," he finally said. "Didn't we see one of his paintings at the Met? It was all drippy and frenetic."

"Autumn Rhythm," Jade murmured, fondly remembering the whirlwind trip they'd taken two years before to New York City; Kuai surprising her just out of nowhere. "Abstract expressionism, that's what he was really known for."

"So, is this abstract expressionism, too?" He gestured toward the painting.

Jade snorted and rolled her eyes.

"I don't know what the fuck this is, Kuai," he sighed, staring at her painting with critical eyes. "I was just hoping to capture the immediacy of my feelings."

_Of my rage._

"The immediacy of your feelings, huh?" Kuai asked, his tone becoming faintly amused. Jade tensed up to hear it, knowing ridicule would probably be forthcoming. Instead, Kuai lapsed into silence, still gazing at the canvas.

"I'm pretty simple when it comes to art stuff, Jade, but when I look at this," he paused, kissing Jade's shoulder again, "I see bitterness. But I'm probably completely wrong, right?"

Startled, Jade pulled away to look at Kusi's face.

"Really?" She asked. "You mean it?"

Kuai stared at her, face impassive. He shrugged.

"I mean, I guess. Is that what you were going for?"

"Among other things," Jade said, tucking a hair behind her ear and looking away; not wanting to reveal anymore through the look in his eyes.

"What do you have to be bitter about?" Kuai asked, pulling on the back of Jade's shirt, making him arch slightly; she squeaked when her sutures were disturbed.

Pulling away, Jade went to lay her paintbrush down, bare feet ghosting over the studio's wooden floor. Once again she was in her old t-shirt and pajamas, slender legs naked and slightly chilled. For the first time that day, she could feel the anger working its way through her veins, spurned by Kuai's dismissal of her feelings. He knew very well what Jade had things to be bitter about, at least he should; he was far more perceptive than most people would think.

"Well, are you going to answer me? It was a simple question, Jade," Kuai asked, watching her move around the studio; putting things away.

"Nothing, Kuai. I don't have anything to be bitter about, okay?" Jade replied, opening a can of paint thinner, wrinkling her nose at the odor. "I don't want to talk about this."

"Wrong answer," Kuai said immediately, advancing on Jade and automatically making her back up; leaving the brush and paint thinner behind. "You don't get to take a pass like that, Jade. You can't dismiss my question just because you don't feel like answering."

"Why not?" Jade asked, immediately regretting her words as soon as they left her mouth. Her eyes widened, watching Kuai with growing apprehension. "Sorry, I didn't mean -"

"You know, ever since you started working at that fucking gallery you've become pretty snobby, Jade," Kuai cut her off, eyes narrowing. He'd stopped walking toward Jade but his stance was becoming decidedly tense, almost like he was growing larger as every minute passed. "I'm sorry I didn't know who the fuck Jackson Pollock was right off the top of my head, but you could at least pretend to give a shit about my questions. Christ, I'm just fucking trying to get to know you better."

"I-I know that, Kuai. I wasn't trying to -"

"Why do you shut me out whenever you can? Like when we were at the gallery and I asked you which of those photos was your favorite. I saw your face when I pointed to the lighthouse; it's your favorite, isn't it? Well? Tell me!"

Jade winced when Kuai's voice became louder, bordering on a yell but not quite there yet. Desperately, she tried to keep the conversation from lapsing into an argument; they'd been having such a nice day. It didn't help that fleeting thoughts of Liu Kang were assaulting her again, how easy he'd been when he'd asked about the photos he'd taken; never pressing Jade for more information than she was willing to give.

"You're right," she replied, faintly; staring at the sunshine-covered floor. "It was my favorite."

Abruptly, Kuai strode over to Jade and gripped her arms tightly. Jade immediately went slack, the old, familiar terror seizing her and making her withdraw; retreating into herself where tenuous safety could be found.

"Why did you lie to me then? Why?" Kuai asked, shouting now while shaking her like a rag doll.

Biting her lip, Jade closed her eyes, the pain in her back reaching a hectic fever-pitch.

"Why did you want to know what my favorite was in the first place?" She finally asked, not even caring at this point if Kuai struck her. What did it matter? He'd find a reason to be angry no matter what, she may as well have something of a say. "You don't care about art, and I know that you hate that I paint. I know you think my paintings are worthless."

Kuai stopped shaking him, taking hold of Jade's face.

"Open your eyes and look at me," he said, no longer shouting; his voice taking on a broken quality Jade hadn't heard before. Opening her eyes, she stared up at Kuai and waited, completely at a loss.

"How could you say that, Jade?" Kuai asked, brown eyes searching her face; flicking quickly like a hummingbird. "Why do you assume I think your paintings are worthless? I never once said that."

"You didn't need to," Jade said, dropping her gaze and hating the burn gathering in her eyes. Why did she always have to cry so quickly? Why did Kuai make it so easy? "I just know, Kuai."

"There's a difference between thinking something's worthless and not understanding it," Kuai said, letting her go. "Have you ever stopped to consider that maybe I'm proud of you, that I think it's amazing that you have the ability to create?"

Jade shook her head, the tears beginning to fall now. She'd never once considered that possibility, not in a million years; not with her husband's dismissive attitude.

"Well, did you ever even think of asking me? How am I supposed to defend myself or fight against your assumptions if you won't even talk to me? God, I'm screwed before I even begin."

Staring at him, Jade couldn't comprehend what she was hearing; Kuai had never spoken like this, assuming a vulnerability that was so contrary to his personality that Jade couldn't even formulate a response.

"Fine, that's just great," Kuai said, speaking after the silence had stretched on for an almost unbearable length. He turned away, glancing back; eyes having lost their vulnerability and becoming remote again, his basement eyes. "Keep me in the dark if that's what you want."

Striding toward the door, he spoke without turning again:

"I came to tell you dinner's ready. I made your favorite, not that it matters at this point."

******

They were in the dining room, candlelight flickering as the tinkling sounds of clinking cutlery pervaded the room; Chopin playing quietly in the background. The meal was lovely, country pot roast with roasted carrots and potatoes, rugged food that Jade adored and Kuai merely tolerated; he'd prepared it just for Jade, to make her happy. He had a habit of cooking a special meal for Jade after taking her to the basement, and this time around was no exception.

"This is wonderful," Jade murmured, breaking the silence that had developed between them. Kuai had been distant, sullen, since their exchange in the studio; sitting across the table and sipping on his Merlot more than he ate. He grunted in response to Jade's compliment.

Taking a deep breath, Jade decided to try again. Usually, she'd be on edge because she wouldn't know where Kuai's dark mood was coming from, but this time she had a pretty good idea.

 _I think I hurt his feelings,_ Jade thought, setting his fork down quietly. _I didn't even think that was possible._

"I ate this exact same thing on our first date. Remember?" She smiled hopefully, alternating between apprehension and vague irritation; annoyed that she had to attend to Kuai's wounded feelings even after everything that had happened in the past couple of days. She pushed the irritation away, though; unable to overlook the guilt she felt at making her husband upset. Wasn't he trying? Wasn't it sweet that he wanted to know everything about her?

Kuai didn't answer for a moment, reaching over and picking up the wine bottle. He poured some into his glass while watching Jade out of the corner of his eye, face stony and giving back absolutely nothing. Over the years, Jade had noticed that Kuai had become an expert at artfully shutting her out, keeping her at arms' length until Jade couldn't help but fold; begging him to just talk to her so the awful tension would dissipate. She had reason to believe Kuai was doing this now, and it hurt so badly because they'd been having such a wonderful, calm day.

"Yes, I remember," he finally replied, setting the wine bottle down carefully and picking up his glass; swirling it gently. "Why do you think I made this for you, Jade? Heaven forbid I actually put some thought into something, right?"

Jade sighed, stomach clenching up painfully. She needed to tread carefully, very carefully; if she didn't, she could kiss going to work the next day goodbye. She remembered her promise to Liu, that she'd be waiting for him, and she steeled her resolve; assuring herself that she would endure whatever was about to happen. Maybe she could even rectify the situation.

"You put thought into everything you do for me, Kuai; I know that," Jade murmured, eyes downcast as she studied her plate; tender pot roast swimming in a fragrant gravy. Right now she didn't think she could eat a bite, not with so much worry flooding her mind. "I'm sorry I made assumptions about you. I wasn't being fair."

"You mean that?" Kuai asked, voice sharp. Jade couldn't help but feel slight elation, though; at least Kuai was being somewhat receptive.

"Of course I do," she replied, looking up and catching Kuai's eyes with her own. The candelabra sat between them, shifting and throwing shadows across the lace tablecloth; Kuai had gone all out with the dinner preparations. Jade suddenly felt almost painfully tender towards her husband. Standing, she came around the table and approached Kuai like she would a tensed cobra; just waiting for him to strike.

Kuai set his glass of wine down and pushed away from the table, arching an eyebrow and waiting.

"I should've told you about the lighthouse." Jade stole closer, already beginning to shake but trying to keep the tremors out of her voice. "Can you forgive me? Please?"

Kuai just stared at her for a moment, face still awash in candlelight and suspicion, but there was a slight change; ice cracking and falling apart. Wordlessly, he patted his leg and like a whipped puppy, Jade gladly came to him and sat in his lap; nuzzling close to him and resting her face against her husband's cheek.

"I just want to know everything about you, Jade. I feel like you resent me for that," Kuai said, wrapping a strong arm around Jade's waist; his hand coming to rest on her thigh. "Isn't it normal to want to know the person you love completely?"

Jade nodded, continuing to rub her cheek against Kuai's, breathless euphoria overtaking her at her triumph; she'd managed to avoid the cataclysm!

"Sometimes you feel so unreachable, did you know that?" Kuai asked, drawing Jade's lips to his own and kissing her softly, his hand cupping Jade's face. "I have you here in my arms but you're so far away, almost like you aren't even real."

Jade pulled back, studying her husband's face; not really sure how to respond. Kuai had a tendency of becoming pensive, almost morose after the tension reached its zenith and they were picking their way through the aftermath; clearly, that was the case here.

"Why is the lighthouse your favorite?" Kuai asked, voice soft.

Jade shrugged, feeling shy and on edge again. Mostly, she tried to keep their exchanges on the surface; it's when they delved into the profound that they got into trouble. Or she did, at any rate. It couldn't be helped, though; they'd already come too far in this line of questioning and confession.

"It's wild and lonely, all at the same time," she said, looking away; she didn't want Kuai to see her face as she spoke. "It's a part of the earth but not of it, all at once. Does that make any sense? It's almost like it seems sad, or lost."

"I think so," Kuai said, hugging Jade close though he didn't force her to look in his eyes; something Jade was eternally grateful for. "Maybe you identify with it on some level."

"What do you mean?"

Kuai was silent for a time, the nocturnes rushing in and filling up the empty spaces in the room. Suddenly, Jade was aware that her heart was thumping swiftly in his chest, a restless rabbit running, running.

"Let's just say your eyes give away more than you think," Kuai finally said, reaching out and grabbing his glass of wine. He took a long sip, continuing to hold Jade close. Pressing a wine-scented kiss against Jade's cheek, he sighed softly.

"I know you like to think that you aren't transparent, Kyle, but I think you should realize something." Reaching up, he turned Jade's face, their gazes once again converging. "You can't keep anything from me, no matter how hard you try. Eventually, whatever it is, I'll figure it out; just remember that."

******

It was raining again the next day, the weekend's sunshine disappearing overnight and giving way to grey skies that dripped steadily over the muted town. Jade couldn't help but heave a sigh as she sat in his corner of the gallery, attending to a particularly ornate frame but her mind drifting constantly. Her back was aching and Kuai had been kind enough to give her some Tylenol-3 just in case the pain became too great, but she didn't want to take it while she was at work. Besides, it wasn't like she couldn't deal with discomfort; she'd certainly had plenty of practice.

They'd had a pleasant enough breakfast that morning, free of tension or discord though Kuai made it abundantly clear that he wasn't thrilled that Jade was going back to work so soon. He'd wanted his wife to stay home and rest but Jade had told him she'd be just fine, that having something to do actually helped her forget about the throbbing wounds. Kuai had just rolled his eyes and gone back to his paper, reaching out to touch the customary red rose in its crystal vase on occasion.

They were safely, or at least comfortably, ensconced in the honeymoon period where everything was so sweet and serene that Jade could almost allow herself to be lulled into her stupor again. But something was different this go around, and she was just about to pull out her diary and write out her conflicting feelings when the bell tinkled above the gallery's front door, causing her to look up; broken from her rumination.

"I was hoping you'd be here," Liu Kang grinned, walking across the gallery, but he wasn't alone. Kung Lao was with him, baby Oliver nestled in his arms and straining to get down like a typical toddler. "Are you feeling better?"

Jade waved the question away, getting up slowly from her stool and coming around the counter with her arms outstretched; blissful excitement waking up in her blood and pushing her melancholy away.

"Can I hold him? Please?" She asked, gazing at the little one with adoration. Jade couldn't help but love Lao and Kitana's baby boy, who seemed to be the perfect combination of her parents: dark hair and serious eyes, the same brown as Lao's, but sharp like her mother's.

"Hey, if you can keep him from trying to make a break for it, more power to you," Kung Lao said, gratefully handing the toddler over and grinning as Jade took him into her arms.

"He's getting so big," Jade said, hugging Oliver close and breathing in his milky, baby scent; so soft and innocent. 

"And smart," Lao said, pride threading through his tone. "He's already trying to walk, can you believe that?"

"I can completely believe that. Do you remember me?" She asked, looking into Oliver's bright eyes. Oliver just smiled, reaching up and taking a fistful of Jade's hair; yanking on it and making her yelp.

"He definitely remembers your hair," Lao laughed, turning to Liu Kang. "He's always had a thing for Aunt Jade's hair."

"Can't say that I blame him," Liu said, watching with fondness as Jade held the child close, closing her eyes for a moment and just reveling in how healthy and normal it felt to hug him; to see her friends again.

"What are you doing here?" Jade asked, opening her eyes and peering at Lao. "Don't you have to work?"

"He's finally taking some time off," Kitana said, coming into the room and smiling brightly to see Oliver; who squealed loudly and immediately held his arms out to his mother. "Come to mama, baby boy. Did you miss me?"

Reluctantly, Jade relinquished the baby, hardly surprised at the faint stirrings of jealousy as Oliver cuddled into his mother's arms, resting his flushed, plump baby cheek against Kitana's shoulder. This was what true, unsullied love looked like; a child folding themselves into the arms of a parent. She would have cried to see such unadulterated closeness, purer than air or water and just as important. Her back throbbed faintly, only serving to reinforce her burgeoning discontent; the feeling of being on the outside looking in tearing at her heart.

"Are you ready to go to lunch?" Liu asked, snapping Jade out of her thoughts. "Isn't this awesome? When was the last time just the three of us were able to go out?"

"God, it's been forever," Kung Lao said, running a hand through his hair and staring at Jade, almost like he was seeing her for the first time. "Are you doing okay? I feel like I haven't gotten to see you in -"

"Three months. It's been three months," Jade interjected, walking behind the counter to grab her bag; wincing slightly when her shirt caught on a suture, tugging it slightly. "And I'm fine, Lao. Why do you ask me that every time you see me? My life is completely routine."

"Right, routine," Liu said, glancing at Kung Lao; the two of them exchanging a look that didn't sit well with Jade. "Anyway, what are you two feeling? There's a great Chinese place -"

Suddenly, the bell tinkled over the door again, and they all turned to see who it was; a collective pall being cast almost immediately.

"Am I interrupting something?" Kuai asked, walking into the gallery; dressed in his scrubs but wearing a light jacket to shield himself from the rain. His hair was faintly moist and he brought the scent of rainfall with him, his eyes darting around at the faces regarding him before settling on Jade; eyebrows raised.

"Kuai, hey," Kitana said, finally breaking the silence as she clung to Oliver. "This is unexpected."

"Yeah, a case was cancelled because the guy failed his pre-op, so I found myself with some extra time." His eyes flitted away from Jade and came to rest on Oliver, faint irritation registering in his expression. The toddler stared at Kuai for a moment before he frantically started to wiggle out of Kitana's arms, beginning to shriek.

"Ollie, what in the world has gotten into you?" Kitana asked, struggling to keep a hold on the child until she finally had to give up; kneeling down and letting her son slump on the floor. Quickly, Oliver started crawling across the gallery and straight toward Kuai, stopping and peering up at him with wide eyes.

"Oliver, come here, baby," Lao said, starting to come forward; eyes narrowed with obvious worry.

Instead of listening, the toddler reached out and took hold of Kuai's scrub pants, trying to pull himself up. Kuai smirked, holding up a hand to Kung Lao.

"It's okay," he said. "May I?"

Lao glanced at Kitana quickly, who nodded her head lightly after a moment's pause.

"Sure, yeah. Go ahead, man," Kung Lao conceded, body still tensed. "I just didn't think you liked kids."

"They're okay," Kuai said, leaning down and gently gathering Oliver into his arms, where he immediately went still; curling into him and taking hold of his jacket. "Yours is pretty cute, all things considered."

"You're too kind," Kitana said, walking up beside Lao and taking a hold of his hand.

Holding the baby close, Kuai flicked his focus to Liu Kang, who'd been watching the events unfolding with a firmly set jaw; moving closer to Jade almost like he was trying to shield her. Kuai arched a brow at him, frowning slightly.

"When did you come back to town? I thought you had to travel because of your job or whatever."

"I do, but I had to come back to take care of my mom," Liu replied, deftly sidestepping Kuai's question. "How have you been? I heard you're really making a name for yourself up at Fairbanks."

"Is that so?" Kuai asked, eyes momentarily drifting to Jade before focusing on Liu Kang again. "Yeah, I guess you could say that. It's nice to know I'm garnering something of a reputation."

Finally, Jade couldn't bear the gathering tension any longer and she moved to approach her husband, finding it terribly surreal to see him holding Lao's son in his arms. She reached out and placed a hand on Kuai's arm, wanting to placate and wish him away all at the same time.

"Is something wrong?" She asked. "Did you need to tell me something?"

Kuai turned away, gaze drifting over the group again before walking over to the far wall and stopping in front of Liu's array of photographs. Hugging Ollie close, he wordlessly lifted the lighthouse picture and gripped it in his hand, pausing for a second before coming back to Jade's side.

"I wanted to buy this for you," he said. "Since you like it so much." He glanced at Kitana. "It is for sale, right?"

"Well, sure. Of course. But if Kyle likes it so much I could just -"

"I'm not taking a handout, not for my wife," Kuai cut her off, curtly. "How much is it?"

"Right, of course," Kitana replied, her usually strong voice softening slightly. "Come over here and I'll ring you up, Kuai. Lao, has Ollie already eaten, or..."

"I was going to feed her when we got to the restaurant," Kung Lao replied, moving to take his son from Kuai's arms; the child began to screech as soon as he was lifted away. A pregnant moment passed before Lao cleared his throat, regarding Kuai.

"We were going to take Jade out to lunch. Did you want to come with us? It'd give us a chance to catch up, especially since Liu's back and everything."

There was a flash, a movement, in Kuai's face that only Jade had the power to see; a secret look unfolding that made her mouth go dry as she slowly began to shake. Almost feeling mechanical, she stiffly retreated behind the counter and gripped its edge, faint dizziness taking hold of her as she watched her husband consider Lao's invitation.

"It's really nice of you to ask but I only really had time to stop by," Kuai said, shifting his eyes to meet Jade's before turning his head. "I just wanted to make sure that I bought the picture before someone else did, but maybe some other time, okay?"

"Are you sure, Kuai?" Jade spoke up, almost not recognizing her voice; hearing it almost as it sounded when it ricocheted off the basement walls. "I mean, you and I could just go grab something really quickly if you wanted."

Kuai shook his head slowly, the veiled expression still evident to Jade while becoming lost on everyone else.

"No, that's okay, baby girl," he replied, holding the lighthouse up and shaking it a little. "I'll see you later on at home. I'll have the picture waiting so we can hang it up. How's that sound?"

Jade nodded, suddenly aware that everyone in the room was staring at her; feeling that same sensation of being exposed and on display.

"Well, if you're sure..."

"I'm absolutely sure," Kuai suddenly smiled. "Have fun with your friends, okay? I'll see you tonight, and we can talk then. No big deal."


End file.
